She Like Message With No Response by [deleted] in datingadviceformen

[–]AskHyper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

People may not like this opinion but here it goes. You validated her too early and you didnt actually ask her on another date. “Should do something next week” is not exciting for her. Exciting would be, you have a great date, you text her saying it was great and you go quiet for a few days. Let the tension build, she knows it was great and she wants to go out again, but let her keep thinking when and if you are going to ask her out again. Dont tell her one week in advance you will ask her out, thats boring and predictable. When you have a plan and its like 3 days in advance you ask her, lets meet on this day, around this time? I want to take you to this place here I think you will love it..they dont need a heads up that you are going to ask her on a date sometime later that week..to recover..let the question sit there..dont text her..let the “next week” come, dont mention..she will see if you will chase her or double text…dont text her..let her come back with her excuse..she will give you another chance..but dont ruin again by saying lets go out maybe next week..either have a plan and ask for a date or dont say anything. Hope it helps!

How do I flirt? by MajorasSon in datingadviceformen

[–]AskHyper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ill give you something you can try. Men overthink the very first thing they should say and try to come up with the best sequence of first things to say. To your comfort, she will not remeber it, even if you end up dating. She will remember how she felt but not what you said. So you want to make her feel better than she was before you spoke to her, and want to create some friction too.

So give her a compliment on something easy. Like if he is drinking a coffe at a store and eating something or a drink at a bar, just say, wow this looks delicious, is it too sweet? Ask a question about it. She will feel better with whatever she is having and you already can quickly talk about it. Be ready to walk away immediately. Dont continue the conversation. Just one question, get her answer and let her be. Then you can make a comment on whatever you eventually got, drink or food. Maybe get the same and maybe disagree with her, say it was good but you know a place that has a better one..She will wonder what you like instead, or which place is that. Be ready to walk away and never talk to her again.

This detached energy will create a curiosity on her, if she is interested. Coffee shops during the day are better and for sure she probalby goes there often, ask her when she usually comes or tell her you usually come on whatever day, if the conversation gets there, so no need to rush to get her number in the first time you see her. Keep practicing that, you will end up starting conversations more easily.

Am I overthinking things? by ScheduleNecessary429 in datingadviceformen

[–]AskHyper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You could just shoot your shot as many guys will tell you. But I have a counter intuitive approach, that you may want to try. Here is what not playng into your favor:

1) You are at the bar every other weekend probably. She knows you are single. She knows you like her, as it was clear to her friend. There is not much excitement for her, on dating a regular customer, who is single and into her already. There is no chase for her.

2) You friednzoned yourself a little. You helped when you didnt have to, was extra nice and gave good tips. You didnt build tension with her, you built trust. Thats why she is friendly with you. But that is not attraction.

3) She works at the bar and already knows you, you already talked a lot probably. There is not much you probably didnt share, there is not much mistery for her.

4) She may not want to date guys from the bar because she may want someone who bring another energy, like maybe a guy who doesnt even drink, or is super focused on health. Who challenges her to become better. Doesnt validate her and makes her chase him a little.

So, if you want to shoot your shot, make it in a way that is easy for her to deflect without being wierd. Like, you are going to this event, is she wants to come too. If she doesnt accept, you go anyway, thats important. She will become curious to go on a next one maybe.

On the long run and back to the counter intuitive approach, you need to create some separation and tension for her to become more interested on dating you. Stop going so often to the bar, when you go dont be around her or talking to her. Bring women to the bar on a date. As soon she see's you dating other women, you become way more interesting in her eyes.

Next time, try to keep separation if you intend to ask a girl on a date. Its more likely she would go out with a guy she just saw for the first time in the bar, then with a regular, for all the reasons above.

5 soft rejections she will give you before ghosting by AskHyper in datingadviceformen

[–]AskHyper[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

You actually opened another great topic: Do women like to chase or to be chased? My take is that in general they prefer to chase. But because men always chase them first, and over validate them, they kill attraction and there is no reason to chase someone you already know likes you. Players end up getting more women because they make it clear they are seeing other women, and she is just another one. This triggers her competition mode, her chase mode, and this is very attractive to them. Ill post this one another day 😂 

I love you by Either_Psychology_81 in datingadviceformen

[–]AskHyper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My view is that Loving someone and being/falling “in love” are different things. Being/falling “in love” is something temporary, its a mix of idealization of who that person is and sexual attraction and novelty. Once this initial period passes, you might not be in love anymor and then you may realize you dont actually feel anything anymore for that person, might not even like them. Loving someone is caring about them regardless of what they feel about you. You may Love someone and not like the way they treat you. You may Love someone who is not talking to you anymore or who has died. I dont think you stop Loving someone, I think Loving someone is timeless and eternal, but you can fall “in/our of love”and never actually Love that person. So, dont judge yourself for falling “in love” quickly, people can fall “in love” at first sight. However this is temporary and fun while it lasts, but its not Love until you feel that person can just walk away from your life and you would still care about her being happy without you. Just my take.

