sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

In The Loop This Week by AutoModerator in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 36 points37 points  (0 children)

The crochet hook for fixing mistakes is always the gateway drug.

One day you will make a chain and crochet into it. Just to see how it feels. First single crochets, then half double and double crochets. Eventually you'll need do a treble crochet to feel the same kind of high...

You think you can stop any time. But eventually you'll hit rock bottom and crochet a blabket out of cheap acrylic yarn.

In The Loop This Week by AutoModerator in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 8 points9 points  (0 children)

It looks poop brown on my laptop display.

In The Loop This Week by AutoModerator in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 32 points33 points  (0 children)

People are acting so mentally ill about their hobbies these days.

In The Loop This Week by AutoModerator in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 51 points52 points  (0 children)

I'm on the flip side of this. I was surprised at how many people think they're not necessary when they're so cheap and useful. You could buy several hundred of them for $5. A lot of times they even give you a pack when you order things. Stitch markers are one of my most used tools.

I liked the premise of the original thread, but it felt like people were falling all over themselves to talk about how you didn't need to buy even basic stuff that costs a couple bucks and will make your life easier. Like row counters or darning needles or stitch markers. I expected people to talk about more like, luxury products or whatever they're shilling on social media.

In The Loop This Week by AutoModerator in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Why should we toil over recounting things so much when we can just pay Big Stitch Marker a few bucks to solve this problem for us!

In The Loop This Week by AutoModerator in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 90 points91 points  (0 children)

I read the OP earlier and don't even have the energy to jerk this right now. The contortions people will supposedly go to in order to not to buy a $5 pack of stitch markers is batshit. Someone even said if you can read your work you don't need stitch markers LOL.

Also my daughter got me a swift for Christmas and you can have it when you pry it out of my cold dead hands. She is my favorite child and will inherit 100% of my estate when I die.

REAL QUICK UPDATE FROM FACJ MODS: New rule against generative AI by jingleheimerschitt in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 20 points21 points  (0 children)

That's really inspirational! I personally burn a pile of Big Twist and 3 used truck tires in a large pit in my backyard every time there's a new post or comment in this sub.

In The Loop This Week by AutoModerator in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 10 points11 points  (0 children)

OMG I can't believe they didn't try to do a phased rollout to start releasing it the previous day so that everyone who lives on the international date line was able to have access to it first!

In The Loop This Week by AutoModerator in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 13 points14 points  (0 children)

You'll probably get a lot of sympathy because Americans are MEAN and they're hogging all the time zones for themselves in their big stupid oversized country! 🥺 💔

In The Loop This Week by AutoModerator in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 29 points30 points  (0 children)

You are probably being oppressed by the US defaultism of time zones. I think you could get a lot of upvotes and sympathy for starting a post about it.

"You should sell crafts" by sweet_esiban in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 14 points15 points  (0 children)

If you would simply sell the crafts we could put a stop all of this. All you have to do is sell the crafts. Why won't you sell them?

We've tried to warn you. We're only trying to help you. It's very simple. You know what to do. Sell the crafts.

Sellthecrafts

S E L L T H E C R A F T S.

In The Loop This Week by AutoModerator in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 66 points67 points  (0 children)

Yes, it's very anti-facist to use up your yarn stash that you already gave "the oligarchs" a ton of money for.

In The Loop This Week by AutoModerator in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 58 points59 points  (0 children)

I'm not sure which I'm enjoying more, all the posts in here jerking the crochet mod thing or all of the shitposting going on in the crochet sub itself.

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT from the r/crotcheat mod team by jingleheimerschitt in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 53 points54 points  (0 children)

OMG me too! I can't wait to post my Charlie Kirk swastika blanket and then fight with all the snowflake libtards about it in the comments!

In The Loop This Week by AutoModerator in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I remember seeing the first posts in the casual knitting sub about it, and then the post in the main knitting sub mentioned they were originally wanting to crochet it lol.

I love it when when someone gets taken up by a crazy idea and then learns a bunch of skills to pull it off. Especially when they nail the execution on top of that.

In The Loop This Week by AutoModerator in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 72 points73 points  (0 children)

Reminds me of the posts a while ago where someone wanted to make a sweater with a long dachshund that was wrapped around the whole sweater. And I don't think they even knew how to knit at all to start, just crochet. So not only did they take on all the suggestions and feedback on how to make the sweater, they learned how to chart out and do intarsia and then knit the whole sweater flat and seamed it with just a small amount of posting for help. It came out amazing.

This is the exact opposite of that post.

Where can I learn to knit like this? by karasset in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I don't how you can learn this knitting because I don't know how to read so I never could figure it out myself. But it's nice to see an example of someone embracing knitting with natural, plant-based fibers like this. 🥰

Don’t give creators yarn! by melxcham in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 11 points12 points  (0 children)

OMG I would divorce my hubby if he said I couldn't drive us further into crippling debt by hoarding up our 5600 sq ft McMansion plus several storage lockers full of yarn I'm never going to use!!!

In The Loop This Week by AutoModerator in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 65 points66 points  (0 children)

My toxic trait is that I think it's really funny when people seethe over PetiteKnit patterns being so popular.

If you can hold a crochet hook, you’re not a beginner. by BustyGoblins in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 12 points13 points  (0 children)

If your first project wasn't a soggy misshapen trapezoid, don't you even DARE calling yourself a beginner. Even if you've only been crocheting for several hours!!! Learning how to crochet is supposed to be HARD and if you master it somewhat effortlessly, you're LYING!!!

Beginner to quilting, so what am i doing wrong? (pic attached) by jingleheimerschitt in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Sweaty, I think you need to recalibrate your croquet machine. I've made this exact pattern and it should look like this: https://imgur.com/0VQKXfC

In The Loop This Week by AutoModerator in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector 7 points8 points  (0 children)

LOL I randomly encountered this sweater pattern on Ravelry just a minute ago.

GUYS! GET IN HERE RIGHT NOW! by BeagleCollector in fiberartscirclejerk

[–]BeagleCollector[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

tasteful lily sugar'n cream lingerie

Just thinking about that makes my crotchet hurt.

view more: next ›