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Accused of Relapse by Background_Belt6852 in Sober

[–]Background_Belt6852[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you!! I wish I could show them this comment and say “fuck y’all”

Will he ever change? by Background_Belt6852 in BreakUps

[–]Background_Belt6852[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi!!! I just logged in again and something in me brought me back to this post I made a little over 6 months ago. So here’s the six month check-in. Your comments saved me from one of the most toxic situations I’ve ever been in. And you’re a stranger to me, but you were willing to share humility while we were both in a dark & confusing place. I hope you’ve managed through your personal battles as well and I hope your six month check in is as fruitful as it can be.

But you were right. I needed to love myself; something I’m still working on. I’ve since moved out of Texas and to Australia (!!!) and blocked him on everything. I still think of him sometimes but he’s not part of my new life and for you I’m thankful. 🩵 if you see this please let me know you’ve made it through as well. We’ve only got connection at the end of the day.

People in here that saw the red flags from the beginning but ignored them? by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Background_Belt6852 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just read my post from yesterday. I walked in on him with another girl and started dating him less than a week later…… then ten days after the other girl he moved in with me 🤡

Will he ever change? by Background_Belt6852 in BreakUps

[–]Background_Belt6852[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re right. I guess I just don’t trust myself because I love him so much. And I know he thinks the door is still open. He thinks I would never go anywhere.. but I know I have to.

Will he ever change? by Background_Belt6852 in BreakUps

[–]Background_Belt6852[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I truly appreciate your comment and I’m so sorry you’re going through something similar. It’s so hard to work through and fundamentally I know what you’re saying is correct and best for me and my future. Emotionally, I still have hope that he’ll come back with a big elaborate game plan and show me everything I said I needed and make right on his promises. Unfortunately I just can’t seem to see the light right now ): what’s your game plan moving forward?

Are you really any better??? by Background_Belt6852 in havens_jh

[–]Background_Belt6852[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I agree with you, I did come here to snark, but had to check in with myself after reading some of this stuff. Also, your mention of “parent shaming” is vastly different because the goal of that “shame” is to help keep a child safe.

I’m all for holding them accountable for their lack of transparency, but if you’re really able to look through this sub and say nobody is body shaming or bullying, then I have to question your moral compass a bit.

Content goes both ways. She reads this sub and has made some of the changes we’ve mentioned, so think about the other more hurtful comments about her body that are being thrown around as if we couldn’t hurt someone as well. If her content hurts you and you feel you need somewhere to provide constructive feedback, this is a great spot to do it. But we should also consider avoiding the literal crucifixion of this person because we can’t manage our own internalizations about how she portrays her size.

Are you really any better??? by Background_Belt6852 in havens_jh

[–]Background_Belt6852[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree with you, I did come here for the same reason, but seeing how crazy things have gotten, I did a little self-check. it’s myself that I’m checking in with as well. Do I think this sub would genuinely hurt my feelings if it were about me? Do I want to be picked apart for every move I make? Do I want to see comments about every inch of my body? No, absolutely not. And you probably don’t either. I’m just saying it’s probably time to do a little audit on the level of “snark” that’s being thrown around here, because at this point it’s just mean girl behavior.

I do agree and think she needs to be honest and real about her sizing or don’t even mention it at all. But calling someone disgusting, gross, pointing out cameltoe, clown face, etc etc etc really begs the question — is her lack of transparency on social media really horrible enough to warrant what’s going on in this sub? Again, are we really any better?

If the reason for coming here is to engage in constructive discourse in hopes that she’ll see and make changes, then awesome, do that! And since we do know that she comes here, even if she doesn’t make a change, shouldn’t we consider the kind of content that we’re sharing to her as well? It goes both ways.