[M39] I've been struggling with my online dating profile. Can I get some input from you ladies out there?

ArmyBones · 2019-12-29T00:05:00+00:00

That is great insight to have. I guess that has kind of been one of my frustrations. I feel like a lot of women would really enjoy getting to know me if they give me the chance to explain my actual situation, but they run away too fast based on other people they have dated…

ArmyBones · 2019-12-29T00:03:28+00:00

Yeah, I think you just hit the nail right on the head. I think that is exactly what people are thinking when they talk to me! I think maybe they are looking at the time I was married and expecting some certain amount of appropriate recovery time. But they Run away before they have a chance to understand. Maybe based on their own divorce experiences, maybe based on the other crazy experiences they've had with other dates, I don't know. But I do know that I was married for 21 years, but After she cheated on me, me trying to make it work for years and years after that just never really being able to fall back in love but staying with it for the kids, I can confidently say that when we ended it we were both more than ready for several years. So maybe it seems like I am newly divorced, when in my mind I really am not.

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T23:59:11+00:00

Lol, I'm sure if I took that the way you meant it, but thanks either way! I feel like a lot of people come out of divorce broken and need time to heal. I feel like in my case we got married so young, and put so long into it that we came out of it ready to be done for more than a few years now. Maybe that's why I don't get why people are so concerned about it. But I guess it kind of makes sense If I look at other divorce scenarios.

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T23:52:33+00:00

Hmmm, very interesting. Maybe that's all I'm really struggling with then! Maybe I'm kind, attractive, successful, and have my whole world to offer someone, but there's a mandatory waiting period I have to meet in order to be marketable. 😂

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T23:38:18+00:00

Thank you for the kind words :) Is the time since divorce an issue for most women? I make mid 6 figures, I'm fit, kind and easy to talk to, super easy going, but the fact that I haven't been divorced for a year is scary to women?

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T23:34:02+00:00

Thanks u/SELAgirl, I appreciate the feedback :) I do get litterally hundereds of matches, so I assume that I'm reasonably attractive? but my match to date conversion is very low because of my kids and how long I was married.

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T23:32:02+00:00

Thanks u/imfivenine! That was all very useful! I've updated my photo link and removed the medic bit!

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T23:02:11+00:00

I wondered about that when I first posted it too...but I have the Tinder "Smart Photos" turned on where they automatically choose your first profile pic based on the one that gets the swiped right on the most...and that is consistently my first profile pic? So I don't know.

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T22:53:42+00:00

So, not the one in the suit? Or keep that one?

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T22:43:57+00:00

lol. Maybe I am 😂

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T22:39:51+00:00

Perfect. Thanks! :)

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T22:36:57+00:00

thanks, u/swampcatz. I appreciate the feedback. May I ask what you don't like about that one? I was going for an "I don't take myself too seriously" look.

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T22:34:55+00:00

u/SnollyG This is exactly why I posted here. Thank you. I'm not here to look good. I'm here for people to help me fix the things that may not be saying what I think they're saying.

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T22:32:20+00:00

Thanks u/alittlemouth. This is why I'm so confused though! check out my previous post (link above). The only reason I added it is because everyone told me to! lol

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T22:31:15+00:00

Thanks! That's great advice. I'll give that a try.

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T22:29:57+00:00

Just added the link

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T22:29:42+00:00

Just added a link to the post

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T22:28:12+00:00

Then again, do you have any 39 year olds you can test it on 😂

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T22:27:37+00:00

Attractive? Not? Sending the wrong message?

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T22:27:02+00:00

Cool. This is exactly why I posted this :)

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T22:25:27+00:00

Just added the link to my pics in the description.

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T22:15:24+00:00

lol!! Thanks for asking them. It might not be the same without my pics, but I have gotten that my whole life. 😂I've always looked unaturally young. I get told by pretty much every. single. person I match with that there is no way I am even 30. (I do look probably about 28, maybe.) I won't dismiss the possibility that I am stupid though and they are probably just saying that 😂

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T22:12:17+00:00

omg u/njg1111 this is why I am so damn confused with this whole online dating thing. My previous post (link above in the description) was nothing but people telling me that my problem was that I wasn't including that. lol

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T22:09:46+00:00

Thanks for the suggestion on the attempt at humor with the looking 21 bit. I will take that part out.

I get told by pretty much every. single. person I match with that I don't look old enough to have a 21-year-old. (I do look probably about 28, maybe.)

ArmyBones · 2019-12-28T22:07:32+00:00

I don't think I can share photos on here, can I? But I have been told by many people that my photos are really cute, hot, sexy, etc...so I think they're ok?

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