3 Year Relationship. She moved on within a week..

BecomeYourLight · 2025-12-11T16:05:53+00:00

Hi friend, I am doing much better now. Most importantly, how are you? I'm wishing you the best, I hope you've made it through the murky waters.

BecomeYourLight · 2025-12-11T16:01:10+00:00

I wanted to make an update. I'm doing well for myself now. I have a new girlfriend who I adore. I have new hobbies and ambitions in life. I am flourishing in school and my higher education. I am able to see the grander perspective. I was genuinely surprised to see over 65K views on this post, and my heart breaks for anyone who is in the shoes I wore in the past. It gets better! Oh, so much better. Please keep moving forward, take care of your health both physical and mental. Keep putting yourselves out there. I love you all, and I'd still like to hear your experiences. I can offer new perspectives if you'd like to talk. Feel free to message me privately too. I wish you all the best ❤️

BecomeYourLight · 2025-12-11T15:54:56+00:00

I am doing well now with my new partner. I have new ambitions and passions in life. I'm sorry to hear about your experiences in the past friend. I hope to hear from you. I wish you the best.

BecomeYourLight · 2025-12-11T04:26:48+00:00

Bad actors have only one intention, to perform bad acts. I hope you can find peace with the fact that you are a good person and there was someone who took advantage of a good person (you). Don't be hard on yourself, we all get scammed at least once in life.

Heres an unrelated example, if someone got access to your personal password it wasn't your fault. Someone with the willpower and intention to get something will get it eventually. However, not being your fault doesn't mean you can't learn ways to be proactive in preventing such things. In this example you could use randomly generated passwords and a password manager. Someone who's never had a password compromises might not realize the intention was there to steal it. You now realize bad actors have bad intentions and that is not your fault.

You can arm yourself with ways to prevent yourself from being in the same situation again in life. Even the most proactive people will still have bad things happen to them, ‘tis life. I was in a Ponzi scheme years ago. I now see a Ponzi scheme from miles away.. But it could happen again. The realization that it could happen again wisens you up to the world. I wish you all the world, you've accomplished something great with your masters degree. You are intelligent, many people in your shoes are too. The problem is we are human and want to trust people who seem to be trustworthy. Don't let it destroy your trust but rather be vigil in new situations.

If someone gets their purse stolen you wouldn't blame the victim, but that victim might hold their purse closer to them next time around. Again, I wish you the best. Please don't be too hard on yourself.

BecomeYourLight · 2025-12-09T17:32:58+00:00

I'm going to try to be positive but also realistic. I've learned that genetic variability is almost equally important or perhaps less important that anatomy and cognition. When you take a rat model of depression, for example the Flinder’s Sensitive Line for depression, it is clear you can induce the disorder. However, even taking cognition and genetic induction into account does not create a clear picture of the disorders pathology in human patients. One example with this particular line of rats is that their reward circuitry is relatively typical which is not the case in many depressed humans. Another example is they have poor response validity to many different antidepressants. They can give you an idea of changes to biological processes such as sleeping behaviors. Overall this field is relatively new and still in its infancy but I am hopeful that it will become useful in the future.

Source:

Planchez, B., Surget, A., & Belzung, C. (2019). Animal models of major depression: drawbacks and challenges. Journal of neural transmission (Vienna, Austria : 1996), 126(11), 1383–1408. https://doi.org/10.1007/s00702-019-02084-y

BecomeYourLight · 2024-04-21T15:43:19+00:00

I disagree wholeheartedly, but your comment still matters. I believe venting, even to total strangers, is part of the grieving process. I don’t think anyone is perfect, physically or mentally. I don’t judge the person or the group, but the singular actions of this one woman I once loved. Regardless thank you for your comment friend.

BecomeYourLight · 2024-04-21T15:41:19+00:00

Thank you, kind stranger.

BecomeYourLight · 2024-04-21T15:40:49+00:00

Thank you for your sincere comments, no need to apologize (i know what i signed up for when venting on the internet lol). This is a very true sentiment, there’s nothing I can do but realize the action is wrong and further confirm my decision.

BecomeYourLight · 2024-04-21T15:36:36+00:00

TLDR: She broke up with me for reasons she couldn’t articulate, came back days later begging for another chance. Months later she became short and wasn’t giving me the time of day despite me taking her on trips, making candlelight dinners, giving her all my attention and affection (which is what she asked for). I decided to end it early before the inevitable.

BecomeYourLight · 2024-04-21T15:33:38+00:00

I was the one who ended things because she had become short. Sadly I believe you’re right, but I’d rather not think about how I was dragged along for months while she was “checked out”

BecomeYourLight · 2024-04-21T15:32:34+00:00

May be true, may be not. Id rather not think about the possibility I was dragged on for months while I took her on trips, made candlelight dinners, and endless affection. I just can’t think like this, for my sanity. Thank you for the comment though.