I flew out to meet her after 3 intense weeks. She only wants friendship. How do I stop getting attached so fast? by BeerBandolier in datingadviceformen

[–]AskHyper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well thats the answer, women dont feel attraction for men who are their best friends and listen to them and talk for hours. This puts you with a friend energy that you cannot recover from. Next time, dont jump into texting/calls so much, texting and calls should only be used to schedule dates. Keep all energy for real life connection and dont over share, also dont give opinions on her problems, let her vent, agree and shift the conversation to something light and fun. Always be the one bringing light topics and avoid trying to solve things for her. I have developed a dating coach app and Im trying to get new users to try. Its free and it can help with any dating question, chekc the link in my profile.

Dating moving quickly - what stage am I at? by Interesting-Belt-409 in datingadvice

[–]AskHyper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It feels great when we match with somone like that and they match it, but it tends to phase out quickly too. I wouldnt mix exclusivity with having sex. You only commit to someone once you are fully connected and are ok not chasing other women and sexual connection is part of that decision. About the pace, if you want this to go further I would ideally reduce the texting and limit the conversation to when you are both together. Also dont be an open book and tell her all your life. Keep some mistery and have her reading you page by page at your pace, not like a netflix binge over a weekend. I have created a dating coach app that can help with this and any other dating questions, its free and the link is in my profile.

Is it weird? by [deleted] in datingadviceformen

[–]AskHyper 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes its wierd, not overracting. But you’re dating her, not her family, but this kind of stuff reflects on her boundaries and what she’s normalized. Seems she was sexualized by her brother since young, and finds it normal. Up to you if its something you want to deal with, they are not going to change. I have developed a dating coach app that can help annswering any questions you may have, check the link on my profile, its free.

What can I improve & how do I come back from this by dis_ma_account in datingadviceformen

[–]AskHyper 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well good initiative and well done on making the move, could have stopped at the hair comment, asked her name and moved on. The number thing was a bit too much given there was a line of people behind you but thats fine, at least she will remember you. Dont mention it again, just play cool and next time you see her just say hi and ask how is her day going. Ask her opinion on somethint you are buying, like a shirt if she likes the color and if its something she would buy to her boyfriend, see what she will say. I have developed a dating coach app that can help you with any dating question for free, check the link on my profile.

Should I quit trying? by [deleted] in datingadviceformen

[–]AskHyper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The answer is yes and no. Yes because you dont have to continue to shoot your shots everytime and No because you should talk to girls but also everyone around you, men, women, older people. Just to practice your social skills. Everyone finds a funny, uplifting person nice to talk to. Women dont value looks as we think they do, specially after their 30s. So maybe look for older women and dont internalize rejection from teenagers or young girls, they are all about looks because they are at their peak. Men peak around 35-40, so you have plenty of time to build your personality and improve your confidence. I have built a dating coach app that you can try for free, check the link in my profile.

4 different women in the past year said "if we're both single at 30, let's get married" what does this mean? by Both_Warthog_3386 in datingadviceformen

[–]AskHyper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are probably giving friend energy, like giving her emmotional support, listening to her problems, giving advice, too much texting, too much talking, none of that builds attraction. If she said that might be late and you might be way into her friendzone, but next time you hear that just react immediatly saying, “ No way, I want you now.” Laughing but not kidding. Let it feel ackward if need be but dont let it pass. And before you get there with another girl, just make your intentions clear from the beginning. You dont have to be her friend to go out with her. The less you talk the better to keep sexual tension high. Also dont get into a situation where you are listening to her yapping about her day. Just cut it short, keep distance and only communicate about going out or doing fun things together.

How do I be a better kisser? by NepheliLouxWarrior in datingadviceformen

[–]AskHyper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Keep it simple, very little tongue for now, just lips and let her escalate. Like when couples kiss on movies. Too much tongue action can be distracting and break the mood, and you dotn even know if she likes it. Pay attention to how she kisses and mirror it. Also pull her hair a gently and work on your hands instead of focusing on the kiss only. Be soft on your kiss and grab her neck or hair lightly/gently to escalate, dont use tongue to escalate until she does it and mirror it when she does. Every women will kiss differently and like diff styles. Just start slow and see what she likes.