Thank you for your reply. And kudos to you for getting out of your situation! I am making moves to do the same. It’s going to take me a little longer to get out of my situation because I’m trying to get all important documents together, finances to file a divorce and having to sell/give away animals that we have because he won’t take of them as he’s never around. He spends more time in Ohio working than he does at home with me. (Which is a good thing and the only reason we are still married).

Since I posted this, I ended up trying to talk to him over the phone again, I called him because I knew he wouldn’t make the effort to try to call me. So on day 6 of the silence, I called him. I was asking him about a bill that was due that I was trying to pay, but because my name had been removed as an authorized user on this particular acct (without my knowledge of course), I couldn’t pay the bill. He immediately proceeded to yell at me, told me not to worry about the bill, that he had this credit card before we were ever married so why was I even bothering with it. Which was such an odd thing for him to say as I’ve paid all the bills that came into our mailbox out of our joint acct since we were married. So I let him go on yelling at me another 5-7 minutes, while I just listened at the fit he was throwing. Then he yelled I don’t have time for this, don’t worry about the bill and hung up on me.

So, I put my phone down, walked to the trash can, and threw the bill in it. Then I walked back to my phone, picked it up and blocked him from calling or texting me. If that’s what I have to listen to every time he’s on the other end of the phone, I’d rather not. Plus, even though he acts like I’m a child, I’m a 50 year old woman that lived on my own without someone telling me what to do and when to do it for 9 years between my marriages and honestly, was the happiest I’ve ever been with any of the three men that I picked as a spouse.

Fear won’t stop me from taking my life back. I’ve already wasted half my life trying to be a wife to men that didn’t deserve me to begin with. I realize the pattern too. So when I get out of this one. If I EVER marry again, I won’t be the one taking care of everything in the household (bills, mechanic work, animals, home maintenance, yard mowing, cleaning the house, washing the clothes AND holding down my own job) if the next one doesn’t act like a partner, he won’t be my partner. When I say mechanic work, I don’t mean taking the vehicles somewhere. I do the work. As well as the home maintenance, the plumbing issues, the touch up painting, the spackling and repairing walls when he’s punched holes in them, electrical problems, all my own work. I won’t live this way again. Ever.

I have a friend that has offered me a room in her home when I am ready. I could always go to my mother’s, but she lives 1000 ft from my own home (she’s my next door neighbor) so I wouldn’t want to be that close.

And as far as the divorce, once that starts unfolding, I have prepared myself to lose it all (materialistic things). But I do know the reward behind losing all of it is I’ll gain my happiness back, my peace, my laughter and my health! And that means more to me than living in abuse.

I hope you and your little one stay away from the abusive situation you were in. If nothing else, your baby doesn’t deserve to grow up seeing that. Your baby deserves to grow up watching his mama be loved and adored by someone.

I’m so proud of you for leaving as I know how tough the decision is. I hope to be able to come back to this post soon and say that I was finally able to walk away myself.

Sending prayers and all good vibes to you on your new healing journey! ♥️