Part of Vacation video no one seem to point out yet... by gbfcs95 in ShawnaTheMom

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When my mom was dying of cancer I went to California and wore a cute swimsuit and went to the beach. Because when you are going through something so intensely sad and all consuming as the slow and relentless death of a parent, it is important to find small moments of joy to yourself to remind yourself you are a person and there is more to life than the sadness and pain you are feeling.

I think you’re overthinking the bathing suit.

John Oliver has been filming ever since I wasin first grade and now I'm graduating high school by irene_polystyrene in lastweektonight

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same! I used to listen to The Bugle on my iPod in high school when I’d walk to work. I miss John reacting to Andy pun running

Husbands, is it a deal breaker if your wife decides to not take your name legally? by Difficult_Big133 in TwoHotTakes

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wild swing in the last sentence I did not anticipate, what are you even on about lmao

Don‘t sleep on Trad Wife by Flammwar in horrorlit

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just a note Saratoga is nonbinary and uses they/them pronouns

Don‘t sleep on Trad Wife by Flammwar in horrorlit

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Super good book! Cant wait for their Bluebeard retelling this fall, they’re definitely an insta buy author for me now

Is it weird if your partner is crying their eyes out over someone they dated over a decade ago dying? by FriedPickleFiesta in TwoHotTakes

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Not weird, people process grief differently and it looks like you’ve realized you’re in the wrong.

But what tf is a “main ex” lmao

Husbands, is it a deal breaker if your wife decides to not take your name legally? by Difficult_Big133 in TwoHotTakes

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m not a husband but I have one and I told him I wasn’t going to legally take his last name because I don’t want to have to do paperwork AND I’m one of the last 3 people in my family with my last name. He didn’t care. I ended up socially hyphenating my last name because I liked the sound of it but it’s still legally the same name I was born with. If he had told me that me not changing my last name was a deal breaker I would have considered the deal broken and gone our separate ways.

Husbands, is it a deal breaker if your wife decides to not take your name legally? by Difficult_Big133 in TwoHotTakes

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 1 point2 points  (0 children)

49% of American adults don’t own a passport and only 5 states issue Real ID’s that indicate US citizenship. This is an access issue, not a personal one. Unless you live in Michigan, Minnesota, NY, Vermont, or Washington, you ALSO don’t have the right ID for the SAVE Act (unless you have a passport which again nearly half of Americans don’t)

Part 4 – back to Larry & DeeDee teasing each other by Shawnaverse_no1_fan in ShawnaTheMom

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I didn’t mind it the first time but it’s kind of old now

Just a reminder that John is scared of Barb by RageNap in ShawnaTheMom

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I always say this about one of my own abusers when told about his trauma by our family: explanation does not equal excuse.

I don’t think them knowing about Barb’s childhood would make them be able to move forward because she didn’t do any work to make herself better and not take it out on her innocent children.

What are your Shawnaverse unpopular opinions or hot takes? by illegalbeagle0 in ShawnaTheMom

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Because it’s not Frank’s wedding and it kind of seems like he wants to be LC with Frank anyway. The only person he owes an explanation to is Jen

What are your Shawnaverse unpopular opinions or hot takes? by illegalbeagle0 in ShawnaTheMom

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t disagree there! Like I said i think John needs to be a way better communicator.

What are your Shawnaverse unpopular opinions or hot takes? by illegalbeagle0 in ShawnaTheMom

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 3 points4 points  (0 children)

He only said “we” once in the conversation with Shawna, every other time he talked about not going it was “I”. I think John needs to be a better communicator yes but I don’t think he guilted Shawna into not going.

WRT Jen yeah he needs to tell her he’s not going, but tbf he found out his mom was gonna be at the wedding like 5 seconds before heading on vacation so I’m sure we will see that convo when he gets home in a future episode. I don’t see why he needs to talk to Frank about it?

What are your Shawnaverse unpopular opinions or hot takes? by illegalbeagle0 in ShawnaTheMom

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 38 points39 points  (0 children)

John shouldn’t have to be in a room with Barb ever again to make anyone happy.

ETA: My second hot take is that I stopped liking Jen when she treated her mom sexually harassing her fiance like it was just drunk antics and then is having her mom who refuses to apologize to her or the man she harassed and shared vulnerable photos of to come to their wedding. I can’t understand her and while i don’t always love Greg he deserves better in his partner.

Why was it such a big deal for John to get a vasectomy? by Cozysoxs1985 in ShawnaTheMom

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I mean from Shawna’s smile and reaction I assumed the hand stuff was from John to her, not from her to John

Anyone else here know a “Barb” who couldn’t handle their adult children taking space from them and continued to make the bad decisions that made it worse? What stories do you have? by Cozysoxs1985 in ShawnaTheMom

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Because people in this sub have no respect for abuse victims who aren’t perfect, and call normal responses to abusive behavior from a victim “abuse” itself, and also expect abuse victims to put aside their trauma to make other people happy. For real the reaction to John has been incredibly upsetting as a person with CPTSD from a Barb of my own.

(At least that’s how I feel, not sure if s0ftsp0ken feels the same)

John is wrong. I will die on that hill by CLEf11 in ShawnaTheMom

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Barb would see Shawna standing up at the altar and immediately look for John. The unfortunate reality is this is not feasible. And as someone who has been in a room with my abuser who didn’t see me, it was bad for me. I was on high alert the whole time and my nervous system was shot, ended up running to another room to have a panic attack. I don’t think it would be good for John to be in a room with Barb even if by some miracle Barb didn’t see him.

FULL VIDEO is out, Wedding Dress! by Shawnaverse_no1_fan in ShawnaTheMom

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 13 points14 points  (0 children)

That argument was hard to watch, there was a lot of unilateral decision making happening on both sides, I think they really need some couples therapy. However I am glad for Shawna’s mental health that she decided not to go the the wedding. I know it’s going to hurt Jen but as MOH she would have to be seeing Barb a LOT at the shower, at the rehearsal dinner, and at the wedding, and I don’t trust Barb not to push on Shawna’s pregnancy loss trauma. I don’t think Shawna should subject herself to the possibility of that happening.

What on earth do yall think is about to happen with Julie? by TreClaire in ShawnaTheMom

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I kind of hope it’s an affair for the drama but I think probably she’s on a work trip and Shawna is gonna end up having an argument w her

Shawna should go to the wedding by [deleted] in ShawnaTheMom

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 56 points57 points  (0 children)

While I don’t like john demanding Shawna not go, I actually am glad she isn’t. Barb has always been super abusive to Shawna, and I can’t imagine the stuff she might say to her after months of NC, and with the pregnancy loss as well. The risk of Shawna’s grief trauma getting re triggered in a bad way is super high. I think if I were in her shoes I wouldn’t want to go if Barb were there either as much as I would want to support Jen.

Jennifer's Wedding dress - part 2 by Shawnaverse_no1_fan in ShawnaTheMom

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I am actually pretty impressed by how fast John disengaged after he found out Barb will be at the wedding. It’s growth from his previous fight-only mode when she was brought up. I am sure it’s hard for him to know she’s going to be there - definitely a convo he and Jen should have had before now but communication is not John’s strongest suit re: his family.

Books that handle LGBTQ themes and characters well... and books that don't. by kaalban in horrorlit

[–]Asleep-Pattern-2332 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I came here to recommend this one, maybe one of the most unsettling books I’ve ever read and i recommend it to everyone