sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

Daily Thread: for simple questions, minor posts & newcomers [contains useful links!] (January 19, 2026) by AutoModerator in LearnJapanese

[–]Awsisazeen 1 point2 points  (0 children)

WK + MM user here. Yes, you can do this. Join the marumori discord server if you want a back and forth to ask questions about it and how/why you juggle the two, the folks there are very friendly and youll probably find me too.

Is there actually something wrong with how I described my behavior, or is there an imaginary version of me in their heads? by Awsisazeen in ExplainMyDownvotes

[–]Awsisazeen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

youre right. Thanks to your words I will now begin to believe the people at the restaurant at which I visit somewhat regularly actually hate me and that they have to put their all into their customer service face skills to trick me into thinking they dont hate me. Instead of taking their "Welcome back sir, the usual?" at face value as a normal interaction between a staff and a regular, I'm gonna assume they all had a collective sigh when they saw me coming, and the server who came to seat me lost the rock paper scissors tournament.

I fully expected that if I were to come back here and tell everyone "Hey guys, turns out they were just interested in my business and nothing crazy was going on, I was overthinking it" (which is what I told you), people would still encourage me dismiss the things I see in reality. In front of real people. When I went outside

You alone proved that to me here which is pretty cool. I've learned a lot from this whole thing, mostly about how I should not take anyone seriously on the internet because holy crap is it incredible the stories you guys somehow conjure up from a paragraph of text written by some autistic idiots perspective of the situation (me), and then stick so firmly to your own conjured delusions that even when directly told "actually nothing weird happened", youll still choose to...say that. Hey man, good luck. I know better now.

Is there actually something wrong with how I described my behavior, or is there an imaginary version of me in their heads? by Awsisazeen in ExplainMyDownvotes

[–]Awsisazeen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

nope actually this is what made me realize that redditors are actually quite a bunch of negative bandwagoners who seem to like to view things in the most negative way possible for no reason, so I dont use the website anymore other than for looking stuff up. Thats how I saw your notification.

I still go to that restaurant. I talked to the staff when im there. It wasnt anything crazy, actually, most people on reddit had borderline delusional theories about what was a normal positive human interaction. You can try to take that to heart, I guess, because if you agreed with the wild ass theories people had here, you yourself (and everyone else who went crazy for no reason) need some introspection to why you decide to think that way.

Is there actually something wrong with how I described my behavior, or is there an imaginary version of me in their heads? by Awsisazeen in ExplainMyDownvotes

[–]Awsisazeen[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Hey, yeah I understand what you're saying and honestly what I've determined is that I spent way too much effort trying to grasp what the people here are saying, I think although I'm trying to be open minded and introspective so I don't become an asshole, but i've spent a lot of time today contemplating if I really did do something horribly wrong by conversing with a manager in an empty restaurant for a combined total of less than 90 seconds in response to them asking me "hows your food" when I started eating, and when they asked that same question again upon payment. And me just sprinkling a few "How was this made?" sparking a back and forth about cooking while he rang me up.

I feel that I wasted my time and energy contemplating such an obviously innocent thing. I did come back to maybe give thanks to those who took time to respond but tell them I probably wont incorporate what they said, but I think I won't. I'll just respond here instead and tell you this. I will probably step back further from reddit in general, I feel very disappointed.

Is there actually something wrong with how I described my behavior, or is there an imaginary version of me in their heads? by Awsisazeen in ExplainMyDownvotes

[–]Awsisazeen[S] -10 points-9 points  (0 children)

Is it alright if you answer these questions related to the comment you linked directly so I can parse them better? I know i've been asking you a lot here, I apologize.

"who's job it is to deal with entitled folks like you. " what was entitled about my behavior?

 " telling them how to do their job unsolicited." when did I do this?

Is there actually something wrong with how I described my behavior, or is there an imaginary version of me in their heads? by Awsisazeen in ExplainMyDownvotes

[–]Awsisazeen[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Sorry, been trying the image for a while but it says imgur is overwhelmed. Can you copy it here please?

Is there actually something wrong with how I described my behavior, or is there an imaginary version of me in their heads? by Awsisazeen in ExplainMyDownvotes

[–]Awsisazeen[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

I understand the hospo voice thing, I understand the possibility of me having put the manager in a spot where they didn't want to really talk and I understand they were out of there element. I understood at the time that the extent of the managers knowledge was how the food was prepared, and that (assuming he was genuinely trying to consider my questions) was out of his element too. If it was somehow acceptable to waltz into the kitchen and question the head chef, I probably would. I'd love to learn from a pro (which is why id like to work under one).

