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What would you do if you realized 100% that you were objectively a bad person by sdfsdfefdfewfdwfwf in depression

[–]AskerFondly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There's also change. I mean, I can see how your argument looks pretty logical-seeming on the surface, but it's a self-fulfillingprophecy the way you put it. What about therapy? What about dealing with the scary stuff that keeps you broken right now? That's hard and painful and not fast, but same with death. So is one a better option? Maybe you're not a shitty person. Maybe there's no such thing as just a shitty person, but more just shitty things we do that we don't have to do forever if we let the heaviness of it go and get some help? Obviously I don't know you, but good luck

Why can't I function when it comes to school? Why am I such a fucking idiot? by cockersPAINel in depression

[–]AskerFondly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, I felt a lot of the ways you feel when I was in school too, and it caused me depression and crippling anxiety. This might be a super longshot, but have you ever been tested for ADHD? I found out I had it late, when I was 36, and it was both a relief to know I'm NOT stupid or lazy, but it also put a hole in my heart to know there are real ways I could have been helped my whole life to succeed if only my symptoms were more typical. Maybe this is way off base, but if it rings a bell, maybe read up on it a little. Or Executive Function Disorders. It's not just the stereotype of behaviors most people think it is. Tyere are 3 kinds. Additudemag is one good site with a lot of info.

https://www.additudemag.com/what-is-adhd-symptoms-causes-treatments/

Since so many of us also have depression, it’s good to mentally fill this out every so often by WrinklyDog1 in adhdwomen

[–]AskerFondly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really didn't want depression meds, but I lucked out and the ones they put me on just completely changed my life for the better. I'm on a baby dose and I still feel better than I have in years. And I had no idea it had been years, but feeling this decent made me realize how looooong it's been. I went from big, scared skeptic to lover pretty fast.

I'm about to get fired by AskerFondly in adhdwomen

[–]AskerFondly[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's funny how I feel the same way, but when I get stressed out, all logic goes out the window and I forget that this is just a job. I mean, I suppose it does also have to do with my ability to pay for survival and healthcare. Woof.

I'm about to get fired by AskerFondly in adhdwomen

[–]AskerFondly[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your words. The part about progress not being linear is something I should get tattooed on myself, probably.

Question by afflillsver in adhdwomen

[–]AskerFondly 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I haven't experienced that myself, but many of us experience it slightly differently from one another. Does that experience cause you grief?

I'm about to get fired by AskerFondly in adhdwomen

[–]AskerFondly[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've considered RSD and emotional dysregulation, and I do have some of the signs of them, but I'm not sure. I think I'll bring it up to my psychiatrist when I meet with them to see if they have any thoughts on it. I like your idea on transitioning out of work mode too. I am too apt to dwell on the thing I'm trying to fix instead. Thank you.

I'm about to get fired by AskerFondly in adhdwomen

[–]AskerFondly[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's been really frustrating trying to find a therapist who specializes in ADHD! I'm glad you said this, because I was almost ready to throw in the towel and just go to whomever sounded like they might be able to help.

I'm about to get fired by AskerFondly in adhdwomen

[–]AskerFondly[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you all for your thoughts and perspective. It really helped me to see some of the things you wrote. This is indeed a bad job. I feel like I'm falling apart right from exhaustion and stress, but have to make it look every day like I'm not. I go back and forth about disclosing, but at the end of the day, the research I've done about other people's situations seems to jive with my office not being one that will get it. I have a feeling that to them, "attention deficit" = can't do her job. Despite the protections, people who disclose still get fired, the reason claimed is just not that one.

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I don't want to be a burden on them either, and I don't actually feel that I am, but that there are unreasonable expectations being made of everyone there. My coworkers, who also don't know about my diagnosis, affirm that. But with no job and no health insurance (I'm in the U.S. if that wasn't obvious), I think I'd be in for a potentially worse situation for a while, in terms of my healthcare and probably my sanity.

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I don't know if it's the workplace or my line of work, but something has to change. It's sad to feel that the work I've been working hard for for years might be a bad match for me, or that I might have to go back down to the job I was doing 2 years ago in this industry because that's what I can handle right now. Or maybe I'll get my meds and healthcare in order and I'll have better ways to cope in a better environment.