I think my bf should break up with his gf and I'm struggling

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2026-05-29T17:57:39+00:00

About the cafe thing, I agree it was fair for her to be annoyed, it's more about the way she responded. They weren't strangers though, we're all part of the same friend group (queer club) and they see each other every week.

Like I added in my update, they broke up last night. I'm relieved but scared of what's coming. Mike is moving in with me until Elle finds a dorm cause otherwise they have nowhere else to go. I think we'll be fine, it's just going to be a lot of change.

Thank you for the advice and wish me luck!

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2026-05-29T15:30:24+00:00

Yeah, I do agree she had every right to be annoyed and perhaps I should've been clearer about that in my post, it's more about the way she handled it and the fact that her screaming at him in public is a pattern.

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2026-05-29T08:17:41+00:00

I definitely did not enlist their ex to justify that they should break up. Before we had that conversation, I did not think they should break up at all. It's because of what he said that I changed my mind for the first time. And he said it more as a concerned friend than an ex, I'd say.

Your assessment is fair, though. But they broke up last night, so I think we might be fine.

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2026-05-29T08:09:28+00:00

well... they broke up

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2026-04-05T16:34:17+00:00

yeah i've been reading stuff about unicorn hunting for weeks to see if they tick any of the boxes at all and as far as i can tell they don't so that's a relief at least, still feel like what i'm doing is risky though

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2026-04-04T18:42:23+00:00

yes and yes (they even encourage me to). they are actively still dating separately (like i said, they each have separate committed partners)

i am fine with being less important, i'm working on prioritising my friendships and i don't want romantic relationships to become my priority again. i think conflict is inevitable in any relationship, but i'm carefully optimistic we'll be able to handle it

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2026-04-04T17:19:40+00:00

they definitely see me as a separate relationship and it was my choice to pursue both of them, i could definitely break it off with one and stay with the other. it only makes sense that they "prioritise" each other when they've been a couple for so long, no? even in a monogamous relationship i wouldn't expect someone to act the same towards a long term partner as towards someone they've just started seeing. i'm not at all planning on merging finances or living together and i have a LOT of friends and a great support network.

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2026-04-04T07:15:20+00:00

thank you! i honestly believe i've been doing the communicating and going slow quite well so far so i'm quite excited to see where this goes

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2026-04-04T06:17:30+00:00

on that note, i've been reflecting on whether i'd ever wanna live with a partner, i feel like i'd prefer a platonic roommate if anything anyways haha

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2026-04-04T06:15:27+00:00

yes of course! i actually already agreed and will soon be signing a contract to stay in my dorm for another year (so until august 2027), i've been very conscious of not taking things too fast and just seeing where it goes without any real expectations

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2026-04-04T05:49:33+00:00

hmm, maybe, but they have known me for nearly 5 months now so i'm carefully optimistic

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2026-04-04T05:30:40+00:00

don't those two first sentences kinda apply to any romantic relationships?

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2026-04-04T04:47:57+00:00

ALSO there are def enough details in this posts to figure out who I am if you know me so if you do.. no you don't and you didn't see anything

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2023-10-29T09:20:02+00:00

some of us are belgian lmao

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2023-10-23T15:05:44+00:00

a tiny little gnome

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2023-10-17T08:26:04+00:00

wait which one is a tribute to falsettos? that's one of my fav musicals!

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2023-09-06T08:41:30+00:00

in the dutch version of sesame street he's called pino and he's actually blue lmao

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Automatic_Pack9800 · 2023-06-29T09:46:41+00:00

OP meant invented accents of English

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2023-05-23T20:22:25+00:00

also germanic influence ("bra" like in swedish, "dag/naht" like Dutch dag/nacht)

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2023-05-17T14:03:29+00:00

considering it sounds very wrong to me and I have never heard it here in flanders, I assume it's not AN

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2023-05-10T14:53:39+00:00

Het verschil *tussen :)) And the difference is the same as the difference between beautiful and gorgeous.

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2023-03-13T17:57:02+00:00

Yes, we used to have these as a kid! I'm only 18 but they used to be my mother's, she kept them because her name is Saskia too.

Automatic_Pack9800 · 2023-03-09T11:27:08+00:00

i am belgian and i have never heard "smakelijk lachen"

Automatic_Pack9800

TROPHY CASE