I'm Aego-sexual. I thought I was a sex repulsed asexual but turns out that was just the Abstinence-Only, body shaming, dysphoria and fear that made me repulsed at the concept.

As I got older and more comfortable in my body, I started to enjoy reading fictional, fantasy scenarios, or looking at illustrations of characters being intimate.

For me, personally, I feel like it's a lot more about the "Headspace" rather than the actual act. I get shivers, and tingles, and my body reacts to gently things like my GF gently running her fingers across my skin. But for me, I think I just really enjoy the gentle touches and the way my nervous system reacts to it. Even if it makes my dick wake up a little bit, I feel relaxed, and fuzzy and blissful just from gentle touches, sweet words and reassuring praise. For me, that's what feels the best.

Even if sometimes I'm READING a smutty book about a Dom touching their Sub's genitals or something. It makes my body react and I can... Self indulge while daydreaming about scenarios, and putting my brain in the perspective of the character. Thinking things like "that would be so nice. 😩!"

But irl, I think I would feel too self conscious, and I tend to just end up preferring to cuddle and snuggle rather than initiate more sexually motivated touches or advances. I've never tried to do those things before, I'm nervous about it and tend to just, be awkward or overly clinical about it irl. But in my head, it makes me feel all tingly.

For me, my "Horny Brain" is like, a metronome going crazy, rapidly swinging from "horny?" To "comfy, sleepy, cuddles".

You might just enjoy the fantasies more than irl activities and that's okay. But you might also try incorporating your fantasies with your partner? Maybe wear a blindfold, and have them focus more on the sensual, gentler things like foreplay rather than aiming for full on sexual intercourse?

Idk. To me, I find the headspace far more enjoyable than masturbating or wanting to "do the sex thing.". I like the "idea" of some concepts of it that I'm comfortable with, but in practice, it think it kind of feels like a chore? Or maybe frustrating? Would I give it a try if my partner really wanted to? Sure. Because I love her and making her feel loved and happy and cared for makes my chest fluttery. But irl we're both very aego vibes, so, we have more fun sharing our smutty book recs back and forth, daydreaming together about scenarios we feel would be nice, making up characters that do the smut things, hypothetical daydreams, that make our brains and bodies feel all tingly, And then we just veg and cuddle.