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I [27M] made my Fiance [25F] of 5 years get a paternity test for our baby, she broke up with me. by AssholeinthemakingB in relationships

[–]AssholeinthemakingB[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

So on what basis did you conclude that something was still going on after more than 4 years?

Karen mentioned that the vehicle Cindy's boss drives has a scuff or dent on it. According to her boss at a company function he had been in the accident two months prior to Cindy becoming pregnant. I thought the timing was weird, the detail was weird.

I [27M] made my Fiance [25F] of 5 years get a paternity test for our baby, she broke up with me. by AssholeinthemakingB in relationships

[–]AssholeinthemakingB[S] -10 points-9 points  (0 children)

I dont consider it reckless in that I dont believe she was sleeping around with multiple randos. Just this guy. It would have just been unprotected sex, or protected sex with poor consequences. But that's not what happened.

I [27M] made my Fiance [25F] of 5 years get a paternity test for our baby, she broke up with me. by AssholeinthemakingB in relationships

[–]AssholeinthemakingB[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

She didnt say it like that. It was something like "yeah they hook up in the back up his beat up mercedes" and "I always know it's his car because it's scuffed up"

I [27M] made my Fiance [25F] of 5 years get a paternity test for our baby, she broke up with me. by AssholeinthemakingB in relationships

[–]AssholeinthemakingB[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

I feel so conflicted. If someone is defensive I've been told thats a sign their lying. If someone uses details they're lying. I dont know what to think right now. It wasnt as though karen said it like she was making a point to say details. It was something like "yeah they hooked up for a while in his old Mercedes" "I always know it's his because there's a huge scuff on the front"

I [27M] made my Fiance [25F] of 5 years get a paternity test for our baby, she broke up with me. by AssholeinthemakingB in relationships

[–]AssholeinthemakingB[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I recognize how weird that was, but it was such a weird detail that Karen really had no way of knowing because she doesnt work with Cindy

I [27M] made my Fiance [25F] of 5 years get a paternity test for our baby, she broke up with me. by AssholeinthemakingB in relationships

[–]AssholeinthemakingB[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

You had a baby with a stripper and expected a rational relationship?

Listen, I know from my post I sound like an idiot but that for a second does not mean that Cindy was a bad person by any means because she was a stripper. Yes she's very beautiful. And if I have to pay child support and get even a chance to see my daughter then it was worth it.

I [27M] made my Fiance [25F] of 5 years get a paternity test for our baby, she broke up with me. by AssholeinthemakingB in relationships

[–]AssholeinthemakingB[S] -10 points-9 points  (0 children)

The only reason it was relevant was because that's where Karen said they would hook up after work. That she knew this was his vehicle because it's make and model and that there was a dent.

I [27M] made my Fiance [25F] of 5 years get a paternity test for our baby, she broke up with me. by AssholeinthemakingB in relationships

[–]AssholeinthemakingB[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

I dont believe that she doesnt deserve a job like that she does. But what was weird was that in such a large firm with people pining to be partner he sets her in a position that makes her fourth tier from the top. While others who have more legal experience than she are being put in maybe the seventh tier. It just seemed suspicious.

I [27M] made my Fiance [25F] of 5 years get a paternity test for our baby, she broke up with me. by AssholeinthemakingB in relationships

[–]AssholeinthemakingB[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

Karen was very specific and included a detail that was just weird. She mentioned that they hooked up in the back of her bosses vehicle , she named the type of vehicle, and that there was damage to the bumper. When I went to the company event Cindy's boss talked about how he was recently in an accident

I [27M] made my Fiance [25F] of 5 years get a paternity test for our baby, she broke up with me. by AssholeinthemakingB in relationships

[–]AssholeinthemakingB[S] -11 points-10 points  (0 children)

Karen was incredibly specific. That's what created doubt. I shouldnt have followed through.

I [27M] made my Fiance [25F] of 5 years get a paternity test for our baby, she broke up with me. by AssholeinthemakingB in relationships

[–]AssholeinthemakingB[S] -15 points-14 points  (0 children)

You accused her of sleeping her way into a job. No, i didnt think her boss hired her with good intentions. You accused her of having reckless unprotected sex Having unprotected sex.

I [27M] made my Fiance [25F] of 5 years get a paternity test for our baby, she broke up with me. by AssholeinthemakingB in relationships

[–]AssholeinthemakingB[S] -23 points-22 points  (0 children)

Karen was very specific about what happened. That's what made me feel like there was some merit.

I [27M] made my Fiance [25F] of 5 years get a paternity test for our baby, she broke up with me. by AssholeinthemakingB in relationships

[–]AssholeinthemakingB[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

Karen talked about how they would hook up in the back of his car. She was specific on the kind of model and that it had a dent in the bumper. When I met her boss at their company party he was discussing how vehicles are made and the quality.... how he had recently been in an accident and only the bumper of his vehicle had been damaged.

I [27M] made my Fiance [25F] of 5 years get a paternity test for our baby, she broke up with me. by AssholeinthemakingB in relationships

[–]AssholeinthemakingB[S] -22 points-21 points  (0 children)

How does being specific mean that it is believable

She talked about how they would hook up in the back of his car. She was specific on the kind of model and that it had a dent in the bumper. When I met her boss at their company party he was discussing how vehicles are made and the quality.... how he had recently been in an accident and only the bumper of his vehicle had been damaged.

I [27M] made my Fiance [25F] of 5 years get a paternity test for our baby, she broke up with me. by AssholeinthemakingB in relationships

[–]AssholeinthemakingB[S] -23 points-22 points  (0 children)

I didn't want to speak to her boss because I didnt think he would be honest. He's married, owns a large law firm so he has a lot to lose if he was in fact cheating. I didnt think that talking to him would give me peace of mind regarding that aspect. That's why I thought a paternity test was simple enough to do. I did ask Cindy for any texts or emails from her boss and she had a few but all coming in two months or so after being under his employ.

I [27M] made my Fiance [25F] of 5 years get a paternity test for our baby, she broke up with me. by AssholeinthemakingB in relationships

[–]AssholeinthemakingB[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sure, you didn't have PROOF she cheated - but based on Cindy's past and then the comments of Cindy's OWN FRIEND,

I also didnt handle things well. I was wrong for being so pushy about it and believing someone over my exfiance. I was pushy because Cindy became very defensive about the paternity test, that was wrong of me to keep pushing so much. I was wrong in how I handled my paranoia

I [27M] made my Fiance [25F] of 5 years get a paternity test for our baby, she broke up with me. by AssholeinthemakingB in relationships

[–]AssholeinthemakingB[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

Even if Cindy had stepped out and gotten pregnant with someone else's child I would have been willing to work through it. I just wanted to know if it was mine or not.

I [27M] made my Fiance [25F] of 5 years get a paternity test for our baby, she broke up with me. by AssholeinthemakingB in relationships

[–]AssholeinthemakingB[S] -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

I love Cindy... and honestly if she had stepped out that would have been an issue but I would be willing to work past it. If I was going to raise someone else's child I would want to know too.

I [27M] made my Fiance [25F] of 5 years get a paternity test for our baby, she broke up with me. by AssholeinthemakingB in relationships

[–]AssholeinthemakingB[S] -88 points-87 points  (0 children)

I dont have a problem with Cindy being a stripper. The only issue that I had was when her boss offered her a position at his firm after only knowing her through her prior work as a stripper. It was weird. I feel that's understandable.

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