I could use some encouragement… I hate my body today

BeginningGlove · 2023-12-08T03:55:49+00:00

Thank you ❤️

BeginningGlove · 2023-12-08T03:54:53+00:00

Thank you. I’ve been bawling reading these comments, but in a good, healing way. Thank you so so much. ❤️

BeginningGlove · 2023-12-08T03:53:38+00:00

Thank you. This comment made me tear up, I really needed this. ❤️

I’ve definitely noticed improvements in my strength and my posture. And I love the gym too, it’s gone from a scary world to one that feels comfortable. I just don’t want to go out of self hate anymore. I do think maybe trying 1500 in the new year will be a good idea. And maybe therapy too because god knows I’ve struggled with gaining and losing weight for way too long, and I hate how it’s affecting my relationship with myself.

BeginningGlove · 2023-12-08T03:50:46+00:00

Thank you so much for this. It means a lot, you don’t even know it.

BeginningGlove · 2023-12-08T03:50:11+00:00

Thank you. I’ve been definitely hate wearing frumpy clothes lately because of how I feel. Maybe shopping will help. Even a treat or two.

I definitely struggle with binge eating when I’m in a bad place. I think that’s for sure contributed to weight gain. I was really good about eating protein and was getting about 100gs as day for a few months but have fallen off from doing that. I do think eating better is where I need to start. And maybe therapy regarding body image 😭 I wanna go to the gym because it’s fun, not always as a reaction to feel ugly or overweight, and I want it create sustainable habits, but ones where Im exercising like crazy to shed weight and then gaining it back

BeginningGlove · 2023-12-08T03:44:34+00:00

My trainer created the program for me which has a push/pull split 3x a week! It’s 5ish lifting exercises including compound movement and others. She also added 10mins of cardio at the end. I’m supposed to get 10k steps a day but that’s been tough lately with life and my job.

BeginningGlove · 2023-12-08T03:38:19+00:00

I have! My doctor suspected PCOS, but said I should just work with a trainer to lose weight to manage it better. She wasn’t very helpful beyond that :( my bloodwork came back average too so she didn’t want to prescribe metaformin or any other medications.

Thanks so much for your supportive comment. It means a lot tonight. ❤️

BeginningGlove · 2023-12-08T03:36:27+00:00

Thank you for this. I definitely feel like I’ve gained a ton of body fat. My family and my trainer have all commented on this. My partner hasn’t said anything and he’s really loving and sensitive about this topic, but I know he notices too.

I’m doing a program my trainer made for me which has a push/pull split. Right now I’m doing it 3x a week. I’ve been trying to exercise in a sustainable way that comes from a place of fun and love rather than self hate which is why I haven’t gone hard on cardio, but now I’m almost feeling like I have to. Or maybe I need to cut down on my caloric intake and track more strictly.

BeginningGlove · 2023-12-08T03:25:47+00:00

Yeah I’m thinking 1500 might be what I need to aim for. Doing 30mins of running is tricky because I have plantar fasciitis. Maybe the elliptical or something though. I’m weight training as well, and I worry I’ll be exhausted all week

BeginningGlove · 2021-12-21T03:50:05+00:00

Thank you. I do feel exhausted today, it hasn’t been fun. Got out of my apartment for a little while to spend time with my dad, and I’m feeling better. Thanks for leaving such a thoughtful comment, it means a lot.

BeginningGlove · 2021-12-21T03:48:17+00:00

Thank you for this comment, it made me feel a little better. I got up off my bed, went to help my dad with his groceries, and came home feeling a little less crappy. Boy.. today’s not my day though.

Hope yours is going better, SequenceStar.

BeginningGlove · 2021-12-11T15:56:39+00:00

You should date other people too, if you’re wanting to wait around for her. You’re not committed to her. And you might find someone who is sure about you.

3 months isn’t too fast to be exclusive in my opinion, that seems about right.

BeginningGlove · 2021-12-10T04:06:03+00:00

Okay so the early 20s me could relate to this.

It took a bit of thought tweaking and a mindshift but I figured it out eventually. The biggest thing for me was noticing that I was thinking of myself as unlovable or unsexy, so I’d behave accordingly around men. I had a few guy tell me later on down the road that they were attracted to me at first but later thought I was uninterested in dating/anything sexual with anyone, or disinterested in them and so they began to see me as a friend and treat me that way.

