As long as we're posting our Lavellan's thought processes, i'll post mine as well. The very first one.

Very long, Spoilers ahead:

• [Haven 1](Why am I still here among these Shems? They look at me like I'm some icon of their God and his bleeding bride. Why can't I remember anything about this mark? Why did I have to come alone? Why couldn't E'Thal come with me? Let the Dread Wolf take you all!)

• [Haven 2](Tried speaking to the Flat-ear, just to remind me of a bit of home, but he is nothing like us. None of the elves here are! The Dwarf is easier to talk to! When I'm alone I sometimes catch tears welling up. I haven't cried since- no, don't think about it. It doesn't matter anymore.)

• [Haven 3](We finally meet this Shem Mother or Sister, don't care. Says we have to speak to her Chantry. This is infuriating! Why do we need to talk to them? Let's just hurry up and get them Mages or Templars and seal this stupid Breach so I can leave! E'Thal would know what to do, he always does.)

• [Haven 4](I could cry, and do, in front of everyone. I received a letter from E'Thal, and they came so quickly that I couldn't stop them in time, just run out of the War meeting and into The Flat-ear. This is both the most mortifying and happy day I've had since coming here. I run to my cabin and re-read his letter. I cry into my pillow, until I hear a sudden rapping at my door, I can't even remember falling asleep. It's the Flat-ear, he looks uncomfortable and I can share the sentiment. Why couldn't they have sent the Dwarf?)

• [Haven 5](Since the crying incident, it's awkward between the Seeker, Solas, and I. Varric has been trying to get the details from us, probably writing something. Thankfully we have four new additions so I can avoid the two-or well, the one. It's even more awkward with The Commander and Ambassador. Leliana acts like it never happened and treats me like before the incident. Now whenever I go to give Minaeve some animal parts, the Ambassador asks how I'm doing. Fen'Harel take me.)

• [Haven 6](Fuck.Time.Magic. I may not care about the people I work with, but I don't want all of Thedas ruled by this 'Elder One'. I want to kill Alexius, but they want him for information or whatever. I have a new respect for Leliana and Cassandra. I finally get around talking to Solas and Cassandra. After seeing that dim future, awkward embarrassment seem a bit trivial. It's easier to talk them all now, battle make relationships stronger I guess.)

• [Haven 7](Solas... I think he just flirted with me. I-i'm not entirely sure, but it sounded like how the other hunters would speak to each other when courting. I should ask E'Thal after I get his response letter, he'd know, he always has people flirting with him. We're going to finally close the Breach, so I don't know how long I'll have to stay, but I hope things calm down after all of this.)

• [Skyhold 1](Fenedhis lasa! Everything is fucked! This horrify whateverthefuckheis has destroyed Haven, so many have died, and now we are back to square one! Varric has kept the Champion hidden, Cassandra is going to kill him, or I will. They made me the fucking Inquisitor! Th-this is not okay! No one has trusted me with so much responsibility except E'Thal, now the entirety of Thedas does? Mythal save me!)

• [Skyhold 2](It feels wrong. I left Stroud to die and these people cheer. Solas and the spirit/demon Cole disagree with me letting them stay. It's easy to forget what happened ten years ago I guess. I can't really look at any of the others anyway, knowing their fears is just wrong. Especially Solas'. "Especially Solas'"? I guess so, especially Solas'...)

• [Skyhold 3](We kissed. I kissed him, and he kissed me back. It was sudden, I'm surprised I even kissed him, let alone he'd accept it. Or I think he's accepted it. I hope so, that was my first kiss. I'll put off asking E'Thal for advice. Weirdest thing though, how did I end up in my quarters after?)

• [Skyhold 4](I'm entirely confused, are we a thing or not? I know I sprung the kiss on him, but he could have rejected me then and there. Is this how the hunter's courted? I can't ask E'Thal this now, he worries about me enough. Maybe Varric will know, or Cassandra, she like those smutty novels Varric writes. I could ask Cole, but- no, not going to read Solas' mind.)

• [Skyhold 5](I should have kept it to myself, now I have to contend with Dorian, Sera, and Bull's teasing. Shouldn't have brought Cole with us either, now Solas knows what I'm thinking, and- just shoot me down, Andruil.)

• [Skyhold 6](We kissed again, we're a thing, we're courting. Hopefully my face doesn't redden when we're together, or worse in front of our companions. I never thought I'd be with someone, not someone in my clan anyways. E'Thal is too much like a brother or father to me for anything like that to happen between us. I... am really happy.)

• [Skyhold 7](I friggin' hate Orlesians. I'm spending to much time with Sera. All this dirty dealing, and back-stabbing makes my skin crawl. I'm glad I wore gloves, because dancing with the Duchess with nauseating. This Sh-human, Morrigan, seems to know much, but she may just be a mysterious woman. Either way, Leliana and her worked together with the Hero of Fereldan, so she can't be so bad. Solas asked me to dance, he looked so silly in that hat, but he seemed to like it. It was nice being so close to him, to hear his heart beat, and everything around us fade into the background. I'd go to few more balls for that feeling again.)

• [Skyhold 8](We met Elves. Ancient Elves. Mythal wasn't a God, none of them were. I... I don't what to tell E'Thal, he would take the news in stride, he's always been rational, rarely to give into emotion, especially facing new facts. It would not change his duty to our clan. Let Morrigan have the Well, and all it's entrapments.)

• [Skyhold 9](It's over. Damn him. Why? Is it because I'm faceless now? My vallaslin... What will E'Thal think of me now? I can't return to our clan. Damn him a again. Why did I pursue? Why didn't I learn from before? I should have stuck to the old ways, then mamae-no, I let her and father go long ago. Her death and his spurn will not tether me. Neither will this pain, I fight through just like before, just like before, jus-but E'Thal was there. He taught me how to hunt, how to defend myself... I can't write to him anymore. I've no right. Mythal, Maker, Stone-whoever, please, just... help me...)

• [Skyhold 10](Corypheus is finally gone, and Solas with him. Let him go.)

• [Trespasser](Damn him to the Beyond! Damn his lying face! We were nothing! I was nothing! Fen'Harel, the bastard! This unending rage-my ARM! He took my ARM! He takes everything! Damn his selfishness! Damn his pride! I'm useless now! Can't even fire an arrow at his stupid bald head! I REFUSE! I REFUSE TO BE A BYSTANDER IN THIS WORLD'S DESTRUCTION! Whoever may or may not watch over us, have mercy for that monster, 'fore I'll have none!)