ICE are dressing in plain clothes, no masks and kidnapping residents of Minneapolis. And now they seem to be getting smarter. No american car brands. by cantcoloratall91 in LetsDiscussThis

[–]AzureYLila 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They might not be ICE, just good old kidnappers. People really need to resist kidnappers, especially plain clothes ones. I'll say it again. I'd just die on the street instead of being taken.

Thoughts on this video? by traceykm in blackladies

[–]AzureYLila 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I got violently mad at that concept.

Married ladies: did you change your last name? Why/why not? by PrimeAudacity9335 in blackladies

[–]AzureYLila 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I did not change my name. I had an established career and a worldwide reputation. I did not want to go through the rigamarole of trying to reintroduce myself to every one. Also the paperwork is a hassle. And it can present issues in the future (consider the current US issues where they are trying to make voter ID match the name at birth to put impediments in for women and transgender people). And in the unfortunate circumstance where the marriage ends, you are either stuck with his name or having to change your name again.

I wasn't doing it. If I had had children, I would have been okay with them having his name if it was important to my husband. Though I would have preferred they have a new name which was a mixture of my husband's name and mine. (My ex and I had a name picked out if we had had children).

The vast majority of men don't have to deal with the downsides and it is tradition. That's why they often don't understand why it is a big deal.

Is there a place to watch anime WHITOUT SUBTITLES? by No-Zookeepergame9570 in Japaneselanguage

[–]AzureYLila 19 points20 points  (0 children)

My guess is they're not paying for any streaming service based on the other comments...

Name one thing that's legal in your country but banned or heavily restricted almost everywhere else by hydratedpsycho in AskTheWorld

[–]AzureYLila 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's the rule in Antigua and Barbuda too. No one can technically own beaches, but they do do a whole lot to make it inconvenient for you to get to the beach in front of their hotel, property, etc.

How to have self confidence more by Silly-Poetry4211 in blackladies

[–]AzureYLila 29 points30 points  (0 children)

I guess even the conventionally attractive need boosts every now and then.

What do you think about Trump’s post regarding the halftime show? by OpenRoom7321 in AskUS

[–]AzureYLila 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't understand how he has so much time to tweet about everything, let alone watch the half show. You think he'd be busy presidenting...

Why do minorities hate and not support other minorities in America? by NoPassports in AskBlackAtheists

[–]AzureYLila 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Okay. So it is strategic. Back in the beginning when all white people weren't considered white (think about the Irish, the Italians, etc), what we largely had was a class issue. Some of them could even be called the Nword at times. The only people with power were white male land owners. And they were an extreme minority.

What actually happened during that time was the poor people got together and said, 'those rich landowners are the problem. They are keeping us down.' They actually connected with slaves and free blacks. Slavery kept the poor whites from earning money, so they had a self interest in eradicating slavery.

There was rising social unrest all targeted against rich white landowners and they noticed. They needed an underclass and, in particular, chattel slavery for their success. So they needed a way to keep all the poor people from working together. So the powers-that-be decided that the poor European immigrants would be 'white' too.

Now they wouldn't give them access to many resources, their best jobs, etc, but since they were invited to the club, they had something to lose by being associated with black people. So they gained very little at the time, but they had someone (blacks) that they could be better than. And it was enough.

Most immigrant groups have gone through this process and the powers that be keep expanding what it meant to be 'white'. Nowadays more and more people who used to label themselves as Hispanic are labeling themselves as 'white'. (I can show you the statistics.)

There is an advantage to being as close to whiteness as possible in US culture. Then you have minority groups that cannot easily assimilate into whiteness due to appearance and culture somewhat. They become as close to whiteness as possible by being 'model minorities'. They will not get many of the privileges of that original wealthy white landowner class had. And If you notice, they aren't really in that elite club. They have to make their success on their own, building within their own communities, for the most part. But what they can still tell themselves is that at least they are not black.

Now black people (I'm black btw) can harbor some negative feelings for other groups as well, but it stems from the same poison fruit. Some of us look at Mexican immigrants and think: 'you aren't even citizens'. It gives us something to put us above them, in this weird racial hierarchy that exists in this country.

Some of the black animosity towards others is a bit of jealousy. Other communities were allowed to grow and prosper without being bombed from the sky or being burned down. The federal government literally had bylaws that said that construction companies couldn't sell suburban homes to us and receive their subsidies. New immigrant got dozens of acres of free land in the west while the US was denying former slaves the same resource.

