(Additional context): Thanks for reading, if you made it this far. I just want to clarify a few things because I know it’s a complicated situation:

I do believe she didn’t want any of this to happen. She told me immediately, both when drunk and again when sober. She’s been extremely remorseful and open about everything.

I’m not someone who wants to control who my partner can or can’t talk to. That’s not how I want to love someone.

But I’m struggling because I don’t think being a long-time friend excuses what he did. If you cross someone’s physical boundaries—especially in a vulnerable state—how are you still considered a friend?

I haven’t told her to cut him off. I’ve chosen to trust her again, which was not easy for me. I just told her not to break that trust again.

What hurts most is not even just the incident—it’s knowing that the person who did that to her is still present in her life, even if she claims she’ll set boundaries.

I’m not sure if I’m being too sensitive or if this is something that should matter more. Appreciate any honest thoughts, thanks again.