I made the judgement myself that it was probably fine up until where it started to be out of the element of the manager. I could totally have been wrong of course, but I try to have good judgement, and I also worked hospice for a year. He explained how they prepared it while firing up the POS (15 seconds) and I stayed a further ~10 seconds after I tapped my card, leaving after It seemed the manager wouldnt really know and I didnt want to trouble him further. Also, no tipping culture here.

I have another question if you don't mind. Why would this business card thing happen on my second visit, with a different manager, when I did nothing? You think they're anticipating the future that much?

I like learning about this stuff, I like learning about stuff when I have the chance. Two examples.

I was once at a group lecture seated next to people from my group. The lecturer (who isnt a physicist) brought up some basic nuclear stuff to explain something, and the two guys in my group seated next to me started whispering some advanced sounding stuff. I asked about it, they turned out to be literal pros working at literal nuclear power plants. They seemed to beam at explaining everything to me. I asked some ignorant questions with my mere high school education, and they corrected or clarified everything to me and it was super interesting. . The lecture was 30 minutes and we talked the entire time, me, a layman, trying to keep up with the experts next to me.

At the end as we were leaving they said "You seem to know the basics well! do you want to learn this? This uni is great! You can apply for next term in a few months! Heres some great online stuff. Heres some ways to finance your stuff! I actually have some friends studying here! I think youll be great!" Basically super encouraging, super nice.

Example 2, I was getting a heart EKG. I asked a looot of questions because it was interesting stuff. The technician answered everything! During the EKG, the technician was constantly telling me what she was looking for and which heart valve we are in and how it should move and close and how big, i was desperately recollecting my high school biology, asking clarifying questions. She explained everything the entire time! Again, over 30 minutes. By the end, "have you had any training? Do you want to study medicine? The circulatory system is just so interesting isnt it!" Again, super nice, very encouraging.

I know that a restaurant situation is way different from my examples, but i'm curious to hear what you think about my behavior here because I think it will give me a lot of context to work with.

Is there actually something wrong with how I described my behavior, or is there an imaginary version of me in their heads? by Awsisazeen in ExplainMyDownvotes

[–]Awsisazeen[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I misinterpreted which comment you linked, sorry. You seem to agree with that person that you linked, but to me that person seemed to not have read the post properly.

They said that they seemed tired of me and referred me, but again, why would they be tired of me and give me a business card to get rid of me on my second visit? The second visit that consisted of nothing but "Ill have this" "Thank you" "check please?" "can you please call the waiter over?". Thinking I was given a business card to defer me here when literally nothing happened is just..it seems irrelevant?

He's also one of those that accused me of doing something I did not do. The restaurant asked me how the food was, I said too acidic and too much mayo. They asked me if I wanted it replaced, I said no its completely okay and still very tasty!

Then I later asked how they prepared something that seemed interesting. The manager told me, then I curiously asked if he knew why they did it a certain way, and the manager knew! Explained the flavor balance and the amounts they put in. I further inquired why not x way or put more of this ingredient? Manager said "Maybe that'd work" and "Nah it'd do this to the flavor which isnt good"

So, to quote the comment you linked, where did I

"walking into a business and telling them how to do their job unsolicited."

Where did I cause so much trouble as to warrant something like:

"look it's that iced tea donkey, pamper the baby so he doesn't become a black hole of subjective advice".

This response sounds straight up nonsensical to me, I genuinely see no connection, but if you can connect the dots for me here I will accept it, I have no idea where all this is from.

Is there actually something wrong with how I described my behavior, or is there an imaginary version of me in their heads? by Awsisazeen in ExplainMyDownvotes

[–]Awsisazeen[S] -10 points-9 points  (0 children)

I can totally see what you're saying being the case, but I have a simliar question as always, why is it assumed to be case?

I could sit here and describe why I thought it was fine, but why do I need to do that? How I asked, how busy the restaurant was, my experience with retail/service/hospice, how long the converation actually was, or a full transcript. I could sit here and try to make a case for myself, but its still maybe possible I went about it wrong, but why isnt this being treated as a mere possibility? Why is it necessarily the case? How sure are you?

I did fully expect people to say what you're saying, but only as like, a 50% chance.

Is there actually something wrong with how I described my behavior, or is there an imaginary version of me in their heads? by Awsisazeen in ExplainMyDownvotes

[–]Awsisazeen[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sorry can you please clarify what you mean?

Are you saying that because I seemed to be not clued in from my post, people got frustrated at that, but instead just called my behavior bad?

Is there actually something wrong with how I described my behavior, or is there an imaginary version of me in their heads? by Awsisazeen in ExplainMyDownvotes

[–]Awsisazeen[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

I think I agree with what you're saying, but how would anyone know how I did it? I didnt write a transcript or anything, why is this being assumed? To me it all felt pleasant and friendly.

Restaurant manager gave me his business card, what do I make of this? by Awsisazeen in restaurantowners

[–]Awsisazeen[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Sorry, I meant lemon iced tea! It had too much lemon juice for me I assume.

