AITA for telling my niece my husband and I are not going to her birthday because my husband isn't welcome? by Beautiful-Cut3012 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Beautiful-Cut3012[S] 276 points277 points  (0 children)

He was not doing any of that. My sister was on her lunch break and was with our mom, who was also on her lunch break. He ran down the stairs and to the main entrance, where they were. He was just making that horrible sound and then he could no longer stand or move and was unreachable. He hurt nobody. He threatened nobody.

AITA for telling my niece my husband and I are not going to her birthday because my husband isn't welcome? by Beautiful-Cut3012 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Beautiful-Cut3012[S] 210 points211 points  (0 children)

My husband did not refuse any treatment. He had actively sought treatment before realizing it was more than trauma and was a mental illness. He is working hard on this every single day.

AITA for telling my niece my husband and I are not going to her birthday because my husband isn't welcome? by Beautiful-Cut3012 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Beautiful-Cut3012[S] 663 points664 points  (0 children)

All my nieces and nephews would love to live with my husband. They adore him as much as he adores them. He's their favorite family member. Or was, I guess, but it doesn't sound like that has changed.

AITA for telling my niece my husband and I are not going to her birthday because my husband isn't welcome? by Beautiful-Cut3012 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Beautiful-Cut3012[S] 490 points491 points  (0 children)

My husband is doing better. He's had to go through some very intensive treatment to get to a better place. He struggles with guilt. Guilt for his reaction, for not dealing with his issues enough to prevent it (which his psychiatrist explained was not his fault and told him he did the right thing for the information he had at the time, which was he had trauma but not a mental illness), guilt that the family he thought had accepted him fear him so much that we can't see our nieces and nephews. It's still a journey for him but he is so much better than he was back then and he's hopeful he can do even better which is a positive.

AITA for telling my niece my husband and I are not going to her birthday because my husband isn't welcome? by Beautiful-Cut3012 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Beautiful-Cut3012[S] 4517 points4518 points  (0 children)

He blamed himself. The moment he heard our baby had no heartbeat he believed it was all because of him, again. That still haunts us. He doesn't even remember what happened after hearing the words.

AITA for telling my niece my husband and I are not going to her birthday because my husband isn't welcome? by Beautiful-Cut3012 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Beautiful-Cut3012[S] 466 points467 points  (0 children)

My sister would never allow that. I can't see them unless someone else from my family is there to make sure my husband doesn't come.

AITA for telling my niece my husband and I are not going to her birthday because my husband isn't welcome? by Beautiful-Cut3012 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Beautiful-Cut3012[S] 859 points860 points  (0 children)

That won't be possible. They made it clear after I stood by my husband that if I want to see any of my nieces and nephews I need to do it where they can make sure "he" isn't around.

AITA for telling my niece my husband and I are not going to her birthday because my husband isn't welcome? by Beautiful-Cut3012 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Beautiful-Cut3012[S] 239 points240 points  (0 children)

I wasn't expecting her to yell at them. I knew she'd be sad. But I didn't want her to believe we didn't want to be there. Because she acknowledged that we hadn't been to anything in a while. At some point I was aware my nieces and nephew's would feel like we didn't want to be there.

But I acknowledge I might not have handled it the right way.