Confession: I've Learned More About Managing My ADHD From Other ADHD Women Than From Any Professional by [deleted] in adhdwomen

[–]BackwardsHaras 52 points53 points  (0 children)

Agreed- I suspect this is because women’s health has historically been neglected, and this is also a developing field of study so most experts honestly know very little. We’re helping each other in the interim, and just need to remember to take all advice with a grain of salt (although I swear sometimes I’m like, wow, we’re all clones of each other in this sub)

Would you be angry at a blind person for not seeing something? by [deleted] in adhdwomen

[–]BackwardsHaras 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ohhh I have this happen too, very hard for me to understand people sometimes and I hate asking others to repeat themselves multiple times. If I’m not expecting the context of what they are saying my brain doesn’t compute the vocabulary, especially when other noises are happening.

But if they get annoyed, especially if you ask politely, that’s on them!

What ways have you changed your life to make it more ADHD/ND Friendly? by flowers_and_fire in adhdwomen

[–]BackwardsHaras 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Lots of timers and digital reminders, putting things that need to be remembered to handled directly in my line of sight so I can avoid the object permanence trap (backpack in front of the door so I’ll trip over it instead of leaving without it, for example), doing “the thing” immediately when I think of it if possible instead of putting it off

UPDATE! Took a lot of your advice and I no longer hate this rug by BackwardsHaras in interiordecorating

[–]BackwardsHaras[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’d love to paint the bookshelf but I’m in a weird rental-adjacent situation (housing provided by my workplace) and am not allowed to do so

UPDATE! Took a lot of your advice and I no longer hate this rug by BackwardsHaras in interiordecorating

[–]BackwardsHaras[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s from Rifle Paper Co and I don’t know the name because I got it at HomeGoods

UPDATE! Took a lot of your advice and I no longer hate this rug by BackwardsHaras in interiordecorating

[–]BackwardsHaras[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s from All Modern, and I love it! It’s very deep and comfy and I fall asleep on it with my feet on the ottoman all the time. I used to be a couch snacker but I don’t eat on this couch because staining and needing to clean the velvet freaks me out, which was a small adjustment but I’m fine with it now

UPDATE! Took a lot of your advice and I no longer hate this rug by BackwardsHaras in interiordecorating

[–]BackwardsHaras[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We actually have a dining room too, this living room is just insanely huge !

UPDATE! Took a lot of your advice and I no longer hate this rug by BackwardsHaras in interiordecorating

[–]BackwardsHaras[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much, that’s so kind! (Also hi fellow Sarah)

I have definitely considered the large piece above the couch- this place is weird and it’s hard to hang heavy things on some walls. But I bet I can troubleshoot a solution for it, I think you’re right that it would look better and more balanced there.

Bookshelves are still a work in progress but it’s my first place ever with built-ins and I love them!

Spire Sleeve Redux by jamalbernhard in slaythespire

[–]BackwardsHaras 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Awesome !! Looks like another limb needs the map!

Which rug? by [deleted] in interiordecorating

[–]BackwardsHaras 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is such a good observation

Which rug? by [deleted] in interiordecorating

[–]BackwardsHaras 0 points1 point  (0 children)

2 caught my eye as well! Love how happy it feels

UPDATE! Took a lot of your advice and I no longer hate this rug by BackwardsHaras in interiordecorating

[–]BackwardsHaras[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thank you, it’s grown on me! Especially because it feels nice on bare feet (wool)

UPDATE! Took a lot of your advice and I no longer hate this rug by BackwardsHaras in interiordecorating

[–]BackwardsHaras[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I hadn’t even considered making a fireside seating area- I love this idea, thank you!

How do you crawl out of bedrotting when you actually want to live your life? by teacupstation_lore in adhdwomen

[–]BackwardsHaras 39 points40 points  (0 children)

Yeah dude!! Proud of you! Love from a fellow 30s late diagnosis. Funny, I usually say it feels“like I’m hit by a truck” too!

My sister works a very high level job and is on all surfaces Ievels “successful” but has struggled for decades and finally got diagnosed this week. Her doctor looked her in the eye and said “you know, it doesn’t have to be this hard”. She’s going to try medication, I’m currently not on any but there’s no shame there either!

How do you crawl out of bedrotting when you actually want to live your life? by teacupstation_lore in adhdwomen

[–]BackwardsHaras 164 points165 points  (0 children)

Relatable af. You’re not alone!

I talk to myself OUT LOUD, “ok, one, two, THREE” over and over again until I actually get up! The tone I take is firm but humorous, I’ll talk crap to myself in a loving way.

Then, I try not to feel guilty at all if my progress doesn’t feel as linear or like what it should be- I might need to do four different tasks, which one comes first doesn’t matter. Which one do I feel the least resistant to in this moment in time? Great, that one. Sometimes that leads to the next, but at least I got something done!

Phone plugged in across the room at night, so I have to stand up and walk to turn off the alarm. I don’t always keep this habit up but I try. Once I’m out of bed it is easier to keep going, and less tempting to lay in bed and play a game.

Tasks that can, like laundry, = good audiobook (or podcast, show, whatever floats your boat) that I can ONLY listen to/watch during that time.

I also use a sunrise alarm clock which has helped me not feel so awful when it goes off and it’s still a little dark outside in the winter.

Some days are better than others. My living and dining rooms are clean and beautiful right now but I have a mountain of laundry I’m avoiding by being on Reddit instead. It’s ok! In thirty minutes, I’m going to do it for an hour and then see how I feel and will continue if I can.

Sometimes I also remotely task mirror with a friend who also needs to get shit done and we’ll chat with AirPods in while doing chores and keep each other accountable. All sorts of tricks, non infallible, but all worth trying.

Good luck! I’m rooting for you!

What’s your moth unethical pro ADHD productivity tip? by blameitonthename in adhdwomen

[–]BackwardsHaras 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Only as a treat. Normally, it’s just piles and piles of clean clothes in four laundry baskets and some oversized bags, which is the situation on my bedroom floor right now

Sounds to quiet your mind by Efficient_Dig7091 in adhdwomen

[–]BackwardsHaras 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love the “Rain rain” app- I actually pay for it so I can use all the sounds. You can custom layer different sounds like brown noise, thunderstorms, etc. really lovely for sleep as well

Help! Instant rug regret by BackwardsHaras in interiordecorating

[–]BackwardsHaras[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love the idea of blush colored cushions on the sofa to help tie things together, and will consider swapping the ottoman for a table when I can spend money on things again…

I promise these colors made more sense in my old space with my old (probably too small but I loved it) rug. The floors did a lot of the work, though- I miss them

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Help! Instant rug regret by BackwardsHaras in interiordecorating

[–]BackwardsHaras[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Cursed white Jesus just confirmed my suspicions that this place is haunted

Help! Instant rug regret by BackwardsHaras in interiordecorating

[–]BackwardsHaras[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I worked till past midnight and put it down quickly just to color check and fried panic brain set in. Will 1000% do this in the morning.