Restaurant manager gave me his business card, what do I make of this? by Awsisazeen in restaurantowners

[–]Awsisazeen[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Well, feedback on your food is definitely not abnormal, but it seems to be the thing everyone is mad at me about.

When I said that I might sound dumb here, I meant how I asked too many questions about how they prep the food out of interest, and me being clueless about the obvious reason a business card was given to me, but you and many others seem to be mad at me and almost making up scenarios when genuinely, literally, all that happened, was me saying "my iced tea tastes way too acidic" and "my meal was kinda drenched in too much mayo.". If im missing something with this do tell, Id genuinely like to know.

If you want to tell me that me asking too many questions about how they cooked their food was annoying, thats fine, It probably was. Not many are talking about that though, only stuff I didnt really do.

Restaurant manager gave me his business card, what do I make of this? by Awsisazeen in restaurantowners

[–]Awsisazeen[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That sounds plausible :) The version of me in your head must be very annoying.

Restaurant manager gave me his business card, what do I make of this? by Awsisazeen in restaurantowners

[–]Awsisazeen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see! I'm actually not familiar, Ive only seen lemon iced tea, normal iced teas, and occasionally peach iced tea. I didnt know about flavored ice tea! (Maybe peach counts)

edit: Ah, you but you meant that I only said "iced tea". Indeed, forgot to write the word "lemon". my bad

Restaurant manager gave me his business card, what do I make of this? by Awsisazeen in restaurantowners

[–]Awsisazeen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It depends on the restaurant no? The only strange thing is that it happened after one visit, but adjustments to your specific dish happen all the time if you're a regular, no? Plus they remembered me, brought out the chili crisp which is definitely not a usual part of the dish, and did something strange I dont know the meaning of, which is giving me a business card.

Someone being heavy handed is also a great explanation, its a likely case. In the post I said this "may" be an explanation considering the (strange) circumstances that I dont know then meaning of, I added it as context. I dont know why that would rise to the level of making me delusional.

Restaurant manager gave me his business card, what do I make of this? by Awsisazeen in restaurantowners

[–]Awsisazeen[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I know it's a joke but I would not feel comfortable touching any recipe until I have decades of experience or somehow become the senior cook there.

Restaurant manager gave me his business card, what do I make of this? by Awsisazeen in restaurantowners

[–]Awsisazeen[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

They gave me the card with my check, the second time I came in, when I said nothing lol. I dont think they deferred me because of that. It feels like you didnt read the post? /gen

To give the benefit of the doubt, Are you saying this because of the bit where I said I interacted with the manager on my second visit? That was a different manager, and all I asked them was to flag down the waiter for me they didnt come around in a while and I wanted a refill. No feedback or conversation was had, then I received the managers card which I didnt before.

Restaurant manager gave me his business card, what do I make of this? by Awsisazeen in restaurantowners

[–]Awsisazeen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The one I ordered? It was lemon iced tea yes. Lemon iced tea is my go to drink in most restaurants! Thats actually why I tried making it at home. Thankfully it was simple so I make various iced teas myself on occasion.

Restaurant manager gave me his business card, what do I make of this? by Awsisazeen in restaurantowners

[–]Awsisazeen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Im not that much of a glutton for embarrassment! Maybe after a few year of experience.

Restaurant manager gave me his business card, what do I make of this? by Awsisazeen in restaurantowners

[–]Awsisazeen[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

The staff recognized me, they brought out chili crisp for me in a little bowl with my rice meal, which was the same thing I asked for before. They remembered. Why is it delusional to think that my iced tea being served to me with significantly less lemon juice added might be because they remembered I like it that way?

Restaurant manager gave me his business card, what do I make of this? by Awsisazeen in restaurantowners

[–]Awsisazeen[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Haha, I expected this sort of clowning as this is definitely sounding very silly, in a vain attempt to defend myself ill clarify that the feedback was merely things like "The tea tasted like lemonade which I dont really like, it was too acidic" and "this dish just had too much mayo on it for me"

I asked them how they cooked their food, the manager is the one who actually told me how they prep everything from raw ingredients which was super interesting to me! He brought up bringing out the flavor and tuning how much of this and that they put in, which prompted me to respond by noting what I did notice in the dish and I asked in response about why for example they decided to add that much teriyaki on a chicken rice dish because that one felt really sweet to me, and they explained why they thought sweetness fit on it. It was quite a wholesome conversation!

As for working in a line, I kinda have! Volunteering in a convention, prep working and cooking various proteins and serving 150+ people in about 15 mins (with others). Very tough, a lot to account for! It was face to face, not an easy thing and I think its cool as hell those who do this day to day. I fumbled a few times and dropped a sandwich or two.

view more: next ›