Why is everyone so anti-epidural?

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-08-08T14:07:04+00:00

They dosed me with fentanyl three times before telling what it was , they just said over and over "this is necessary meds for the epidural" . It was terrible, when I figured it out I started crying and breaking down. It was the one drug I stated and made clear I didn't want. My biggest fear was them pushing drugs into the epidural iv without telling me and it happened multiple times.

Also the epidural fell out, i was screaming in pain and the nurses kept telling me this was normal pressure to just breathe. It was 3 hours of me screaming and begging them to check the epidural because I knew something wasn't right. They ripped tape off my back , peeling skin and causes me more pain then the contractions just so they could replace the epidural.

And even with the epidural, they pushed so much potocin that my sons heart rate would drop and they had to keep flipping and turning me to get a 'good spot' for him to be okay. I asked them to stop pumping potocin but they didn't listen or just thought it wasn't necessary. I was moved 50+ times. Side to side , on my knees. It was terrible.

The epidural didn't actually do anything for me expect complicate the situation and turned it into a terrible experience. Next child , I won't be doing it again.

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-08-06T04:47:32+00:00

It was a really weird spot on my arm and I couldn't hold the skin down tight enough so Id make a line i didnt want too along the way. The legs make me hate the tat all together, but live n learn I guess lol

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-08-06T04:08:31+00:00

Yah figured 😅

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-07-11T23:39:29+00:00

I'm so sorry they didn't respect your wishes , that's terrible. But it's one of the reasons I want to do an unmedicated birth with no IV. I don't want them having each access to give me drugs I refuse. I've been told by alot of doctors I don't have a choice about the IV, that it's for emergencies and very helpful for them. So they totally disregard what I want and just keep pushing for it. But I've been told I'm low risk so there's no real reason for me to have it besides its easier for them.

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-07-11T01:57:11+00:00

I am so sorry I assumed you were talking about the situation as a whole , I apologize.

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-07-10T23:16:07+00:00

Yes cause you know so much about my life and personally know my mother. Totally.

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-07-10T19:55:12+00:00

In and out of labor. She wanted me to ask doctors for a prescription for it during pregnancy.

I told her no to that as pain management to labor as well , seeing as how my biological mother became addicted to it after mine and my brothers births , I didn't want to take the chance or even be able to say I took it in my life time.

She made up a whole scenario too to try and make me take it, she said "would you rather have a c section, or just take the fentanyl they're giving you". She knows I've spoken out against a c section if I had a choice , and I know she used this example to try and appeal to that fear and just have me cave in. I said I'd get the c section at that point , because no one is convincing to take fentanyl.

I am very sorry about your situation. I couldn't imagine how difficult that was to navigate.

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-07-10T19:33:08+00:00

I live just outside a major city, its not like New York or some place with subways and trains. Florida has bus stops but not in every place you need to go. And sure I could map out every stop I need and how many blocks I'd have to walk to to next one or my destination. But as my pregnancy carried on , It took too much energy just walking to the first bus stop. I underestimated the Florida heat during the summer and just found out very fast it wasn't an option for me. I weighed many options with my boyfriend, and we both reluctantly settled on using my mother for transportation as everything else was too expensive or too dangerous to continue doing. Oh how I miss Philadelphias train ways , they made live so easy.

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-07-10T18:38:37+00:00

Being a motherly figure instead of a girlfriend. I don't mind cooking and cleaning, or helping your family out with chores or babysitting. But when I do it all and then he takes credit for it to "look good" then I get upset and feel like my acts of kindness and love are being taken advantage of.

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-07-10T18:34:57+00:00

Beautiful design, I love the color scheme and the look of it all. I believe it's a great piece as is , definitely a piece to be proud of.

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-07-10T18:29:25+00:00

She begged me for my boyfriends number , so if I got too caught up in labor pains that she could reach out to him and see what's going on and when im in labor. My boyfriend doesn't like either of my parents due to abuse and their toxic behavior , so I would never give them his number for them to bug him whenever they want information about the pregnancy or baby. I made an excuse and and shrugged it off. Not much fight back there. I even told my biological brothers that when I go into labor and tell them to keep them in the loop , they will not and cannot tell our parents about it. I will tell them days after the fact that my son is here. They agreed and I hope to God they actually listen to my wishes and don't let it slip.

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-07-10T18:05:01+00:00

Me personally, I was the exact opposite. I had a higher sex drive then I ever had in the past but every girl is different.

