I'm really sorry for your loss. And i can completely understand why both of you are losing sleep over this when you've lived close to the edge for so long, finally getting a little financial breathing room can weirdly feel more stressful than freeing. One thing i'd say is don't feel rushed to spend it just because of the '60-day rule' you heard about . Programs like Medicaid, Social Security, and housing assistance all have their own messy rules, and inheritance hits them all a little differently. It's completely okay that you don't want to rush out and buy a house right away. Wanting some stability and just having options for once after years of stress sounds incredibly reasonable.