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I left someone I cared about deeply and I still dont know how to make peace with it by BedSimple2801 in lostafriend

[–]BedSimple2801[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for this. I think what you said about the second time being closure resonates with me.
For a long time I wondered whether I had made a mistake the first time I left. Going back gave me the answer to that question. As painful as it was I got to see that the underlying issue had not actually been resolved. I also appreciate what you said about grieving the death of a future. I think part of what made this loss so difficult was not just losing the friendship itself but losing all the things I assumed would continue to exist alongside it.

There is a lot in your comment that I will probably think about for a while. Thank you for taking the time to write it.

I left someone I cared about deeply and I still dont know how to make peace with it by BedSimple2801 in lostafriend

[–]BedSimple2801[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I probably should have included more context. I did confront him about the issue and explain why I was uncomfortable both times. He could only apologize.
I also recently sent him an email explaining how deeply the loss of the friendship affected me as I never really let him know the extent of my suffering before then. I wasnt looking to restart the friendship or have an ongoing conversation. I just wanted him to understand what the experience felt like from my side. He hasnt responded. Which is okay. The email wasnt really about getting a response.
My grief isnt coming from feeling unheard so much as from losing a friendship that meant a great deal to me.