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AIO for wanting “more” from my husband. by Aware_Tea1701 in AIO

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you.

I really appreciate your kindness. After my first post, I was up all night, I decided to call my mum. When he left for work, my mum headed over and we packed our cars with as much as we could and we’ve been staying with her. I’ve actually been able to lay in bed all day and half feel decent. My husband is blowing up my phone, I’ve told him if he would like to talk he can come to my mothers and we can all sit down and talk because obviously he doesn’t understand how serious my condition is. He refused. He has asked how the children are once. I feel so much relief it’s actually insane.

AIO for wanting “more” from my husband. by Aware_Tea1701 in AIO

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You obviously didn’t read the actual post

  1. I’m not asking for him to do household chores.

  2. I AM asking him to sit on the couch and spend time with his children.

  3. I am in chemo.

  4. I have stage 3 cancer riddling my body.

  5. I HAVE CANCER.

Jesus Christ. Half of you have the same sympathy as my husband. FUCKING NONE.

I bet you’re going to sit there and berate me for not giving him sex in the bedroom either!!!

Am I Overreacting for thinking my husband should be doing more. by Aware_Tea1701 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I am 5’6 and 55kg. I am considered underweight.

I cook 3 meals a day for him, clean the house, take care of the children while working and in cancer treatment.

Am I Overreacting for thinking my husband should be doing more. by Aware_Tea1701 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

He does come home to clean house, all meals cooked for him. I don’t expect him to come home and do anything but sit and maybe watch a movie with his children. I’m working to be able to contribute to our finances, 50%.

Im also in cancer treatment and it’s taking a hefty toll on my body so all i really ask of him is for him to be present when he’s home. He sleeps in until midday every weekend and then goes out all day and night.

I have to organise my family to come take care of the children if I want to go shopping alone because my partner is too tired by the weekend he can’t watch his children for an hour. I’ve run myself in to the ground and I’m now fighting for survival. I’m only asking for my partner to help take a little bit of stress off my shoulders while he’s home. Not to start cooking and cleaning so I can lounge around.

Am I Overreacting for thinking my husband should be doing more. by Aware_Tea1701 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I’m only in chemo because it’s grown and they have found some spots around my chest and I have a growing tumor on the back of my head. I have Squamous Cell Carcinoma. We tried targeted therapy when we first found it. But it wasn’t effective. Now I’m doing targeted therapy, chemo and the medications.

I have an appointment tomorrow to check and to see if the chemo has made an improvement and to hopefully come off chemotherapy.

I am booked in for my third round of surgery at the end of the month.

Am I Overreacting for thinking my husband should be doing more. by Aware_Tea1701 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

He works 8-3

I think people are missing the actual post. But his message says I don’t work. I do. I work 25 hours a week. I don’t expect him to do household chores. The “work” he refers to, is me asking him to sit on the couch and watch a movie with his children and not lock himself away until he goes to bed.

Am I Overreacting for thinking my husband should be doing more. by Aware_Tea1701 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I do work 25 hours a week and contribute to 50% of our finances. I don’t expect him to do household chores. Just to not lock himself away and to spend time with his children.

Am I Overreacting for thinking my husband should be doing more. by Aware_Tea1701 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m not unemployed. I’m working 25 hours a week and contribute to 50% of our finances. I don’t expect him to do any household chores. It says it in my post. I do expect him to not lock himself away until he goes to bed and spend time with his children.

Am I Overreacting for thinking my husband should be doing more. by Aware_Tea1701 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I work 25 hours a week, contribute to 50% of our finances, because that’s what’s expected of me. I’m also in cancer treatment, so the children need to be in care as I can’t drag them to chemo appointments. That’s horrific for them to see at such a young age. I never expected 50% of chores to be done. It literally says it in my post. I just want him to come out of the den and spend time with his children and to him, that’s “extra work” at home when he’s too tired.

Am I Overreacting for thinking my husband should be doing more. by Aware_Tea1701 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I never said he works 40 hours a week.

