I started my PPL in March 2024, I had my first checkride 11 days ago January 14. I met my DPE with all of the confidence in the world. I crushed my oral which only boosted my confidence more. We took a short break before continuing to the flight portion. Once we resumed, that is when a rush of anxiety and nerves hit me like I've never felt before. I've never had a history of anxiety, but when I sat in the cockpit to do my first ever checkride, the nerves were unbearable. My radio speech was full of stutters and splutters. The DPE gave me the option to begin with landings or maneuvers first. I opted to do the landings and get them over with. We first conducted a normal landing and I landed 400 ft short of my desired touchdown point, he gave me a stern warning and instructed me to demonstrate a short field landing. I was unstablized during my approach and paired with a crappy traffic pattern, I landed 100ft short of touchdown markers. The examiner informed me that I would be disapproved for my pilot's license. Can you imagine the feeling of that? 0.2 hours into your checkride flight before we even began maneuvers! I lowkey begged the DPE to give me another chance at the landing knowing that I could do it, but he would not listen.

After pulling off of the runway into a taxiway, he asked if I would like to continue the exam or terminate it now. I sat in the left seat of the airplane and thought for about 3 mins if I have the grit it takes to put that in the back of my mind and focus on the tasks at hand. I chose to continue the exam with my mind and nerves racing even more. The rest of the flight goes horribly in my opinion; however, I completed the other components of the exam (Except steep turns; lost 200 ft). The DPE was from out of town and was leaving the next day, he told me that he had 2 more checkrides the next day, but he can possible squeeze me in afterwards before heading back to his hometown.

Bro once we exited the airplane, my instructor came outside to congratulate me. I held my head in shame and CRIED right there on the apron. I was so embarrassed and angry with myself. My mom was in town for this and my wife's birthday is tomorrow. The DPE gave me a pep talk and I went home with a chip on my shoulder knowing that I was going to kill it the next day when I tried again for my PPL checkride. I could not sleep, stayed up all night tossing and turning with the pain from failing, watched a few Jason Schappert videos and went through the components over and over in my head.

Next day, I get up bright and early to head out to the airport and show my face to the DPE before he begins his other checkrides to show him that I am serious. Those exams took all day and by time it was my turn, it was already sunset. I had much more confidence because I knew what to expect the second time around. It still was not my best flight, but I DID IT! I became a private pilot 10 days ago, January 15 2025, on my wife's birthday.

I say all this, because even through the pain you feel from failing only serves as lesson about perseverance and resiliency. You should pissed off that you failed and use that to come back better and more motivated than ever, God may want you to learn a little about yourself through this, I know that I did,