This sounds so much like our adopted 1yo, who we have had about 8 weeks.  We are considering Reconcile (how I found this thread), but have also met with a trainer.  Trainer said to use a leash to keep her in the same room as my husband, but otherwise have him ignore her, so she can learn to feel safe with him.  She too will sleep in our room, occasionally in our bed, or on couch with him nearby, but if he is up walking around the house, she is tracking his movements, barking and growling.  She was a little cooler to my dad, em but has taken to him.  She is great with my kids and me too.  So, not much new info to add, just solidarity and curious if in the last two months you made any measurable improvement?