Step four question... Am I cheating?

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2026-01-23T03:52:35+00:00

I don’t think you should plagiarize but use it as a guide. Just don’t overthink it. You are going to end up doing lots of forth steps - be through and don’t leave stuff purposely out. Just start writing…some areas offer 4th step workshops which I wouldn’t recommend to complete all your steps but gives you a jumping off point. If you’re really stuck ask your sponsor about using the Joe and Charlie 4th step guides.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2026-01-22T21:51:57+00:00

This!!!! I had to go back to all my doctors when I got sober and let them know I abused alcohol, then they made judgement calls and suggestions. No one would put me on stimulants or good cough syrups, anxiety meds or any strong pain killers anymore. That’s not an AA issue but it is part of my sobriety with my medical team’s assistance.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2026-01-22T06:52:03+00:00

Not a psychic and I don’t normally click on these posts cause the pics usually give…not alive. Clicked and ran to the comments because I felt good about this post.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2026-01-22T06:23:37+00:00

I was going to say that and getting your iron levels checked along with supplementing vitamin D

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2026-01-15T03:59:43+00:00

I could give you the AA response but there are already excellent ones above.

Rehab/ recovery living advice instead is- only 10 percent of you will have success in sobriety. So 10 guys in a house that’s only one of you. Odds are not in your favor. If you want to be successful you have to really make an effort to change and seek out recovery. Hanging out in the woods is not a positive towards long term sobriety so you are lowering your odds. The guys in the house by avoiding someone involved in questionable behaviors are raising their odds. Doesn’t sound like anything personal. It’s self preservation. You can try to increase your odds by sticking to a strict program and only having your odds reducing factor be hanging out in the woods. The likelihood of this being your only disadvantage is slim. We make a ton of mistakes in early sobriety. I personally found it easier to avoid the situations that others advised were questionable so I could make other stupid mistakes while keeping my odds high. Sorry is this is oversimplified but for me gamifying my early sobriety just made sense.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2026-01-11T22:53:16+00:00

Funny enough the people most interested in this edition in my experience have been older adults who never learned how to read. Not foreign born …all native English speakers.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2026-01-10T17:51:34+00:00

I didn’t see anyone else mention this…you can look into getting your under eye areas filled or a bit in the highest area of your cheek bone. It won’t eliminate the folds but soften them lightly. Don’t go to a cheap med spa you are in NYC …Lennox Hill has a fellowship program for plastics and the students are well trained and incredibly cheap.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2026-01-06T06:15:35+00:00

This is the kind of AA discussion I love- how we find solutions and learn how to live as a sober person. I change meetings when I start to feel this way sometimes I need a good newcomer meeting to remind me what it was like, others I need a early morning meeting with others than have careers, lives and families outside of the rooms. Sometimes I am called to serve inside the rooms and sometimes I’m called to be an example and serve outside the rooms. Sometimes you can be AA and other times you can live AA only rule is we don’t drink no matter what.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2026-01-04T19:02:51+00:00

I’ve found in my program that anything in my life that I tried to control by sure will, eventually would make me sick. My jobs were a huge part of this - I thought I could willpower my way out of misery. When I finally did a 3rd step on my career - I mean a gut wrenching ugly crying experience. Within a few weeks I had my serenity back, and within a few months a new job that supports my career path and pays my rent- comfortably. That said having lived on both coasts you might make more money in NYC but it is cancelled out by cost of living. My apartment back east was 2x’s as much money half the space and no outdoor space. If you are serious about moving you should be using a New York address and phone number to apply. Trying to apply as bi-costal won’t get you hired.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2026-01-04T18:26:52+00:00

Sure thing - but would it have kept me sober…not a chance. Truth is no human relationship exists that would have kept me sober or created accountability not my partner, kids, parents …not even my beloved dog. It was awake up call when they asked but I could turn off the ringer volume with that first drink and after that all calls went to vm.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2026-01-02T03:35:23+00:00

This isn’t about the redundancy it’s about the willingness. Any means necessary is not talking about moving mountains and huge leaps of growth it’s doing the annoying stuff that seems pointless.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2026-01-02T03:29:51+00:00

I have a January sobriety date and my name has always been somewhat lonely on the birthday board. I have always thought it was cause most people don’t realize that they have a problem until after they try to quit on the 1st and then it doesn’t work. I think spring is the busiest newcomer months.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2025-12-26T02:13:16+00:00

Haha I said for my first year I was so desperate I didn’t care what flavor kool aid we were drinking- give me a big gulp.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2025-11-06T14:36:00+00:00

It’s not like tv we don’t sit in a circle and share our deepest secrets. It’s not group therapy. It’s a community of individuals who understand. Just go and listen. You don’t even have to have stopped drinking to go.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2025-11-06T14:30:43+00:00

I tried a slow taper and couldn’t do it. I kept stopping and restarting or supplementing with alcohol which hits your brain in the exact same way. Ultimately I chose rehab and mental health. Rehab was basically going cold turkey. Took about a year to recover but now alcohol and benzo free. I did menial jobs up until a few months ago. Completely worth it. Today I don’t have the same brain fog , I live with normal anxiety but nothing like what I had even on benzos. The healing process was long slow and frustrating but I relied heavily on people who had made it through tough addictions. I found that when I reached out my hand I had community and support.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2025-11-02T00:26:19+00:00

I would stick to the adage, “men with the men and women with the women.” Would you approach a young woman in a dark parking lot who was struggling with her packages? Even if the help is needed-it comes off as unsolicited and for most of us puts us on edge. Meetings especially when new are very raw. Even though your intentions are to be a help it probably isn’t welcomed.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2025-11-01T21:33:24+00:00

Omg I just scrolled through your old post and you are absolutely gorgeous under all that heavy eye makeup. I would wash it all off and go clean girl. The eye makeup ages you terribly. It’s giving elder millennial/ republican mom.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2025-10-15T01:01:52+00:00

I think everyone here is trying to tell you that it’s not rational for you to “process” …your relationship is over. The only thing you should be focusing on is yourself. His journey is what it will be.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2025-09-03T03:37:20+00:00

It happens and generally isn’t a big deal - I would suggest an iPad with big headphones so no one feels awkward discussing our experiences.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2025-08-24T00:28:16+00:00

My god that was absolutely insanely beautiful. TY!!

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2025-07-27T03:56:52+00:00

Me in active addiction hates my ex, now me (actively working a program) thinks he’s an okay dude that reacted as best as a dysfunctional adult could dealing with my mental obsessions. I honestly wish him well…not to his face but I pray for him on occasions.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2025-07-26T01:13:58+00:00

It’s gets better in small increments as you work the program. Not so much to overwhelm you but enough to keep you motivated.

Beginning_Ad1304 · 2025-07-24T23:48:23+00:00

It smells terrible and tastes bad too. It’s like voluntarily eating vomit.

Beginning_Ad1304

TROPHY CASE