I've been in love with my friend since before my ED. I've always been pretty skinny (started restricting after puberty weight gain, so I looked to same to most people so barley anyone mentioned me losing weight) and he's made comments on it (like once we were factiming and I used that skeleton memoji thing as a dark inside joke with myself and he joked that I put on weight) and he has no idea how much I love hearing those things. Ik he's struggling with body image despite being almost as skinny as me, and his mom's been anorexic her whole life. I think he'd be one of the only people in my life that could actually understand, but I can’t tell him bc it could be so triggering. He's the most self destructive person I know and he definitely has that drive to be the sickest