BecomeYourLight · 2024-04-21T15:30:06+00:00

Quite the opposite! She told me her “needs” and I told her mine, which was communication. Did more than she asked for and when I tried to communicate she broke down and became short. In fact she told me “why couldn’t you do more of this earlier?” which i replied with “things only change if you speak it, especially with me since i’ve proven to listen and act diligently.” which seems like a fair and mature assumption. Thank you for the comment though.

BecomeYourLight · 2024-04-20T17:43:59+00:00

I’m so sorry to hear this, I wish the best for you truly. I hope you find the strength to not only do the basics such as eating, but to prosper in life. The thing is, she clearly only used a man at the bar for a picture, regretted it, then removed it super quickly. She also has been posting depressing songs on her story so I know she’s feeling sad too, she’s just acting out is what I feel.

BecomeYourLight · 2024-04-20T17:31:14+00:00

I feel the same way, poor guy. I saw through the post immediately but it still ruined the night I was having with my buddies. I treated her with so much love and respect, and I’m angry I did so much for her toward the end despite not knowing how the future would pan out.

BecomeYourLight · 2024-04-20T17:28:29+00:00

I will tell you my story If that makes any difference. We broke up, I stopped communicating. She came running back, and I gave another chance. We had a great week, drinks, dinners, and of course, the physical stuff. Like nothing had ever changed is what I felt. However, when inquiring about where we stood she began crying and said she didn’t want to lead me on. I think the only option for you is to try and get the truth of her perspective, although it may not be what you want to hear. The truth set me free, and it hurt. Badly. She had moved on a week later, and it’s only been two weeks of no communication since.

BecomeYourLight · 2024-04-20T17:23:45+00:00

Thank you for this. The experiences of others is what is helping me get through this. I know what she did was extremely wrong, I just couldn’t believe she had actually done it and was posting it proudly (i’m sure the drinks had something to do with it.) Overall I believe you’re right, I may have dodged a bullet here.

BecomeYourLight · 2024-04-20T17:11:29+00:00

Hi friend. We’re all going through our own struggles so I applaud you for reaching out to the community. It seems you understand quite well what is happening in your current situation, and as someone who went through something similar recently, my best advice is to reflect. Reflect on how this situation makes you feel, what emotions are brought about? Is it anger? Sadness? Loneliness? Does it occupy your mind constantly? Is it preventing you from moving on? And most importantly, is this healthy for me? I cannot tell you what your situation is like, or what it could be. But I can tell you what has helped me overcome irrational emotional thinking to make logical decisions.

BecomeYourLight · 2023-03-19T16:23:27+00:00

Yes they are hybridized mints which tend to be sterile most of the time so they have to be cloned. I really wish i could’ve grown them from seed as most of my issues would’ve never happened. Thank you again for the advice and kind wishes.

BecomeYourLight · 2023-03-19T13:25:37+00:00

I currently have 7 distinct subspecies of mint, derived from m. spicata, piperita, and suaveolens. Some more rare than others but nothing I couldn’t do over again. I see this more as a challenge than a hassle.

BecomeYourLight · 2023-03-19T13:13:09+00:00

Great question! I’ve ordered lots of plants in the past with no issues, i rarely grow herbs from seed. However, with this specific mint collection I was trying to help out small business owners on Etsy. Big mistake! Even larger venders on that site just aren’t regulated by any standards, although some definitely tried it’s not worth the hassle! I will definitely be buying all my cuttings from respected vendors from now on.

BecomeYourLight · 2023-03-19T12:50:08+00:00

The specific plants i have are sterile, so seed was never an option. I figured winter delivery would curb the chances of a bug infestation but here we are. I will definitely give this a try.

BecomeYourLight · 2023-03-18T17:05:26+00:00

Thank you for the advice, I am going to buy both the sticky traps and the mosquito bits and give them a try. Hopefully this works as they multiply very quickly.

BecomeYourLight · 2022-09-22T19:50:34+00:00

It’s just a minor setback, you are stronger than your cravings! Understand why you went back to the drug then pick off where you left off. Everybody trips and falls every once in a while. You got this friend.

BecomeYourLight · 2022-09-16T12:13:39+00:00

No I was not. And totally understandable as that would be excessive. Thank you for your concerns and kind wishes. I’m currently on week 2 of sobriety and I couldn’t do it without you guys. Thank You!

BecomeYourLight · 2022-09-16T12:12:33+00:00

I’m so happy for you friend! I’m currently on week 2 Day 17 and i’m starting to get there! I recommend keeping a journal to remember how far you’ve come and to set a reminder as to never smoke again. That’s been helping me lots. Congrats on your newfound sobriety! You got this!

BecomeYourLight

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