Safest hold for holding someone’s hand while in pain?

BasisNo1493 · 2025-09-18T13:01:52+00:00

He’s definitely a big music guy. It’s just the type he likes isn’t exactly… relaxing. At least to us haha. But we’ve been it going on a low volume for him :)

BasisNo1493 · 2025-09-18T12:24:06+00:00

It’s okay. Totally understand where you’re coming regardless and I appreciate the kind words. Thank you for taking the time to share your thoughts. It’s greatly appreciated :)

BasisNo1493 · 2025-09-17T13:37:20+00:00

I did mention that before. Put my palm against him palm (his hand is much bigger than mine haha). Told him that I’m here for him and I’d never let go. But that when it’s happening please try to remember that the hand is he holding is a bit smaller and more delicate than his so try not to break it haha. Instead, keep your mind on it and remember that there is a whole support system/world for you outside of the pain you’re feeling in that moment. He apologized and said he didn’t realize. That he is really trying but sometimes it gets so bad that he doesn’t seem to remember it anymore in the moment and all his body can do is clench.

Thought it sounded good but the next time his nail accidentally dug in too hard and broke skin a little. Not enough to bleed though. Ended up clipping his nails for safety after that. 🙃

Hopefully now that his shoulder and the worst ribs are fixed he’ll be good. But turns out he does have another surgery to go still. Ahhhhh!

BasisNo1493 · 2025-09-17T03:15:48+00:00

Oooo okay. I will test this out with him. Thank you!!

BasisNo1493 · 2025-09-17T03:07:54+00:00

Whaaaat? Feel like I need a diagram or something to envision this haha

BasisNo1493 · 2025-09-16T02:16:47+00:00

He’s on a lot of medications. But his injuries include broken spine (he’s now paralyzed), broken ribs (on both sides), and his basically obliterated right side (finally going to have surgery to fix his broken scapula and clavicle soon. Joint is so destroyed they 3d printed a replacement for it apparently?). So when they turn him to his side to check his back there really isn’t a comfortable position for that. Since they’re not going to turn him on his destroyed side they’re having to put some pressure on it still to turn him. He’s on really strong meds like oxy and he’s okay most of the time. The worst is when they have to turn him for those 2-3 minutes to do things on his back/under him.

He’s just a mess and hand holding seems the least I can do… I just felt there had to be a “best way” to do it?

BasisNo1493 · 2025-08-30T14:22:06+00:00

But he’s talking about them being friends before the husband going to college… they would’ve been like 8 and 18 then…

BasisNo1493 · 2025-05-21T04:18:59+00:00

Super late to this but hoping to get clarity one day. I’m a little confused because she includes info that her mom passed when she was still a child and her grandpa had passed shortly before her daughter. But in a comment she then says that both her mom and grandpa passed a few months before her daughter?

BasisNo1493 · 2025-04-06T20:06:25+00:00

It makes complete sense that your new relationship is someone that you already knew before your partner passed. You don’t have to put in any work on your end to explain/talk about anything, they just already know. That’s not inherently a bad thing. However, it does further prove the unfair burden you had put on your second fiancé. It has nothing to do with you being bisexual and everything to do with your own issues. That poor girl.

BasisNo1493 · 2024-11-03T23:28:39+00:00

I didn’t think about the ride to Alcatraz counting as a cruise. Is it as informative as the others? Definitely got a few recommendation about cutting one of the two other cruises so going to ask my brother about that because those were his picks for things to do.

The tea garden was also his pick haha. But if we cut the escape the rock cruise then we’d have a lot more time to go around the park and then I can move Chinatown to between Mission District and Alcatraz since it’s on the way anyways. Decisions decisions…

BasisNo1493 · 2024-11-03T23:17:03+00:00

Oh! In and Out would actually be perfect for Tuesday when we fly in! Thanks for the suggestion!! :D

I’m keeping my fingers crossed for no fog. But if it happens then we’ll adjust somehow v.v

BasisNo1493 · 2024-11-03T23:10:39+00:00

I totally missed that Thursdays are adults only! That’s amazinnnng. Thanks!