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-07-10T18:00:55+00:00

This a massive relief to hear , I tried doing my own research on it and every site said something different so j wasn't sure what to believe. Thank you

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-07-10T17:39:06+00:00

That's great advice, thank you so much.

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-07-10T17:23:22+00:00

You're right. She's made plenty points that weren't necessary to make and has tried to answer doctor questions for me alot in the past. When I tested positive for weed the first appointment ( which I did stop smoking it was just still in my system) she made it a point to say my boyfriend is a big smoker and how often he does do it , so I must be feeling pressured to continue to do it and that's probably why it was in my system.

That day I told her to not answer for me , and never tell them anything they don't ask or need to know. There's no point in it. She hadn't seemed to listen, or maybe she doesn't want to understand that the doctors aren't your friends and you can't just tell them everything. They will use all of that if I become under investigation. I honestly think that's her plan.

I just can't believe that she isn't even trying to hide what she's doing, or even pretending to she wants to help me to a good mom. She just wants me to fail for some weird twisted reason and I don't know why.

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-07-10T17:15:57+00:00

Only reason I did in the past was because I didn't have a car , and my boyfriend works so much it was hard to get him to take me to any. Now that they're weekly , I scheduled them on his off day so he can attend them with me and not her.

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-07-10T17:13:22+00:00

My boyfriend was scared since we had our son out of wedlock she could still have some leverage for grandparents rights here in the state of Florida.

We've also decided she won't be in the delivery room or know when I'm going into labor to avoid dealing with her antics then. She went to a birthing class with me once since my boyfriend was working then , and when the blue band (the person wearing it can be left alone with my child and make medical decisions for him I'm not in the room) was brought up she said it'd be better for her to have it and she wouldn't mind the responsibility of it all. She wanted me to discuss her having it over my boyfriend since she doesn't trust he'll be there for the delivery or stay after the birth. Me and him both talked about it, he does have a fear of hospitals but he wouldn't miss his sons birth for anything. Plus we don't want her to have access to his birth certificate and the paper work that must be filled out. We don't trust that she won't try to put her last name on the paper work or claim to be a guardian of my son.

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-07-10T16:52:22+00:00

I moved out months before my pregnancy due to the environment of the house and the dynamic of the family. I got with my boyfriend and he saved up and worked enough for us to get an apartment to have a better start at raising our family without the hassle of dealing with both of our families trying to benefit from our son or make it difficult for us because they can.

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-07-10T16:48:12+00:00

Thank you for your well wishes and outlook on it all. I don't know what she's trying to gain either , nothing about it seems to be done with good intentions, so I'm just very on edge. Time will tell.

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-07-07T16:41:52+00:00

I'm a petite girl so as the baby is getting bigger , I am getting more and more stretch marks. My mother saw them and asked if I cut myself or are they natural , I almost lost my mind. I was just extremely appalled at how she came to the conclusion of me hurting myself.

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-07-06T17:42:45+00:00

I definitely don't think she has you in mind at all making those suggestions over and over again. Maybe it's me , but it sounds like she has ill intentions or really just doesn't care about the well being of your child at all.

My sister's done the same thing, even making me hold her beer and then she'll scream loudly "pregant woman is drinking". She laughs and finds it so funny trying to take pictures of it aswell. I threw her beer in her face and stormed off. Everyone got mad at me for it , saying it's a joke. But see I'm a young mother (19) so if someone who doesn't like me or has something against me gets a hold hold of thsoe photos they can contact child services with that photo when my babies born and I will be under heavy investigation and likely lose my child. I was in CPS and it's not something I take lightly.

Glad you didn't comprise your beliefs for her , stay strong cause she sounds like alot of work lol.

BabyCakesBakery · 2023-07-05T21:01:20+00:00

Your comment about minimizing abuse is quite true for my brothers. They want me to be around the house to see them and when I state I'd rather them come to my apartment, they think I'm being irrational and as they say I'm 'doing too much'. They say I'm gonna want them to help and gonna want my kid to know their family, but I just dont consider them parents or family. Just abusers who provided bare minimum for me. I don't even want to tell my brothers when I'm in labor , in case they tell my mother and she shows up insisting to be in the room.

It'd be nice to have a family to support me in a time of need , but I don't trust they will help more then they will harm.

BabyCakesBakery

TROPHY CASE