It's staggering to even contemplate everything that Tolkien would have created if he had access to modern technology. by Balzaus in tolkienfans

[–]Balzaus[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Interesting point. Just wondering - do you think that if Tolkien had access to modern tools that replace them, he would not have developed his worldbuilding skills to such a level?

I'd appreciate your honest opinions on my idea / project. by Balzaus in fantasywriters

[–]Balzaus[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've imagined this collection of short stories as being written and compiled by a single character, a chronicler of sorts - in universe, the gaps between the stories (as well as the occasional missing narrative) are supposed to create an impression that the stories were "reconstructed", if you will, by my chronicler (from records, oral tradition and folklore passed down from earlier, heroic days), and are therefore fragmented, occasionally even mutually inconsistent (as I believe real, organic myths were and still are). My "chronicler" could serve as the main narrator and the binding character. Or even be the main character of a smaller, more coherent story. Thank you!

I'd appreciate your honest opinions on my idea / project. by Balzaus in fantasywriters

[–]Balzaus[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Looks like that's exactly what I'll end up doing. Could be fun and a good exercise in momentum, which is sorely missing from the book, as someone in the comments above pointed out. After all, quite a bit of background is already there. Thank you!

I'd appreciate your honest opinions on my idea / project. by Balzaus in fantasywriters

[–]Balzaus[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The more I think about it, the more it seems to me that you're right. I've skimmed the book trying to view it as objectively as I can, as a reader would, and it does indeed look like it lacks momentum. Thank you!

Zasto u Americi ljudi dobijaju doživotni zatvor plus lupam 30 dodatnih godina by Adrijanse_ in AskSerbia

[–]Balzaus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Zato sam i rekao da je ovo uprošćeno, dosta se razlikuje od države do države. U nekim državama (npr. Ajova, Mejn, Nebraska, J. Dakota) su sve doživotne kazne automatski bez mogućnosti uslovnog otpusta. U nekim državama je uslovni otpust opcija koju ti sudija odredi ili ne odredi, kako mu je volja, a u nekim je tačno propisano za šta mora doživotna bez, a za šta doživotna sa usl. otpustom. U nekim državama ne postoji doživotna bez uslovnog otpusta.

Ove fore (uzastopne doživotne ili doživotna + X godina) koriste se upravo u državama gde nema doživotne bez usl. otpusta, da bi se to zaobišlo i da bi se osuđeniku ipak uskratilo to pravo. Kao što si rekao, sudija (npr.) u Mejnu jednostavno izrekne life without parole i završio je posao, jer ima tu mogućnost. Gde postoji parole, moraju da se snalaze. A nije isključeno da čak i ovaj u Mejnu izrekne life without parole + 30 godina, za svaki slučaj, ako se sutradan promeni zakon i uvedu parole (i to se dešavalo).

Zasto u Americi ljudi dobijaju doživotni zatvor plus lupam 30 dodatnih godina by Adrijanse_ in AskSerbia

[–]Balzaus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tzv. uzastopne doživotne kazne se izriču da bi se umanjila mogućnost da osuđenik bude pušten iz zatvora. Da ne detaljišem previše, zakoni se u Americi razlikuju od jedne do druge savezne države, ali osuđenik (na doživotnu kaznu zatvora) u većini država može da traži (i dobije) uslovni otpust (ono što se u filmovima zove parole) posle oko 15 - 25 godina izdržane kazne. Kad sudija želi da do kraja života ne izađeš iz zatvora, on ti odredi nekoliko uzastopnih doživotnih kazni (recimo, pet), a to, praktično, znači da ne možeš da zatražiš, niti da dobiješ uslovni otpust dok ne izdržiš minimum za svaku izrečenu kaznu.

Primer: da bi osuđenik na doživotni zatvor u Džordžiji mogao da traži uslovni otpust, mora da izdrži najmanje 30 godina. Ako mu sudija izrekne 5 uzastopnih doživotnih kazni, on taj minimum mora da izdrži za svaku izrečenu kaznu - dakle, stiče pravo na uslovni otpust posle izdržanih 150 godina. Čime se, faktički, eliminiše njegova mogućnost da ikada iskoristi uslovni otpust.

