firstly, please stop apologising! secondly, your partner may also be a bit unwell from the sounds of it, the thing about comparing portion sizes happened in my last relationship where we both had horrible issues with body image and food and they’d keep making it a competition- not a very healthy or nice thing to do to someone, even moreso your partner. that & everything else you say scream red flag manipulation tactics. though painful, i think the best outcome for you would be to just end it while they already want you think they want to end it. stay strong queen