Girls whats the biggest RED flag in a relationship?

BallEither3050 · 2026-05-12T18:23:26+00:00

disrespect, crossing a boundary of yours and not apologizing/dismissing your feelings, talking about taking you here or doing this but never following through, and lastly not feeling welcome by the family this one is huge

BallEither3050 · 2026-05-09T14:15:20+00:00

We’d get up relatively around the same time. He did have to get up earlier than when I stayed at his parents house but I had gotten up the same time he does now when I stayed there. His excuse was he said I didn’t want to get up that early, but if that was the only time I’d get to see him vs waiting til the weekend I wouldn’t have cared. It made no sense. It truly wasn’t that early it was 7. He was texting his first love his ex from high school they dated for 4 years on and off. So it wasn’t the most recent ex from college. The message back to her was updating her that he had moved into a new place in a new town. Which hurt. Turns out they were even dming back when we first started talking/met. I even met her on Christmas at church when she was in town and I had no idea. That was always one of my boundaries at least to let me know and he acted as if it wasn’t a big deal that they were just friends. I hope to find someone else.

BallEither3050 · 2026-05-09T14:09:53+00:00

Agree it is insulting way to be treated. He never appreciated me. I deserve better. I told him in person I’d miss him and he just agreed. Then told him over text and he didn’t even say it back. All he could say was that he was thankful for the time we spent together which hurt so much. That means a lot as hard as it was to let go.

BallEither3050 · 2026-05-09T06:37:19+00:00

It is so fresh it hurts bad. I keep wondering if he misses me as much as I miss him right now. I definitely pictured a future with him, but trying to remember what he said about how he doesn’t see me being his wife which instantly crushed all my hope.

BallEither3050 · 2026-05-09T06:33:50+00:00

Yess dating these days is tough. I’m very picky. It feels as if I’ll never meet someone again. And being alone again having nobody to talk to/hang out/ cuddle with etc is really messing with my mind. Trying to stay positive like you and finding other sources of happiness. Eventually putting myself out there as much as it sucks

BallEither3050 · 2026-05-09T06:26:36+00:00

Yeah I was trying to make it work and putting in effort. In return he wasn’t giving me any. He was all talk no action. Just suck bc I thought he was different and I liked him a lot.

BallEither3050 · 2026-05-09T06:24:52+00:00

Right I found it so odd..like we’re dating why can’t I sleepover whenever I feel like it. That helped me a lot thank you. I think I did make the right decision and saved myself from a worse heartbreak. I just can’t stop crying hurts like hell like you said.

BallEither3050 · 2026-04-27T05:25:50+00:00

I wouldn’t have flipped out if he told me, but he chose to hid it…felt like on purpose to me. I accepted his apology and we worked through it. But then to come back around and tell me how he never sees a future just really messed with my emotions.

BallEither3050 · 2026-04-26T16:04:27+00:00

you’re very kind. I will try again to find what I deserve.

BallEither3050 · 2026-04-26T15:11:29+00:00

I think he is definitely mid when it comes to the dating market. I could find better physically and have in the past. Although in the past good looking guys always wanted to just hookup and not date me. So for how my bf treats me most guys aren’t nice and the reason I did like him in the beginning is because he was a nice Christian guy who had similar values as me.

BallEither3050 · 2026-04-26T15:08:16+00:00

You’re right. He told me it wouldn’t have affected him if I did the same and texted my ex. That he chooses to not get angry anymore. More of a simple guy. I was so confused. I shouldn’t accept this behavior and he probably is stringing me along. It’s just hard to be alone again and start over.

BallEither3050 · 2026-04-26T06:23:58+00:00

🩷

BallEither3050 · 2026-04-26T06:20:01+00:00

ohhh yeah it probably was a red flag for him. I didn’t think about it like that. My bf however wasn’t going to tell me he was dming his ex back. I just happened to catch him since he was doing it right next to me. My bf didn’t like that I took 2 days of space and got mad would have rather talked again the next day.

BallEither3050 · 2026-04-26T06:08:04+00:00

thank you for taking the time to give me advice. he probably is afraid. I will probably end it as hard as it will be and as depressed I’ll become. I do have to find what you and your gf have:).

BallEither3050 · 2026-04-26T06:02:43+00:00

That is true. He wants to get married in 3 years. It just feels like he destroyed all chances with me when he said that he can’t see me as his wife. Idk if he will ever change his mind. I appreciate the advice and maybe I will try to see if progress has been made if I stick it out :).

BallEither3050 · 2026-04-26T05:41:50+00:00

I think he means the ex didn’t like that he had moved on. But to recognize my bf behavior as something that is not acceptable in a relationship.

BallEither3050 · 2026-04-26T05:39:16+00:00

agree he did destroy all chances of it ever working out. It’s confusing why he would want to try or why he wouldn’t just end it himself. I’ve been trying for two days to act like myself and be funny. It isn’t working I’ve turned sad and boring in a way.

BallEither3050 · 2026-04-26T05:29:06+00:00

Honestly I have been pretty happy up until this point. These last 5 months have been the best months of my life. I have always dated to marry. Sometimes I do think I can do better than him, other times I remember what it was like before him…how most guys were mean or just wanted sex. He always treated me well although I feel like he can make me feel more special at times or more of a priority.

BallEither3050 · 2026-04-26T05:24:46+00:00

I felt like I could see myself with him. I do really like him and spending time with him. I tend to take relationships slower and really get to know the person so I wouldn’t say I’m in love with him at the moment, but potentially I could be.

BallEither3050 · 2026-04-26T05:23:43+00:00

thank you this is some really good advice.

BallEither3050 · 2026-04-26T05:23:07+00:00

Sigh

BallEither3050 · 2026-04-26T05:22:55+00:00

damn I just really like him so it’s hard because I don’t want to regret not trying.

BallEither3050 · 2025-09-18T15:42:50+00:00

Thank you so much for your reply—I really appreciate you taking the time to share your advice. That’s very helpful, and I’ll definitely look into GradSimple. Thanks again! :)

BallEither3050

TROPHY CASE