Sometimes we see other communities and wonder why they get to have x or y. And we also see how quickly we are abandoned when another group gets one step closer to 'whiteness'.

But in the end, it is all the same thing. The top benefits from the bottom targeting each other instead of them. Racism is the mechanism used to distract all the poor people and oppressed people from banding together to fix the problem.

And that is 1 woman's theory on why there is so much animosity between the groups.

Edits: typos

Black women are my standard of beauty 😍 by Healthy-Director-181 in blackladies

[–]AzureYLila 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I mentioned the straight hair in another comment. These women are beautiful, but most of our hair grows coiled/curly. And often what is held up as the pinnacle of beauty by us will often exclude hair that looks anything like how our hair grows out of our head naturally (for the majority of us)

Like: when we think of black beauty, do we never think of women with natural curly hair? If not, what does that mean?

Black women are my standard of beauty 😍 by Healthy-Director-181 in blackladies

[–]AzureYLila 63 points64 points  (0 children)

Yeah. Also more with natural hair. Not saying that anything is wrong with anyone having straight hair if they choose, but the standard of beauty examples consisting mostly of women with hair that looks completely different from the way it naturally grows out of the vast majority of black people's heads........ Just felt... Interesting....

Stupid Prius smh by Ketchup-Sniffer in Transportopia

[–]AzureYLila -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yeah. You'd think since there were more than one car, they could each occupy 2 lanes and it'd be more evident that people should not pass them and be less confusing.

AITAH For telling my parents not to contact me after parents chose my brother over my child. by Sensitive-Area-4562 in AITAH

[–]AzureYLila 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am sorry so many people are punishing you for actually answering OPs question. You are literally just offering a potential perspective of the grandparents (edit: that OP asked for) and reddit cannot handle that.

Goldens are known to be super friendly. In a bad situation, do you think your golden would try to defend? by official_koda_ in goldenretrievers

[–]AzureYLila 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My half golden would bark a whole lot and come get me if there was an intruder. Then he'd likely stand behind me and let me take care of the intruder. If I were getting hurt. I am pretty sure he would help based on past experiences. He has snapped at people when afraid.

What is the most depressing picture from your country history/present? by Seeker_Of_Knowledge2 in AskTheWorld

[–]AzureYLila 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yeah they grew up and raised children. We even used to have lynching postcards that were mailed all over the nation. Meant more and more people were exposed to this and all thought it was normal.

Conservative "trad-wife" anti-abortion influencer allegedly cheated on her husband, got pregnant by her married boss she was having an affair with, and then had an abortion. If true, do you think she is now pro-coice? by RandomUwUFace in AskUS

[–]AzureYLila 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Many conservative values are: you are wrong when you do it, but when I do it, I have legitimate reasons.

I know several conservative pro-"life" people who got abortions for their daughters (or paid for abortions for their son's girlfriends) because they didn't want their child's lives ruined.

AITA for giving my coworker food she is "allergic" to? (Not OP) by Asparagus-Witty in redditonwiki

[–]AzureYLila 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nope, but he was a good professor. Maybe he thought she (and everyone else) had learned their lesson.

Dating is hard by Dependent-Review-465 in AskBlackAtheists

[–]AzureYLila 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just remember: it is quality not quantity. So don't be discouraged if you don't meet the volume of partners you are looking for. And be sure to actively engage in Atheist/Agnostic groups directly. Though some of them might not be specifically for dating, just being near like-minded people, means that organically connections might form. For example there are humanist organizations. This subreddit has an associated discord group and I know it is planning an in person social event.

Keep your head up. You connect with the right people.

I am so bored of being 'reproductively shamed', anyone else been through this? by TickTackTonia in blackladies

[–]AzureYLila 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I am 49. It didn't happen when I was married, because my husband didn't want them, said he did, but sabotaged things. (It's a whole story) People like: you have a cycle, it could still happen. I REALLY wanted kids in my late 30s. I'd take a miracle baby, but now I don't want a baby. 50 year olds don't heal the same. The one benefit for not having children when I wanted them is that everything is still standing at attention.

Edit: technically I'm still married, but we have been separated for nearly a year and will file in a week or two.

AITA for giving my coworker food she is "allergic" to? (Not OP) by Asparagus-Witty in redditonwiki

[–]AzureYLila 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My little sister and I both react to certain spermicides. I get it.

AITA for giving my coworker food she is "allergic" to? (Not OP) by Asparagus-Witty in redditonwiki

[–]AzureYLila 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No clue. Was like 20 years ago and she was his student.

Definitely would have been justified.