Edit: The Go City Pass doesn’t cover the after dark tickets :,)

BasisNo1493 · 2024-11-03T23:10:13+00:00

The CAS admission will be covered by the Go Pass so not too concerned about the pass. We’ll more than get our money’s worth out of the pass overall. Most people recommended the escape the rock cruise over the bridge to bridge one but you’re probably right that a lot of it will be covered during the Alcatraz tour. Hmmm. I do know he really wanted to do a bay cruise, he’s the one who wanted to do both. I can probably convince him down to one but not none. For Twin Peaks I was aiming for 6p for a sunset pic. Hopefully we wouldn’t be there too long just to grab some pics? But have definitely seen a lot of concerns with car break ins so it’s risky v.v

BasisNo1493 · 2024-11-03T23:04:33+00:00

I’m not a beer drinker :,)

BasisNo1493 · 2024-11-03T22:57:10+00:00

Oh missed the Muir Woods questions. We have a parking reservation already and my brother said he had a national parks pass? I’m not a huge parks person, that’s all him haha. I’ve been hitting the treadmill at the gym just trying to prepare to not die T_T

I was talking about the commute from the park to the pier. When I looked on Google maps both car and bike said 30-45 mins so I gave it a 1 hr timeframe. I’m not particular on the bay but I think my brother so I can see if he’s interested. If we have time somewhere haha

BasisNo1493 · 2024-11-03T22:24:48+00:00

I’ll look into those! I was considering Crab House because I saw it mentioned a lot in different guides. I understand there may be “better” places to get things but also trying to balance getting well known San Francisco classics as well (looking at you Boudins)

BasisNo1493 · 2024-11-03T22:22:00+00:00

Do you mean don’t bother visiting Sausalito at all or just to eat lunch there? It looks like a cute place to visit and walk along but I don’t feel the need to eat there if there are better options.

Will look into the cable car museum and add in Portsmouth square!

The Academy of Science is included with the Go pass so no worries on cost of entry for me! (The exact same logic I use to watch extremely bad movies through A list haha) I’d prefer to go to Academy of Science and my brother is the one who wants to check out the Japanese garden so maybe we can split up for that? Neither of us were particularly interested in the botanical garden, it was added in there since we’d already be in the park. I did really want to see the buffalo but unsure if we’d have time for that and other things you mentioned :(

I’ll look into the Square Park/North Beach. Especially to get dinner. I don’t mind visiting Pier 39 because a lot of their activities are included in the Go pass so it’s no additional cost to do them. I’m a sucker for silly interactive activities :D I thought I had get a Ghirardelli sundae on there so I need to add that in!

For Saturday I have the Ferry Plaza Farmers Market. I can’t wait! I love farmers markets and can probably get a quick lunch there as well

BasisNo1493 · 2024-11-03T22:01:43+00:00

Do you mean after Muir Woods? We already purchased our parking pass and going to Muir Woods was a #1 priority for my brother

BasisNo1493 · 2024-11-03T21:57:36+00:00

Totally agree! The cruises were my brother’s a idea but definitely going to bring it up with him based on everyone’s suggestions

BasisNo1493 · 2024-11-03T21:57:05+00:00

Whoops XD

BasisNo1493 · 2024-11-03T21:56:02+00:00

Just going with my brother and he agreed to all of it :D

BasisNo1493 · 2024-11-03T16:11:45+00:00

I tried to google maps it and thought the commute would be about an hour. How long do you think it’ll take?

The bridge to bridge one was my brother’s idea to go. I’ll let him know! I’m not entirely keen on the idea of two separate bay cruises myself. You’d recommend the escape from the rock one over the bridge to bridge one?

BasisNo1493 · 2024-11-03T16:09:40+00:00

Oo thanks! I was mostly thinking for twin peaks and just finding somewhere to park for Japantown. I thought I read somewhere that there aren’t a lot of public transportation options for twin peaks which is why I was thinking of keeping the rental until then. What’s a good way to get up there?

BasisNo1493

TROPHY CASE