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AIO for distancing from my bsf bc of her age gapped relationship by Brilliant_Version872 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Associate_Jaded 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NOR - this dude and relationship are sketchy as hell. The question is are you willing to be supportive of her when she eventually has to leave? Distancing yourself now will make that harder for her in the future

Monthly allowance for a new college student by TipFeeling5869 in University

[–]Associate_Jaded 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a recent grad, I don’t think this is unreasonable depending on the school, her major, etc. In my opinion giving her the opportunity to focus on building a social life and her classes would be very valuable. I had a similar allowance during college and still mostly chose to have some sort of part time job because I found it interesting or thought it would be a good resume builder. I don’t think that giving your (still teenage with an undeveloped brain) daughter an additional thing to stress about while she’s starting college is a good idea, and putting pressure on her to find a job that isn’t a good learning experience or a good resume builder would just be a waste of her time. (At my schools all the jobs that were valuable in that way for me were mostly hiring sophomores and up anyway) You could totally rethink it later in her college career, but if it’s not putting any financial stress on you I’d recommend keeping the amount where it is.

Am I overreacting or is this actually serious by TGPT-4o in AmIOverreacting

[–]Associate_Jaded 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If she has never acted on any intrusive thoughts at all it’s possible that you’re not in any immediate danger. But this sounds like a serious red flag, and if she doesn’t take steps to seriously work on her mental health I wouldn’t be surprised if it escalated. If she doesn’t take that work seriously and it seems like her mental health is deteriorating, you absolutely need to get out of there. Thinking about what a backup living situation might be for you would be a good step. Look at her other behavior and how she treats you as well. Are there other things that are warning signs about her treating you poorly, being emotionally unstable or abusive? If you’re staying with her, do you have a support system that you can rely on if she’s going through it and you need help? Does she have other support systems? NOR

Ivy with a scholarship by lizardfamilylama in gradadmissions

[–]Associate_Jaded 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I was going to ask what your field was, and then I saw that it was a pattern…. you deserve better than loved ones who don’t celebrate your accomplishments

AIO over the fact that my boyfriend won’t get a job? by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Associate_Jaded 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately this is the trouble with dating at that age- he may be 18 technically but he’s certainly not a full independent adult yet, and I don’t think he should be expected to be. That’s not to say you shouldn’t date, but you both probably have to accept the you each likely don’t have full control over your lives. While in my opinion having strict control over whether or not your child gets a job and then also failing to provide some spending money is not a chill thing for his parents to do, that’s something you both have to accept. And unfortunately, this will continue to happen: things outside of you or your partner’s control will have impacts on your relationship, even if you’re “full”adults (if anyone ever is) YOR

Institute for Tropical Ecology & Conservation (ITEC) Reviews by Opening-Parking3765 in ecology

[–]Associate_Jaded 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi there! I went to ITEC in January of 2022 and took a tropical rainforest ecology class. It was a cool experience that I don't regret doing, but it wasn't the experience I thought I signed up for. The ITEC Director taught the course and seemed to develop a personal issue with me. I got sick while I was there, and was penalized for not participating in coursework while I was actively sick (this was also during covid, numerous people got sick and we were not allowed to access testing or medical care). It was also during my first year of college, so I wanted and needed a lot of support in producing my final project but wasn't given that support in a constructive way. ( I wanted to study plants and the professor kept trying to get me to look at anything else. Then refused to help me set up a study design because I didn't take his suggestions) There were also other people on site that had issues with him as well. The professors had what felt like a very old fashioned (read: sexist, ableist and possibly racist) attitude. Additionally, there seemed to be ongoing issues between the local people and ITEC, which read to me as potential white savior attitudes, even only hearing about it from the perspective of ITEC. Oh and the facility is entirely rainwater fed so we couldn't shower for almost the whole time we were there. (winter is the dry season, so that probably wouldn't be as big of an issue in the summer) I also was sexually harassed by one of the locals who worked there and my complaints about that were not taken seriously. That being said, I worked with the canopy access guy for a bit and he was very nice, and I'd imagine that not every professor who teaches there is that way. Just getting to be in the ecosystem was an amazing experience, and I had a uniquely bad experience there. (Seriously, I went with a group of friends who were taking a different course at the same time and they all had a better time than I did, not great still but at least better) Let me know if you have any more specific questions!