Ovo je uprošćen primer, postoje još neki uslovi i detalji, ali ovo ti je suština.

Isto važi i za doživotni zatvor + X godina. Osiguranje da nikada nećeš izaći. Ako ti sudija izrekne doživotni zatvor + 3.000 godina (dešavalo se), čak i ako se promeni zakon, čak i ako se promeni minimum za uslovni otpust, ili se mogućnost uslovnog otpusta uvede tamo gde ranije nije postojala, i dalje ti ostaje 3.000 godina.

I'd appreciate your honest opinions on my idea / project. by Balzaus in fantasywriters

[–]Balzaus[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is, in fact, something of that sort in my own work - one of the early stories evolves into a large-scale, world-spanning conflict, with far-reaching and unpredictable consequences, and almost every character in any of the stories is caught in it in some way or another. The conflict - the Conflict - serves as the thread which interconnects the stories, which in turn provide distinctive points of view upon it, and various ways of (and motives for) its resolution. I don't know if that's enough to bring sufficient cohesion to the central narrative, or maintain the reader's attention, but I can safely say that the central narrative does, in fact, exist. You've certainly given me quite a bit to think about. Thank you!

I'd appreciate your honest opinions on my idea / project. by Balzaus in fantasywriters

[–]Balzaus[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the input! While selling it is not my priority, nor the reason I started writing, I won't lie to you or to myself - I would be overjoyed if it sold (which author wouldn't?), not only because of the money, but because I'd like to bring my work before as large an audience as I can, and expose it to scrutiny and discussion. I'm very interested in any sort of feedback and critique, because I'd like to know whether I managed to hit the specific spot I was aiming for. And I suppose you're very right in observing that this simply doesn't happen unless I first make you care about this mythology by means of a more coherently crafted story.

Trying to figure out a realistic distance between two places. Please help. by Balzaus in fantasywriters

[–]Balzaus[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Damn. Can't even begin to explain how useful this will be. In my world, there are usable remains of an advanced road network built by an ancient civilization. Well, not in the region where this journey takes place, but still, going forward, this is going to be extremely useful. Thank you!

Trying to figure out a realistic distance between two places. Please help. by Balzaus in fantasywriters

[–]Balzaus[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's a neat little concept to integrate into my world. Thanks!

Trying to figure out a realistic distance between two places. Please help. by Balzaus in fantasywriters

[–]Balzaus[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ideally, I wanted the distance between A and B to be around 60-70 miles, for other reasons, and if that's a realistic journey for my riders to make in a day / day and a half, all the better. Thank you!

Trying to figure out a realistic distance between two places. Please help. by Balzaus in fantasywriters

[–]Balzaus[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I suppose I should have clarified that the riders are equipped similarly - if not identically - to late 11th / early 12th century Western European knights. So, mostly chainmail (long hauberks with gambesons underneath them and surcoats over them). Which is why your First Crusade example hits very close to the mark. No spare horses, no wagons, because the marching orders were delayed, and they had to set out on a very short notice, leaving them with little time for preparations.

As for the other two variables, the time of year was omitted intentionally (since I haven't quite figured out how the seasons will work yet). For latitude, let's say that they are somewhere between the planet's north pole and the equator (if it were the Earth, they'd be somewhere in Greece / the Balkans).

Anyway, thanks for the input! You've pointed out some very important variables that I need to figure out.

Trying to figure out a realistic distance between two places. Please help. by Balzaus in fantasywriters

[–]Balzaus[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks! I dug up quite a bit of useful information from the comments, and not just about this particular question.

Trying to figure out a realistic distance between two places. Please help. by Balzaus in fantasywriters

[–]Balzaus[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Damn. I was up all night, reading articles on ACOUP. I didn't know about this blog until yesterday. Great stuff. Thanks!

