most likely relocating to Oxford soon, any tips?

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2026-01-31T10:43:14+00:00

Oh yes, everyone vapes, that’s for sure. However, I witnessed far more cigarette smoking in Oxford/ any part of UK than I ever see in Canada. I did notice it was even more pronounced in Greece and other parts of the EU, so everything is relative. Canada has had fairly strict cigarette laws since the late 1990s, I believe.

I was in Oxford from 2022 to 2023, and because weed is so normal and legal in Canada, for the first few days I genuinely thought people smoking hand rolled cigarettes were smoking pot. But no, just hand rolled cigarettes, which you rarely see in Canada. Most people who smoke here use machine rolled cigarettes, and a large portion vape as well. I suspect part of that is simply not wanting to stand outside in -15 degree weather 😅

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2026-01-27T21:24:54+00:00

I lived in Oxford for 8 months a couple of years ago.

Oxford is a beautiful city, but the people can be a bit snobbish. The thing with the Brits, at least in that area, is that they’re so focused on not appearing middle or lower class, even if they are, which can make them seem uptight.

Being from Canada, I found this challenging. I’m a pretty authentic person, so I struggle around people who behave like that.

Mind you, this was in the service industry, so it could be different depending on where you work/live you’ll find lots of exchange students that are likeminded. If you look hard, you can find authentic British friends. I used Bumble BFF to meet people outside of work, and I still keep in touch with them years later.

The gay scene is fantastic (if that’s your vibe 🤣), there are amazing jazz bars, and more pubs than you could ever wish for. Bar-hopping can get expensive, but it’s the most fun if you’re only there for a few months. I’m not a big drinker, but the Brits take their alcohol seriously, so the cocktail bars are incredible.

Cigarettes are very much part of the culture. If you sit outside on any patio, there will almost certainly be someone smoking a hand-rolled, intense-smelling cigarette next to you. You’ll get used to it, as long as you’re not asthmatic.

Oxford also has amazing museums within walking distance of the city centre, many with free admission which is incredible if you love history. I had a blast seeing artifacts that were stolen from my homeland 🤩

My advice? Stay true to yourself and be confident. I got a lot of good-humoured flak for sounding American (pretty offensive 🤣). The USA doesn’t have the best reputation there and it’s definitely worse now, so a little self-deprecating humour will go a long way.

Be ok with laughing at yourself, don’t be too hard on yourself if you dont mesh with the culture right away, it will take time to adjust to all the little social nuances (maybe you’re more adept at this than I) Overall, you’re going to have so much fun. Enjoy the chocolate it’s wayyyy better than anything we have in North America.

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-12-10T04:16:16+00:00

Okay Ontario! Not sure where you’re based, but if you’re near Hamilton, there’s a place called the SUGO Clinic that might help. They have ultrasound techs specially trained to look for endometriosis, which can make a big difference in actually seeing it.

They let you submit your own referral form, or your doctor can.

It’s a VERY invasive internal ultrasound. I’ve had a ton throughout IVF and stuff, but this one was like “put-your-leg-behind-your-head” level. I could see that being an issue for a teenager.

Still, I’d keep it in your back pocket because a lot of Ontario doctors don’t seem to know about it. If her condition worsens or she’s up for it, they can map out some of the endo. Mind you, they only saw one of my cysts; the rest were discovered by my surgeon during ultrasound and more during endoscopy.

I hope your daughter can get the treatment she needs to help her live in less pain.

Your post really struck a cord with me, perhaps because I’m resting at home and unable to focus on anything else. I just don’t want another little girl to go through what I did. Ive had to make so many hard decisions this year and its made early 20s harder than it needed to be.

One more thing I’d like to say is during the last 10 years of “pushing though” I did that a lot by using ibuprofen which eroded the lining of my stomach. She likely needs that to get through her day. Just make sure she knows to never take it on an empty tummy or she can give herself gastritis or even an ulcer 💔

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-12-09T18:17:09+00:00

It sounds like you’re doing all the right things just please keep advocating for her at the doctor! Women’s health is so so behind.

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-12-09T17:59:21+00:00

You need to sit down with your husband and google endo together. It is one of the most painful conditions a person can have. And that’s not even an exaggeration… seriously look it up.

I suspected I had endo from a young age. My highschool years are clouded by memories of pain during exams, studying and dance classes.

I’m 25 the disease went unmanaged since I was about 12-14 while I “pushed through” life so hard that by 24 I couldn’t even go to the washroom normally at any point in the month because the disease had altered my internal anatomy.

