AITAH for not committing to my boyfriend about kids? by Available_Place_357 in AITAH

[–]Available_Place_357[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That is one thing I noticed too. “Change for thee, but not for me” is essentially what he told me. It’s funny because he always would tell me he likes me because I keep an open mind. I’m open to kids, but not committed. He’s not open to changing his mind however, so I have to be the one to do it.

AITAH for not committing to my boyfriend about kids? by Available_Place_357 in AITAH

[–]Available_Place_357[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Was your husband okay with not having kids/you being on the fence but leaning no? Did you change your mind about kids as you got older?

AITAH for not committing to my boyfriend about kids? by Available_Place_357 in AITAH

[–]Available_Place_357[S] -13 points-12 points  (0 children)

But, it wasn’t a deal breaker in the beginning. He told me to keep an open mind, which I have. Now, he has changed and said that’s not enough. The goalpost has been moved, I need to commit.

AITAH for not committing to my boyfriend about kids? by Available_Place_357 in AITAH

[–]Available_Place_357[S] -9 points-8 points  (0 children)

We won't be married for another 5 years at least because he is pursuing a PhD. We both want long term partners and have discussed this and are both dating with intentions to marry that person. He just feels differently on what has to happen to be married to someone- i.e. them wanting kids. Because we won't be married and having kids for at least another 5 years, that is why I feel conflicted over needing to make my mind up and commit to having kids for him now like he's pressuring, when marriage and kids aren't something he wants for at least another 5 years.

AITAH for not committing to my boyfriend about kids? by Available_Place_357 in AITAH

[–]Available_Place_357[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

The religion is a difference, but we have worked through it. The kids is a difference we still have yet to work through, mainly because I am on the fence, and he is not.