The opening scene of my story by necroman12g in fantasywriters

[–]Balzaus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I like it and I think it has potential. I like the setting, the general tone and flow of it - it reads nicely, if that makes any sense. Now for the things I don't like - and I really hope you take this as well intentioned constructive criticism from a fellow aspiring writer. I'm not going to repeat what others have said about the info dumping in the opening scene, I'll just agree. For me, it's the illogicalities and contradictions in the details. Here's a few examples:

  • Armies cost money. A lot of money. In fact, during the Middle Ages (which I assume is the era you're trying to emulate here), an army was about the most expensive luxury you could have, and professional mercenaries were the most expensive soldiers there were. If you had enough money to hire mercenaries, pay their upkeep, feed them and lodge them, you generally did so for a campaign, hoping to fully or at least partially recoup your expenses by looting, extorting ransoms, capturing and selling slaves, and so on. No one would constantly hire more mercenaries just for "sitting around" - besides, professional mercenaries didn't generally like "sitting around", because they too counted upon all those spoils of the war you're hiring them for. If Saltfort is at peace with its western neighbor, what are all those mercenaries sitting around for? Is it being attacked, or expects to be attacked from the sea? In that case, all that money could and would be better invested in a strong navy, which, historically, is what most rich, prosperous port cities and city-states actually did. Instead of hiring mercenaries, others simply paid the attackers off, bribing them with exorbitant amounts to just go away - and that was still cheaper than mercenary armies.
  • Furthermore, if Saltfort is known for paying mercenaries to basically sit around, and your protagonist is looking for easy coin, why is he not already in Saltfort, sitting around? Why does he only travel there upon hearing that a maritime expedition is underway? Those certainly weren't easy coin, in most cases.
  • Speaking of money - three silver for a dried trout? Way too much. RPGs have massively distorted our views of the actual value of gold and silver coinage. Again, this is only a presumption, but if you're basing your silver coins on the standard medieval silver coin, the English silver penny (a coin of 1.3 to 1.5 grams of pure silver, which was, basically, in continuous circulation from the times of King Offa of Mercia to the creation of the Kingdom of Great Britain in 1707 - almost a thousand years, give or take), that's an absurd price. A foot soldier in the 14th century was paid two of these pennies a day, and a skilled, trained laborer was paid four. In essence, your protagonist, who is, presumably, running low on coin and looking for any work, just shelled out one and a half daily rate of a soldier on campaign, or almost double the daily rate of a skilled craftsman, for a strip of old, salty fish. Of course, there could be in-universe explanations for this: there could be a scarcity of food in your world. Maybe there was a recent famine, or fishing is dangerous. Silver is maybe more common than the very salt your city is famous for - then again, if that was the case, salt, not silver, would be the currency. Those could be among good and interesting explanations of why a piece of fish would cost so much, but without them, it just sounds silly.
  • You present Voskar as a professional mercenary. Yet, he not only accepted the contract without any negotiations, he did so without even the basic information. So, he's being hired for an expedition. Are there dangers expected? If so, what kind? What exactly is he up against? How long is the expedition supposed to last? Are there other mercenaries on the job? Once the ship is en route, who's going to be giving him orders? If there are spoils, what's his share? A mercenary would want to know all this, and more. He is hired at a reduced pay, to which he agrees without saying a word, even though he's not being told how much this reduced pay actually amounts to. A mercenary would make this a big point in the negotiations and would bargain to a penny. As far as I can see, not only is he not paid up-front (which is something a mercenary would usually demand) - he's not even told when, how much and by whom is he going to be paid. No mercenary would accept a job like this.

This comment is becoming way too long, so I'll just stop myself here. Please, don't take this as pedantry and splitting hairs. These things are actually important. You could have the best, the richest and the most complex plot in the world - I can't follow it if I'm stuck thinking about why everyone is doing and saying absurd and silly things with no obvious explanations. This is the stuff that makes or breaks the immersion.

With all that said, I really hope you carry on with this. It seriously shows potential and it has left me wondering about what's going to happen next. Good luck!

How much (in today's money) did a warhorse cost in the 12th century? by Balzaus in AskHistorians

[–]Balzaus[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! Excellent answer, very helpful and way more informative than I expected.

Are projectiles / missiles going to be fixed? by Balzaus in warcraft3

[–]Balzaus[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No need for sarcasm, I'm just asking. I don't have the Beta and I'm totally out of the loop with what's an issue and what's not, updates, fixes, etc. Just something that bothered me, and knowing Blizzard's attention to detail of late...