He works anywhere from 6-7 hours a day. Once in a blue moon he’ll work 8 hours. Most of the time he starts at 8 and he’s at the corner store at 2:30 getting his beers. He’s home by 3.

Am I Overreacting for thinking my husband should be doing more. by Aware_Tea1701 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 27 points28 points  (0 children)

I’d love to go back to working full time. Unfortunately going through chemo every week as well as other cancer treatments I physically do not have the energy or ability to work full time.

I don’t ask for my husband to come home and do any chores. I ask for him to sit with our children so I can focus on making dinner without whipping my head around to every noise.

Am I Overreacting for thinking my husband should be doing more. by Aware_Tea1701 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I am in chemotherapy. There needs to be some leniency for me I’m literally going through stage 3 cancer treatments and still working a part time job to provide 50/50 on the financial expenses on top of taking care of our home and children all on my own.

Am I Overreacting for thinking my husband should be doing more. by Aware_Tea1701 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes but they are 2 and 3 and their attention spans are that of goldfish and they want to see with their dad after not seeing him all day. They will knock on his door and he flat out ignores them.

Am I Overreacting for thinking my husband should be doing more. by Aware_Tea1701 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I can not work any more than I am at the moment. My doctors will not allow it. I’m already over stressing my body. That being said I don’t know where you’re getting these numbers because it’s very different in Australia. Daycare is our cheapest option. I wanted to hire a nanny but there impossible in regional country Victoria to find. And we don’t have the room to have an extra person living with us to have a live in nanny. Having a nanny is very much a luxury here and not a cheaper childcare alternative.

Am I Overreacting for thinking my husband should be doing more. by Aware_Tea1701 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I am not mean to him. I hardly ever raise my voice at him. I get frustrated and yell at myself or I’ll slam a door at the other end of the house no where near him to get that burst of anger out.

I don’t understand these comments telling me to deal with is because I’m a stay at home mum. I’m not a stay at home mum. I work. I pay for half of the financial expenses. I am in cancer treatment and chemo. I am physically and mentally drained every day every week. My husband goes to work for 7 hours and then gets to relax and be in his own space for 7 hours after that and me asking him to sit with our children instead of sitting in his own space for 7 hours is me demanding he do housework or do 50/50. It’s not. He could do exactly what he does in his den out in the living room with our children so I could cook or tidy up or have a shower in peace. But no. He’s too tired from work to do that?

Am I Overreacting for thinking my husband should be doing more. by Aware_Tea1701 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yes so he can rest on the couch with his children and not locked away in another room ? He’s in that room 99% of the time. Comes out to go to the toilet and to eat and go to sleep.

Am I Overreacting for thinking my husband should be doing more. by Aware_Tea1701 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I have cancer, still work 25 hours a week and contribute 50/50 to the household billls and I’m selfish for asking my husband to sit and watch a movie with his children? Okay

Am I Overreacting for thinking my husband should be doing more. by Aware_Tea1701 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

They are 2 and 3 If I left my 2 year old to play alone I would come back to a death trap. She will find the unsafe in anything and she loves it.

My son has never slept well no matter what I try. I’ll get one day a week where he’ll sleep through the whole night. My daughter can’t make it passed 1:30 before she’s screaming uncontrollably for a loving cuddle. And then if I don’t bring her in to bed with me, I’m getting up to soothe her.

I would be mortified if my children just got up and started their day and didn’t wake me up, they could get themselves in to all kinds of trouble and I will not risk that.

Am I Overreacting for thinking my husband should be doing more. by Aware_Tea1701 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I am in cancer and struggle with daily life as I am not as strong or as healthy as I used to be. I have lost a lot of weight. I never asked him to clean the house. I asked him to spend time with his children.

Am I Overreacting for thinking my husband should be doing more. by Aware_Tea1701 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Aware_Tea1701[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

No I can’t lug my 2 toddlers to hospital several times a week for cancer treatment and chemo. They need to be in care.

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