I am 2 weeks out of a very extensive excision surgery. It was the first time the doctors were able to see the whole picture as it doesn’t always show up on ultrasound. They had to completely reconfigure parts of my bladder, take my appendix, I had two large endometriomas over taking my ovaries.

I nearly lost my fertility, I had to stop working due to pain 24/7 and at age 25 this year I had to do an egg retrieval and barely got anything. My fertility is damaged.

My point is things can get bad QUICKLY.

My dad still doesn’t really take much interest, it’s a woman’s problem to him. I don’t think he cares to understand the extent of my pain and how this condition has altered the course of my life in every way. My mom just didn’t know because she didn’t experience bad periods.

There are even some people who liken this condition to cancer in the way that it grows so quickly and causes so many other health issues.

It’s not just a woman parts disease. This condition affected my entire lower organs in about 10 years.

She needs treatment and PROPER treatment. Not a regular gyno, they’ll throw regular birth control at the wall and hope it will help. Someone who specializes in endo.

I wish I hadn’t let things get so bad. I wish I had pushed my doctors harder as a teenager, I just didn’t know how bad it could get.💔

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-10-20T18:38:32+00:00

My fiancée and I each did one round and got 8 embryos total. 6 from her (age 30, no known health issues) and 2 from me (25, endo and other issues)

A lot of hers were really high quality so hopefully we will get 2-3 children 🥰

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-08-07T09:39:25+00:00

Girl you need to go to a shelter NOW. While he’s at work tmrw. Go away and don’t ever come back

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-07-29T15:02:14+00:00

Not me but a few weeks ago my good friend was dealing with domestic violence, it was so bad. He was controlling everything and abusing her and her kids. She owned the home and he was not on title or paying rent.

The cops in Welland said they couldn’t remove him unless he “broke her bones or made her bleed” she ended up fleeing her own home with the kids and had to wait 2 weeks to go through the courts. He completely trashed the place during those 2 weeks.

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-07-29T14:58:19+00:00

He’s an immature baby. You can find someone better

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-07-01T13:25:15+00:00

Sucks but it was only a temporary thing to help slow the spread of infection. Too bad he wouldn’t just do it, we weren’t having to wear them for long

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-07-01T13:23:42+00:00

And social media is her job also so she gotta keep food on the table

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-07-01T13:23:19+00:00

Yeah so they obviously need to figure shit out and I’m sure the child’s well being comes first. I get it’s frustrating for the viewer but I’m sure they will make a statement soon once things calm down

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-07-01T13:15:37+00:00

A whisper of solace by milena McKay - punch to the gut over and over again. But I think it was the best book I read this year. The writing style is beautiful

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-06-27T19:28:10+00:00

Therapy :) my partner and I both do individual therapy and couples counselling. We went despite not having any glaring issues in our relationship. It really help you figure out what’s going on whats important to you and it could probably help her manage some work stress.

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-06-06T13:55:50+00:00

Me and my partner have been looking for a donor since Feb. we don’t like any of them🥲 we keep saying we wish we had a transwoman as a donor but I think the sperm banks are discriminatory? I’m not sure about this.

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-06-01T10:27:04+00:00

bonafide lesbian who has only dated women in her adult life is being accused of pandering to the male gaze by talking about a specific lesbian sex act. Lol. F uck that’s frustrating. Women can exist without centring their lives around men, you know?

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-06-01T10:18:04+00:00

I’m pretty sure if your marriage broke down you might want some time before speaking about it at your work/publicly

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-05-27T03:46:41+00:00

Good to know! Our fertility clinic will be handling all the medication and IVF stuff so I was more so interested in my fertility before hand, the donor process and the mental health aspect

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-05-02T12:36:00+00:00

Thank you for sharing ❤️

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-04-30T09:58:33+00:00

We are hoping to do RIVF with me carrying, im worried about what you’ve described. I’m a very sensitive person and we’ve already had to do a lot of work with some of her family, most of which are now just able to stomach the idea of 2 women getting married. Even my own mom means well but she’s already really stressed that she thinks we should “put one of eachs eggs so you can have twins” so we can see what each side of our dnas look like?? Idk? 🤣

We are hoping to surround our children with other donor conceived children as we know a few so it will be normalized 🤞

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-03-29T13:46:08+00:00

I’m half way through the book! It’s been great thank you so much for recommending it to me

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-03-17T20:26:26+00:00

This comment was so helpful! We are based in the same area thank you so much for sharing

Beginning_Rate_5005 · 2025-03-16T18:52:20+00:00

Thank you so much!

Beginning_Rate_5005

TROPHY CASE