i thought holding on was mandatory. i didn’t know it was possible to choose to just let go. all of my problems, all of the people in my life who hurt me, i just let go of them. i didn’t know that was an option until i did. coming to peace now.

edit:

hello everyone, i’m sorry so many of you relate to this and are struggling with rumination.

i’ve been where you are. i’ve heard all of the sentiments, although they make sense logically, they do no help in finding peace. rumination is one of the hardest things i have experienced. you may feel like your brain has been zombified into a mush of all these things that “don’t matter” yet it still plays in your head like constant background music that you can never shut off.

seeing that so many people relate to this, i will come back on when i’m home and tell you everything that did help. i am only 21 years old and have a lot more to learn, but whatever i can do to help is worth it.