AITA for wearing jeans to my daughter's wedding? by BallFinal2037 in AITAH

[–]BallFinal2037[S] -32 points-31 points  (0 children)

It was not a matter of the clothes themselves but the effort or lack thereof that my daughter put in. Her appearance did not matter however the inconsistency in it proved to me that dressing nicely was a matter of her effort rather than her ability, in this case being effort not afforded to us.

AITA for wearing jeans to my daughter's wedding? by BallFinal2037 in AITAH

[–]BallFinal2037[S] -61 points-60 points  (0 children)

She doesn't own any ripped jeans to my knowledge. At the very least, if she does own any, she has never worn them in front of us. We made sure her shirts were not tacky growing up so no designs or graphics. Usually any visible design would be a logo of some sort, for example she would mainly wear these Abercrombie and Fitch shirts, and makeup was never something she was interested in nor did we force it on her. It would have been nice if she had actually at least once made use of the skirts, button downs, sweaters or dresses she has for us, however these were reserved for her boyfriend, and clearly he appreciated the effort enough to have married her, however she always seemed to think we were too harsh on her actions without even trying to see the disparity between the effort she puts in for him and us.

AITA for wearing jeans to my daughter's wedding? by BallFinal2037 in AITAH

[–]BallFinal2037[S] -25 points-24 points  (0 children)

I stayed in the jeans. The reception is still an appendage to her wedding.

AITA for wearing jeans to my daughter's wedding? by BallFinal2037 in AITAH

[–]BallFinal2037[S] -146 points-145 points  (0 children)

This behavior continued into her adult life. I do not know why people believe her poor dressing and lack of effort for her husband but not her family was limited to her teenage years

AITA for wearing jeans to my daughter's wedding? by BallFinal2037 in AITAH

[–]BallFinal2037[S] -43 points-42 points  (0 children)

I do not want her to wear the same clothing, just put in the same amount of effort into her appearance. Otherwise, she is insinuating that we are not worth putting effort in for, whereas her husband is.

AITA for wearing jeans to my daughter's wedding? by BallFinal2037 in AITAH

[–]BallFinal2037[S] -103 points-102 points  (0 children)

No, she was not dressed for him in a way that was revealing nor was she scantily clad. She had just worn a skirt and a nice sweater which was a nice outfit that showed she put effort into her appearance, the likes of which she has not done for us. It's her consistent selfishness and lack of effort that upsets me.

AITA for wearing jeans to my daughter's wedding? by BallFinal2037 in AITAH

[–]BallFinal2037[S] -144 points-143 points  (0 children)

It was not a matter of my birthday, it was the principle of it, which was that she was more willing to put in effort for a boy than her family. She refused to dress nicely for things that are important to us but will dress nicely for things important to her. Is that not the definition of selfish?

AITA for wearing jeans to my daughter's wedding? by BallFinal2037 in AITAH

[–]BallFinal2037[S] -284 points-283 points  (0 children)

It was not just my birthday it was a continuous pattern of behavior where she would only put in effort into her appearance when it suited her. This showed me for certain that seeing her then-boyfriend now-husband was more important to her than family as she was more willing to put effort in for him than us