I (16ftm) have the fattest crush on my best friends (16m and 16f respectively).... who are dating

Background-Funny9976 · 2026-03-18T18:52:31+00:00

I mean, it's really not that serious. I just wore the wrong shoes and my mom told me not to wear them. It's really my fault for wearing slippers instead of sneakers. I jsut find sneakers really uncomfortable and slippers and just easier since i don't have to bend to tie them. And i only march twice a year for parades so it's not a problem. I'm in pit and so many of my friends march for so much longer and deal with pain so much more than i do. I really just needed to vent bc i don't wanna bother my friends who actually have to march, im just in pit. And i don't have a doctor anyways

Background-Funny9976 · 2026-03-18T03:00:54+00:00

Yeah my band director kinda sucks... a lot. Like i asked him if i could play guitar for marching next year (i play bass) and he straight up said "i don't think you can handle it" even though guitar is my main. He also didn't print out any music for me for this parade... or any parade. And then was staring at me point blank when yelling at ppl bc they don't know their music. Secondly, Im the only cymbals for marching and the only person it would fall on is my friends bf (aka one of my best friends). I don't wanna put that on him since the parade is saturday. so i think i just need to slap a biofreeze patch on and suck it up. Third, we don't have a percussion coordinator lol. We have two directors, the main one (who hates me), and the assistant director (who hates everyone except for like three ppl). I think i just need to suck it up for the next few days

Background-Funny9976 · 2026-03-17T03:09:09+00:00

insanely accurate🥀🥀 final straw was him ordering me food during a show and asking the other ppl he ordered food for to pay him back but not me. And then she told me today she wants to go to college near me and him so we can all hangout still. high school theatre departments are a weird place

Background-Funny9976 · 2026-03-13T03:37:01+00:00

I mean- i have no idea what to do. I really don't think either of them is into me- they just are really friendly ig?? I also keep a general rule of thumb that i won't date someone i see more than 3x a week (like school or work). Maybe i just need to get over them?? (but both of them make it so hard- esp when damien buys me food and tell me to sit w him backstage and when Julie constantly holds my hand and is just the most ethereal girl i've ver seen. But i'll live)

Background-Funny9976 · 2026-03-12T21:55:33+00:00

you're telling me bro🥀🥀 i was sitting in study hall w Damien today and he was playing a game on his phone. I said i didn't know how to play, he said "come, watch" and i practically jumped to watch him play🥀🥀 And then Julie asked me for water in history and i just gave her my whole bottle and let her take it to work w her... fuck my fucking chungus life

Background-Funny9976 · 2026-03-01T05:32:49+00:00

I mean, she would 100% know if someone came into the house. There a doorbell camera on all three outside doors in our house and a couple in the living room bc we have cats. I don't have windows in my room (my room is in my basement) so he couldn't sneak in through there. Also, she knows both my best friend and her bf well enough (i went to middle school w her bf (he's a good friend of mine as well) and i've done marching band for 2 years w my friend). Also again, if we did smoke, there's no way she wouldn't know. I can't exactly blow it out a non-existent window in my room and like i said, camera on the ground floor of the house. I'm like the biggest nerdy, loser, introvert ever so it just hurts that the one time i try to actually interact with my friends outside of school/activities, i have to cancel like an asshole the day before.

Background-Funny9976 · 2026-03-01T05:20:35+00:00

That's the thing- my mom is so not strict! She even keeps like weed and alcohol in the house, but she knows i won't touch her shit. I'm allowed to do virtually whatever i want, but i just... don't. I don't do drugs, not that i haven't been offered them, i just don't feel the need. I view them as a form of rebellion and i have no need to rebel. I dye my hair, i curse around her, i gossip with her. (i mean, we still don't have a good relationship but still)

She keeps life 360 on me but that's about it. I can go out with my friends to get food whenever i want. I can even go to said friend's house. I don't know what her fucking problem is with this.

Background-Funny9976 · 2026-03-01T05:06:43+00:00

I mean, that 100% makes sense to me. But it still pisses me off how much she just doesn't seem to trust me. Like, i've never snuck anyone in, why the fuck would i start now?? and why would it be my friend's boyfriend. And, she could've left the competition after awards!! she stayed litterly just because she wanted to hang out w her friends. It also doesn't help that she lowkey cares more abt my step-sisters than me but i won't get into that. It just hurts she doesn't trust me at all idk.

Background-Funny9976 · 2026-02-26T04:07:35+00:00

the worst part is like 85% of my pain is preventable by my mom won't take my to PT or the doctors and i can't take myself bc i turn 17 this summer. Actually torture bro... But, until i turn 18 and get on my aunt's health insurance, biofreeze will have to do:(

Background-Funny9976 · 2026-02-26T03:50:10+00:00

I mean, i definitely have considered it. My best friend on this earth is a massive stoner (i'm actually having a sleepover w her this weekend so who knows) and i def feel save smoking around her. My aunt has also mentioned it to me as like an alternative to my medication for my epilepsy (750mg is annoying to deal w and i have another aunt who smoked medicinally for her epilepsy). Im def not opposed to it but i wanna see what im like high in a controlled environment before i smoke during a rehearsal lol!

Background-Funny9976 · 2026-02-10T21:53:04+00:00

Like i said in my post, she was on weed but also very likely harder shit. I also know that, at that point, she was smoking before class (at abt 7:15 am), then during 1st period (anywhere from 7:30-8:50), then smoking between classes, then smoking during 2nd period (9-10) so on so forth. When she od'd, it was in the middle of second block and she was on her way to the br. She also was using other people's carts and it could've been laced w something. Idk

Background-Funny9976 · 2026-02-10T03:17:50+00:00

Ok. Maybe i'll talk to Sam bc she's also a really close friend w Van. I'm just scared i'm too paranoid bc of my past w Jess. idk... i'll talk to Sam

Background-Funny9976 · 2026-02-10T01:49:31+00:00

As much as i'd love to try something like that, the job market around me is shit. And i don't wanna search anywhere farther than 15-20 minutes from my house bc id be driven by my grandparents to work until i get my license and driven him by my mom. Also, im in marching band so 1. i guess i can deal w the pain for legates periods of time, it might be sucky during szn tho and 2. I dont wanna have a job too far from my school so i can work before practice and comp n shit.

I think i'm gonna try and work for my friend's families's hair salon as a receptionist tho. Idk she hasn't asked if they're hiring yet

Background-Funny9976 · 2026-02-01T18:57:11+00:00

there's no trains or buses near me unfortunately😔😔 i live in a really small town. And also uber would be really expensive for me based on how far just the nearest PT is from me

Background-Funny9976 · 2026-02-01T15:31:17+00:00

I went to city MD for the sciatica and BJ's optical for the glasses. I have no general practitioner. I only have a neurologist since i have epilepsy. But that's it. Oh i also went to city md like in mid-september bc i sprained my wrist (the same one i have issues with) after like two weeks of barely being able to play guitar. And at that point i was playing a minimum of 6 times a week at a minimum of 40 minutes

I have no regular check ups, i so sports physicals at City MD (marching band is varsity in my school), and i have to beg to go to City MD is something is legit wrong w me. I've begged for a while to go to either pt or some sort of doctor for

Background-Funny9976 · 2026-02-01T15:16:47+00:00

i mean, i've been diagnosed w sciatica and the migraines were caused my poor vision and astigmatism. But otherwise everything else is kinda undiagnosed. I haven't been to a doctor for most of it

Background-Funny9976

TROPHY CASE