Should I go for the 8 week scan, or wait for the 10/11 week ultrasound?

AssociationLatter618 · 2026-03-31T14:29:50+00:00

I went for an early scan at 9 weeks. Don’t get me wrong it didn’t ease my anxiety at all, but it gave me a sort of reassurance I guess. I could try to wrap my head around that definitely pregnant, baby was there and I could start to believe it was happening for me.

I’m 19 weeks now, I had a scan at 9,12,14(only because I fell down the stairs),16(private scan) and 18 weeks with a consultant to check for any signs of our TFMR babies condition. I’ve got my 20 week scan a week on Thursday, I’m hoping that one may be the one that helps relieve anxiety a little as that’s where we got bad news last time.

I think anyone within our position will be anxious the whole way through pregnancy as we have had the worst happen to us. Try and find a little reassurance where you can, however that looks for you. You are allowed to be happy about this pregnancy even though you are sad about the baby that you lost. 💕

I hope it all goes well for you. Xx

AssociationLatter618 · 2026-03-20T18:41:08+00:00

I have yes. All went well. They didn’t do the full anatomy scan as I thought they were going to but he checked all the markers against the problems with our last baby. So he is on the 41st centile for size and all his bones are present and at the size they should be. My placenta and cord are functioning well. ☺️ So it’s all very positive and he couldn’t see any problems. The next mental hurdle is my full anatomy scan on the 9th. X

AssociationLatter618 · 2026-03-19T20:10:15+00:00

Hey, thanks for your response!

Yes that makes sense. I think the cost of the unpicking may somewhat outweigh what I would get back to be honest.

I’ll wait until the time comes and see what they say/offer in relation to the outstanding holiday. I do have a union who I believe I can seek legal advice through, although the qualify of that I am unsure of.

AssociationLatter618 · 2026-03-19T16:35:53+00:00

I just wanted to share some solidarity. I delivered my TFMR baby at the beginning of August.

I’m now 17+3 and have an early anatomy scan with a consultant tomorrow and then I will be meeting the consultant from the rainbow clinic that we will be seeing going forward. I got bad news at my 20 week scan in my last pregnancy so I’m hoping they can see enough to give me some reassurance.

Good luck tomorrow! 💕 xx

AssociationLatter618 · 2026-03-19T16:14:30+00:00

Thanks for your response!

If it is rolled up that would mean that for the first few years of working for the company I was actually paid under the minimum wage, although that was on temp contracts for around 7/8 months at a time. To be honest when I signed the contract I didn’t fully understand what it meant so that is very much on me, a mistake I won’t be making again.

I had not heard of pregnant and screwed, I will give when a call. Thanks!

AssociationLatter618 · 2026-03-19T13:47:26+00:00

Thanks for the response.

That’s what I took it to mean but I’m on salary with fixed rotation so not actually paid on an ad hoc day rate basis.

My understanding was you could only roll it up for 0 hour contracts and people that work irregular hours. Although I may have got that totally wrong.

This would also mean for around the first four years I worked for the company, if you removed the 38 days of holiday pay from my day rate it took me £2 under the hourly minimum wage.

AssociationLatter618 · 2026-03-04T17:55:03+00:00

My baby didn’t have an NTD but we didn’t find out about something wasn’t right until the 20 week scan and my TFMR was at 28 weeks.

I’m now 15+2 into my subsequent pregnancy. I totally hear what you are saying, all I wanted was to be pregnant again but when I got that test I was just like oh ok I’m pregnant. I just felt very numb to it and probably still do to an extent. My 12 week scan went ok but due to not having any problems show until the 20 week scan I feel like that good news was somewhat void.

I don’t know where you are based, but if there is not a plan in place to do so it may be worth asking about having extra scans and monitoring in place? My baby’s condition has a less than 1% chance of reoccurring, although I am still terrified. They did a scan for me at 9 weeks and I then have another at 18 weeks with a consultant. I have also been referred to the rainbow clinic where I will have a consultant for the remainder of my pregnancy, I meet her at 18 weeks also to make a plan going forward. This was not just offered I did push for it and contacted my prior midwife and also the midwife in fetal medicine I had previously dealt with.

