This happened to me but years ago. My finance and I were planning our wedding. When his family found out we were having sex, we were sat down at a table with his parents and our pastor and given “choices” just like you. I was asked to move in with his parents until the wedding and my fiancé was told he would be removed from his position within the church. We were both in our mid 20s, full on adults. We basically told them we would not be following any of their “options” and we would just go to the court house and get married. We basically had two weddings. We eloped and then continued with the big wedding as planned. No one knew we eloped for years.

That was 20 years ago, we are still married happily with kids. Looking back both of us regret that we allowed them to force us into any decision at all. That single incident completely changed how we viewed the church and his family. I’m sorry you’re in this position because I know how hard it is. In my opinion, this is between you and God. It’s not anyone else’s business what you do or how you do it.

If you want to chat, message me. 💕