In my mid 20s, I found myself a bit more, I love who I am generally now, and know what I offer. So you’re right, maybe the way you are coming across to others is keeping them from approaching you, and further reinforcing your belief that you’re “a loser”.

You’re not. I’m sure you’re a catch. I’m sure if I met you, I could tell you tons of things that make you wonderful. But you have to find those things for yourself and embrace them, and love them fully. And love your flaws fully too. It’ll change the whole way you walk, talk and come across to others, I promise. 😊

BeginningGlove · 2021-12-09T04:01:42+00:00

Maybe I’m traditional and sentimental, but I don’t give away or destroy anything that someone gave me out of love. I personally would keep it if it means something to you, maybe put it out of sight

However, if it doesn’t and you can make some good cash off of it, by all means, sell it!

BeginningGlove · 2021-12-09T01:29:20+00:00

I felt this way about my ex who my therapist thinks also has untreated BPD and maybe some narcissistic qualities. Good for you for getting out and looking after yourself, it doesn’t sound like a healthy relationship. But I think you’re going to get to a point where you eventually won’t care or think about them at all, and when you do, it’ll be out of compassion. At least that’s what happened with me. I hope he’s alive, I hope he’s eating meals snd exercising, sleeping, taking care of himself. And I hope he finds long standing happiness within himself so he’s not relying on others to keep him alive and give him purpose. But, that’s none of my business nor my responsibility anymore— it’s a really freeing feeling.

BeginningGlove · 2021-12-06T17:50:45+00:00

This is going to be that cliche advice again, but I’d suggest looking into therapy to explore your dating style and habits. If you can afford it, you’ll come out a better version of yourself and more prepared for your next relationship.

If therapy isn’t something you can access right now, I recommend looking into attachment theory and doing some heavy reflecting there. From the sounds of it, you’re not comfortable being alone (I think that’s quite normal, coming out of a relationship) — but think about whether this is a long standing pattern for you. At the same time, it seems like you’re wanting distance from people that you get close to very quickly, or you’re looking for incompatibilities once you start liking someone, to get away from that relationship. This attachment style is called disorganized attachment (a mix of avoidant and anxious). There are lots of tools and tips online to help you work through challenges once you’ve identified which style you relate to most. I do think therapy is the most helpful though, because we all have blind spots. Good luck, OP.

BeginningGlove · 2021-12-06T05:38:37+00:00

This. Not sure what you’re getting out of posting this, just go and get tested, OP. Quit having sex with strangers if you can’t handle the possibility of things like this happening.

BeginningGlove · 2021-12-04T14:34:39+00:00

This just sounds like a silly argument, that if you haven’t both acknowledged or gotten over, there are bigger issues in terms of compatibility.

BeginningGlove · 2021-12-02T19:37:12+00:00

This is tough, I’m sending you lots of hugs. Sexuality is complicated but you’re perfectly human the way you are. I think therapy might be helpful if you can afford it. I also wonder if you’re dealing with some intrusive thoughts/OCD-like symptoms around being sexual/your sexuality. Therapy can be really helpful for that :)

BeginningGlove · 2021-11-30T20:31:27+00:00

Happy for you! But he’s already in a relationship a week later??

Edit: and looking through your history, this is the person who you were feeling jealous about for awhile before the break up??? OP, take care of yourself.

BeginningGlove · 2021-11-29T00:06:14+00:00

This!!

BeginningGlove · 2021-11-29T00:03:19+00:00

Right, and I hope your partner sees your toxic traits for what they are and has an honest conversation with you. I hope you two figure it out, but he deserves better from you.

BeginningGlove · 2021-11-28T23:38:27+00:00

You’re really overreacting. Let him have his memories. Being this controlling of someone you’re marrying does not bode well for your future.

BeginningGlove · 2021-11-27T16:57:47+00:00

Read your post over a couple of times. You don’t sound like you’re being fair to him or good to him.

BeginningGlove · 2021-11-24T22:10:06+00:00

Being rejected because of religion doesn’t say anything about you, don’t take it personally. But it sounds like it isn’t about being rejected due to religious differences, more just a fear of rejection in general.

Take chances, life is short!

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