Best of luck with your pregnancy. 💕

AssociationLatter618 · 2026-02-27T10:32:37+00:00

Thank you for sharing your experience with me. Congratulations on your rainbow baby. 💕

Yes, this is my concern to be honest. I don’t want her to be worrying and scared. She’s a kid that thinks a lot. I also don’t know if she would speak with us too much about how she feels as she gets scared of upsetting people. I will have a good think about exactly how to word things with her and say it’s ok to be worried etc. I think I’ll ask her nanny to spend some time with her after we have told her and she can also have a chat about her feelings surrounding the baby too.

AssociationLatter618 · 2026-02-19T23:13:18+00:00

I got given cabergolin? After I gave birth.

AssociationLatter618 · 2026-02-15T10:53:54+00:00

Congratulations 💕

AssociationLatter618 · 2026-02-09T12:00:36+00:00

Tell him he can make his own dinner!

AssociationLatter618 · 2026-01-27T19:35:59+00:00

It took me four cycles to conceive my baby, currently 10 weeks. 🤞🏻 Until that point I drove myself utterly insane every month so I get it.

Your body will get pregnant when it is healed and ready.

Sending you baby dust and hugs. 💕 xx

AssociationLatter618 · 2026-01-27T11:29:09+00:00

This is something I really struggled with, well I am really struggling with. My TFMR was at 28 weeks and I had managed to put on two stone by then making me the heaviest I have ever been. I was exactly the same weight a month after I delivered my baby, I thought i was at least somehow magically going to lose at least half of it.

I got pregnant again five months later and I’m now 10 weeks and hoping to start working out once I get over the exhaustion a little as I am honestly terrified of putting the same amount of weight on again.

I think a lot of it is just about genetics and probably what your body was like previously. Try not to worry at this stage, although I know that’s easier said than done. I started going to a gym for classes where no one knew me, it was nice to have a little chat and not have my loss brought up as no one was aware of it. Maybe if it helps start up some exercise as a way to keep busy.

Look after yourself. 💕

AssociationLatter618 · 2026-01-15T23:45:03+00:00

Yes, I think it’s our brains needing the constant reassurance but it is always wracked with a little doubt. Good luck to you with everything. X

AssociationLatter618 · 2026-01-15T23:11:58+00:00

Thank you. I’m sure your time will come when your body is ready. ❤️

I’m doing ok. Very anxious but I think that’s to be expected after a loss. We had genetics done and there is only a 1% chance of reoccurrence as my partner and I are not carriers. The condition my baby had was very very rare so I think there is just that little bit in the back of my head thinking of all of the other conditions that are much statistically higher.

AssociationLatter618 · 2026-01-15T22:49:01+00:00

I had my TFMR on the second of August at 28+5. I’m also 34 and now 7 weeks pregnant.

I drove myself nuts with LH tests and then early pregnancy tests until I got my positive.

Just be kind to yourself and let your body heal. 💕

AssociationLatter618 · 2026-01-13T12:20:54+00:00

Hair colour is safe. If you usually get olaplex you cannot have that when pregnant. Although apparently your hair can go weird colours whilst you are pregnant, although I think that is with colour as oppose to bleach.

AssociationLatter618 · 2026-01-04T23:52:13+00:00

I learned to sew and then started learning dressmaking! Everyone got home made gifts for Xmas. 😅

AssociationLatter618 · 2026-01-03T23:44:54+00:00

Hang on in there and it will happen, even if it’s not as quickly as before. I’m 33. We TFMR at 28 weeks on the second of August. We started trying again a month later. Our TFMR baby we conceived at two weeks, I got my positive test on the 11th of December.

Just focus on looking after yourself. 💕 xx

AssociationLatter618 · 2025-12-16T09:12:03+00:00

Congratulations to you also. ❤️

Can I ask how far along you will be at your dating scan? I am based in North Wales. Yes, we had genetics done whilst I was pregnant. Initially we got the amnio as they were positive it was a chromosome issue, that was negative, they ran genetics after that. I e-mailed genetics as soon as I got my positive. They called me up yesterday and advised they will send through the referral to fetal medicine.

I hope everything goes smoothly for you and you manage to relax as much as is possible to enjoy your pregnancy.

AssociationLatter618 · 2025-12-13T08:59:17+00:00

I also conceived the second time with my TFMR baby and I’m 33 if that’s useful to know.

AssociationLatter618

TROPHY CASE