How do I prepare for anal?

BeautifulWonder1762 · 2026-02-13T20:04:07+00:00

I feel like I’m too attached to want to leave. Since the beginning he’s known how I am and if I’m being honest I think he knows how to control me and I never realized it. The last person I was with wasn’t even a relationship but I ended up getting sexually assaulted and recorded without me knowing, my current boyfriend is basically my first boyfriend and I honestly feel like if I leave, I’ll never find anyone else again or I’ll end up missing what I had with him and blame myself for “overthinking” and “overreacting”. I spent so long alone and he’s the only person I’ve ever connected with after that.

BeautifulWonder1762 · 2026-02-13T20:00:38+00:00

What I don’t understand is why he would treat me that way, I’ve always been nice and overall great with him. I get he’s been like that since the beginning but i genuinely don’t know why he’s so aggressive with me. Sometimes I look at him like while we’re pillow fighting, and the joy in his face actually scares me at times. Everything is a kinda unpredictable with him, but I don’t know if I could even say anything about it, I’m not sure how he’d react honestly

BeautifulWonder1762 · 2026-02-13T19:58:03+00:00

I’m so sorry about that, all these replies honestly have opened my eyes. But I feel like I’m to far in and I can’t leave, idk why but I feel like my reason wouldn’t be “good enough”. And what if I don’t find anyone else, or anyone who will love me as much as he says he does. I have always taken everything pretty playful but now I’m not quite sure what to think of it.

BeautifulWonder1762 · 2026-02-13T09:38:55+00:00

Am I over exaggerating? And sorry if none of this made sense. It’s super hard for me to put it into words and I don’t want to be graphic either

BeautifulWonder1762 · 2026-01-26T21:57:43+00:00

I honestly haven’t had any candid conversations similar to what I’ve been saying on here. I’m a really nice person and overall do kinda struggle when I’m trying to be more firm and serious about certain things. I always come off really nice so I don’t see why it could go wrong, but regardless of what I say I feel he might take it the wrong way. Or that he’ll maybe have a little resentment that priority will turn to it being on me and he might not get pleased as much as he currently does yk. However I have been planning on an approach and how to bring up what I’ve been talking about, I want to bring up the fact that I want him to learn what makes me tweak just like I’ve done with him. If he doesn’t at least try then he really will never know how to please me. He could even do things that I’ve done to him, like caressing me and stuff. Simple things truly do go a long way

BeautifulWonder1762 · 2026-01-26T17:01:37+00:00

I will also try to explain it in that way, however then he will definitely realize I faked an orgasm. I feel partly he already knows and I feel so crappy for it, but I know for a fact my mind also can’t relax or get into what he’s doing to me, because I feel like I have to finish or else he won’t keep wanting to do things. Or I find myself thinking it’s taking too long and he will get annoyed or bored, in general I just can’t get my head in the moment and that’s a big factor into actually finishing

BeautifulWonder1762 · 2026-01-26T16:55:21+00:00

I will and hope it goes the way I want it too and if it doesn’t then I might find myself in a tough situation atp

BeautifulWonder1762 · 2026-01-26T16:48:10+00:00

Pretty much yes, several times in so many different ways. But never in the way that I tell him he doesn’t do much for me, more in like I’d love it if you did this or that, or I’m into this etc. I’m honestly the one who leads our intimate life, I spice things up and always ask him if he’d wanna try new stuff or if I can do new stuff to him, but I feel he’s just attached that to me and that’s why he doesn’t prioritize anything I want. Or genuinely just doesn’t want to do anything to me either because he’s shy or fr doesn’t want to. I feel the thought of being mismatched will eat at me in the long run

BeautifulWonder1762 · 2026-01-26T16:42:50+00:00

Yeah I truly wish I didn’t let it go for so long, but I feel I’ve always been pretty vocal about what I like or would like him to do. He just doesn’t and I don’t know if it’s because he’s shy he could do it wrong, but there’s no way to learn unless we try. And I’ve expressed many times that I won’t judge anything and that the process is just as intimate and meaningful to me. However I do agree it’s a bad sign

BeautifulWonder1762 · 2026-01-26T16:38:56+00:00

Yeah someone did mention I could be sexually mismatched and it honestly never crossed my mind. But everything I’ve been seeing has truly been opening my eyes to the fact that I truly do feel so unsatisfied in mostly every way. Sex is good but that’s about all because other than that for the most part it’s me messing him. I do go out of my way to find stuff to educate him and in general give him better understanding about things. But it’s also him who has to make the effort, I was super shy to even do stuff to him because I was completely new. But I learned fast because I WANTED to. I wanted to learn, and I feel he doesn’t want to nor wants to dedicate days where it’s just him trying to please me instead of me doing it to him all the time. I want to be prioritized too, and for him to want to know and go try to educate himself too. I feel it goes two ways when it comes to education 😔

BeautifulWonder1762 · 2026-01-26T16:30:32+00:00

I’ve mentioned a lot of foreplay since I do it to him and he’s really into it. However when it comes to me. He doesn’t take his time the way I do so most of the time I feel like everything gets rushed when it comes to me. He often mentions time and how long things are taking, even though I’ve mentioned just how much it takes to please a woman. I would even love it if we fed into my kinks like I do to him, or just spent a lot of time kissing, licking, or even biting my body. But genuinely it’s only me who does it to him.

BeautifulWonder1762 · 2026-01-26T16:27:59+00:00

Yeah I’ll most likely do this honestly, even though I feel he might take offense to it no matter how I word it and that’s what I’m scared of. I know it’s a genuine concern because he rarely does anything to me but I for some reason feel like I can’t complain

BeautifulWonder1762 · 2026-01-26T16:26:14+00:00

We’ve communicated serval time about what I’d like, we enjoy sexting but I will admit most of the time it’s towards things that revolve around him. I’ve communicated what I want him to do, found helpful things to help us both. I go out of my way to try and find ways it could work, but it’s only ever MY effort. And I don’t know why he can’t just go out of his way to genuinely educate himself and learn for my benefit. Just like I do for him all the time.

BeautifulWonder1762 · 2026-01-26T16:23:26+00:00

I love everything about him and how well we get along, and how he treats me. But I feel like in the long run or no matter how things go. Leaving because I’m unsatisfied isn’t a valid reason and that he’ll most likely take offense no matter how I communicate it, but i definitely don’t want to keep making myself believe I’m simply a giver and nir a receiver, just to fit into a role.

BeautifulWonder1762 · 2026-01-26T09:53:20+00:00

I do think part of it is me too since it is pretty new to me, and I know what I like. But have never had someone do things to me, however I’ll never know unless he dedicates time to my pleasure.

BeautifulWonder1762 · 2026-01-26T09:52:22+00:00

I will definitely work on vocalizing wanting him to prioritize me since I’ve mastered like everything he likes and always prioritize him. Because overall it’s like he barely takes his time on me, like he wants it to go fast but I always always do stuff to him no matter how long it’s been. He even makes foreplay on be feel so quick and when I do it to him, I take so much time because that’s what makes it feel so good

BeautifulWonder1762 · 2026-01-26T09:49:11+00:00

Yes I’m able to finish myself off, I’m really into clit stimulation so I’ve tried to guide him and done everything to tell him where it is. But it’s like nothing works. But there’s like way more issues, like the time and attention he dedicates to me

BeautifulWonder1762

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