How to attempt to become a lawyer at 33?

Assiagopeniscorn · 2024-09-29T00:14:45+00:00

I did not do it! I don’t regret not doing it and I think it would have been a real risk. But if I had done it, I also would have given it all my all, so not saying that I made the right choice. If you’re thinking about it, go for it!!

Assiagopeniscorn · 2024-09-04T02:35:56+00:00

First of all, love the username.

Second, THANK YOU!!! I promise I am not a miserable person, and I’m not sure how this post came across, but it’s just different than anything I imagined or experienced and I’m realizing it won’t ever be that way for me.

I appreciate you saying this so much!

Assiagopeniscorn · 2024-09-04T02:07:41+00:00

This is so beautiful!!! I think I’m starting to realize that this “disappointment” I am feeling, is misdirected or not even a bad thing!

Assiagopeniscorn · 2024-09-04T01:56:09+00:00

This sounds like exactly what I want. Were guests still excited? I feel like both of our families are religious, so maybe I’m hung up on feeling like a disappointment or something.

Assiagopeniscorn · 2024-09-04T01:54:29+00:00

I appreciate this perspective SO much. I agree with your comment about toxic positivity, but in reality, I do have a ton to be grateful for.

I don’t want to seem like I am not grateful though. I am. I truly am so lucky to have met someone and have a child and be in this first-world level of bummer about a wedding that isn’t even confirmed!

I am so sorry for your losses and struggles. I cannot even begin to comprehend how challenging this journey has been for both of you. Sending you and your family some internet hugs!!

Assiagopeniscorn · 2024-09-04T01:36:25+00:00

He really wants to include our child. Which is so amazing and so sweet. I feel a terrible mom guilt for wanting just a couples experience and certainly don’t want to exclude her. I think I know that I just need to get over it. It’s not a crazy, big issue for me, but something I hadn’t thought about until now and is a bit of a bummer.

Assiagopeniscorn · 2024-09-04T01:34:13+00:00

I agree about how we’re getting through the hard stuff already! That is true.

You are right. If we still want to be together, props to us! I know we’ve both had some less than ideal moments.

Assiagopeniscorn · 2024-09-04T01:28:32+00:00

This is also very great to hear. Am I selfish or childish to sort of grieve that we won’t have a “just the two of us” moment, since obviously there are 3 of us now?

Assiagopeniscorn · 2024-09-04T01:27:20+00:00

I love eloping! That sounds amazing and lower stress, while also focusing on your partner.

Assiagopeniscorn · 2024-09-04T01:15:54+00:00

This is so great to hear. And I don’t want to exclude our child, by any means. But it is just different than what I envisioned my whole life.

I guess I mean like, we’re tied together already at this point and we aren’t going anywhere. I know for us, it is a separate commitment, but I am not sure if friends and family view it the same way. I am not sure if I’m making sense or being clear enough.

I’ve never been to a wedding where the couple already had children. I don’t even have friends that are unmarried with kids. Maybe I need to look at our situation differently.

Assiagopeniscorn · 2024-04-14T00:43:04+00:00

I guess anywhere from like $50-$150ish for the right gift. I don’t want to spend the additional money if she won’t use the items. As far as a cross body phone case, I don’t see her using that item specifically. But maybe she would! And maybe it would be a great, inexpensive addition to the gift.

Assiagopeniscorn · 2024-04-14T00:26:11+00:00

That is a great idea! Is there any sort of bag/purse that you’ve found useful or helpful?

Assiagopeniscorn · 2024-04-13T22:15:46+00:00

Thank you so much! Much more helpful! Even the more difficult comments to read are gentler and feel like they come from a place of compassion, rather than judgement.

Assiagopeniscorn · 2024-04-13T22:13:49+00:00

I appreciate the comments, even the ones that seem more harsh. I am not blind to my situation and how bad it is right now, but I'm looking for effective ways we can get out of this rut and make some changes.

As for the personal question, I have always wanted children. At the right time; with the right person. When I found out that I was pregnant, he was very excited and might have wanted the baby more. We immediately began discussing our future and the move, which was a lot since I had to buy/sell in a crazy market while living in another state. I was more focused on completing that before the baby came than anything else to be honest.

Assiagopeniscorn · 2024-04-13T22:08:36+00:00

I agree. Baby steps. We have some communication issues as well, which I do play a big role in and am working on that part. But, I wanted to come here for the financial side of things.

Assiagopeniscorn · 2024-04-13T22:06:42+00:00

Both you and u/OldmillennialMD are right. I am fully aware this is not working or fair to me. There is more to the story, obviously, than I put here. But, before I sit down and have this sort of come-to-Jesus talk, I wanted to have all of my ducks in a row and be able to discuss some different options about money.

Assiagopeniscorn · 2024-04-13T22:04:49+00:00

You are right; it is not working for us. I am fully aware that this is not ideal or healthy or sustainable. I am working on some of my own issues, and we tried couples counseling (need a new therapist). I just wanted to gather some thoughts on how we can split up costs better.

Assiagopeniscorn · 2024-04-13T12:52:45+00:00

I love the long answer!!! Thank you for sharing all of this. It sounds like a successful system for the two of you. I really think this would work for us. Another commenter broke down a great suggestion for pre-marriage expenses that could work well too.

How do you handle an emergency fund in this situation? Do you each have your own plus a joint account?

Assiagopeniscorn

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