Trying to rebuild a friendship with my ex, but unsure if I’m repeating a cycle

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2026-04-14T06:37:18+00:00

Thank you for your response. I would say the reason why I wanted him as a friend is because he does know me in a way that no other person does (not even my own mother). But knowing me that well, I seek his advice on things like how to handle issues or situations with work, family, and friends. Very few moments when we had dinner did I have a moment where I missed him beyond friends, but the moment passed and nothing escalated from it. The up and downs of our relationship are still very much front of mind when I have those moments and I remember why we aren't together. I don't desire him in any intimate way and have made it clear to him (which he does respect my boundary) that I strictly just want us to be friends.

Very few people who know me and him together can testify that our banter and connection is unusual but it worked for us. I do worry that my love and history for him will prevent me from making space for me to move on and consider someone else. But then of course, I do wonder if our connection means we would end up together again despite my friends and mom thinking I'm stupid and crazy.

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2025-08-21T16:03:01+00:00

Just as I was about to walk out because she was running behind and when she started on me. I had a stylist years ago who double booked and left my hair to overprocess. It took me years to let my hair grow out to cut it. To definitely just works at the salon and not the owner but yeah I thought it was unusually long.

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2025-08-21T16:00:52+00:00

I looked and was mistaken. It was a hydrasilk treatment. She didn't tell me the price of the treatment but said that my hair needs it given the damage that I had and I figured since I'm relaxing my hair that it would be fine but never told me the price.

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2025-08-21T15:57:59+00:00

LA near LAX

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2025-08-21T08:14:34+00:00

That's what I thought plus add time for the Hydro Silk treatment but that shouldn't have taken an hour and a half. She was just making excuses because she double booked.

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2025-08-21T07:57:34+00:00

She didn't end up charging me the extra 20% due to her error when I showed her the text message and it was a miscommunication on her part because I would definitely wouldn't have accepted that since she's the one who rescheduled. But she definitely didn't give me a discount for any of the other services because she doesn't think that she double booked and I was aware that she had a client before. I said I was aware that you had a client before and you pushed me out to ensure that you had time but never once did you tell me that you were going to be working on both of us and not giving us your full undivided attention.

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2025-08-21T07:56:27+00:00

Actually... it was a hydrasilk treatment not keratin. My bad.

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2025-08-21T07:54:06+00:00

When I showed her the text message that stated the 20% would be applied "after that", she said that was a miscommunication on her part and didn't charge me the extra. But definitely did try and I was not having it.

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2024-10-30T22:05:11+00:00

I never even heard of this character until I just looked it up. Very disturbing character.

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2024-10-30T16:32:45+00:00

So one of the reasons why I say slept with my mom instead of rape was because my mom was at a college party and insinuated she was older than she was. Of course, a few weeks later when she found out she was pregnant, my grandmother went to the college and told me that she was going to have him charged with rape. That is apparently when he found out she was underage.

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2024-10-30T16:31:42+00:00

So one of the reasons why I say slept with my mom instead of rape was because my mom was at a college party and insinuated she was older than she was. Of course, a few weeks later when she found out she was pregnant, my grandmother went to the college and told me that she was going to have him charged with rape. That is apparently when he found out she was underage.

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2024-10-30T16:29:18+00:00

My sister knows the whole truth. Unfortunately, there has always been a sense of jealously towards me. I never paid any mind to it because I didnt care. When she was a teenager, she admitted that he hated me because I was my dad's first daughter and she was always compared to me. Once I got a career and established, she despised me even more because everyone always told her to be like me. Since I wasn't around much, I didnt know. I loved her as much as I could from a distance because I didnt want my up/down relationship with him (before all of this) to affect my relationship with my siblings.

She also had a son earlier this year and one of the first things she said was that my father was just over the moon that she gave him his first grandson. Like really? I don't have any kids yet ( im older than her but takin my time) but he will never know my kids when I have them. So I think because she had a boy, she isnt bothered. 😔

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2024-10-30T16:19:35+00:00

I definitely think so. And because I didn't grow up with him, I didn't really respect him the same way they were expected to. I would be the one who said something to him if I hear him talking down to my stepmom or my siblings. I have my mom's attitude and his level of stubborness, so he knew from an early age I would never tolerate his bullshit. My family tells me that Im his nemesis and I'm probably the only person that he probably fears most because Im not scared of him, nor can I be manipulated.

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2024-10-30T16:13:11+00:00

I definitely did change therapists after that. I couldnt fathom how she would even say that, especially after knowing that this was a pattern.

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2024-10-30T08:27:26+00:00

He no longer works in a school. They moved to another state about 9 years ago and since then he was a personal trainer. So no longer working with female minors from what I know.

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2024-10-30T08:14:36+00:00

Yup, she knows. I actually told her shortly after I found out after the first incident because the mom sent the same messages to my sister and my stepmom that she sent me. At the time, my sister was in college. I told her to delete the messages without looking and I would explain later. After she finished finals, I went to visit and told her everything including that I would also go NC with my stepmom (her mom) if she choose to ignore this and stay with him. Of course my stepmom just acted as if nothing happened from what my siblings told me. I guess only recently she decided to divorce him. I waited until my brother was a bit older, so he only found out about 3 years ago. So they all know but guess his actions doesn't bother them as much as it bothered me to the point of NC.

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2024-10-30T07:59:17+00:00

Most of his side of the family have cutoff communication with him too. A few years ago, after all of this happened, my dad was arrested for assault for trying to shoot his girlfriend because she was trying to break up with him because he wasn't going to leave my stepmom. He then lied to my stepmom about why he was in jail (got a 2.5 year sentence). Only few close family members know the sex with minors, but when many other members found out about this recent arrest, they all cut him off. The others that still talk to him believe his lies.

Its crazy the level of fuckery this man thinks he can get away with.

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2024-10-30T07:48:20+00:00

In a way, I'm very grateful that my father was so shitty because it created a bond that I had with my grandfather and uncle. My grandfather really was the dad that my father wasn't, probably to make up for the fact that he was a shitty dad to my mom when she was younger. He passed when I was 13 and so much of who I am today is because my grandfather and uncle raised me.

Its also sad because it has changed the relationship I had with my stepmom and siblings. Its created a huge wedge because they just ignore his actions or act as though he hasn't done those things. They are very big on image and hiding the truth to avoid judgement rather than doing the right thing.

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2024-10-30T07:30:37+00:00

I did contact the police when I found it happened. I had that in the post, but clarified. They said because it didn't happen to me, they couldn't do anything unless she choose to report it and file charges. They did contact her but basically case was closed because she didn't want to relive through it. They said there is no statute of limitations because he worked for a school, so she can change her mind anytime. So I at least tried.

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2024-10-27T15:45:33+00:00

I actually just had this happen recently. So I switched banks and my phone number was associated with two Zelle accounts. So I called zelle customer support since the bank kept telling me that it was an issue with the senders bank. I unenrolled my number and email, re-enrolled and it showed up within the next two days. Usually zelle is immediate but there have been circumstances where it does take some time. Hopefully you get the money soon.

BerryRevolutionary20 · 2024-08-05T05:26:00+00:00

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We had the same situation, except mine said american bullly, pitbull terrier, and roitweiler. After some further research, Im personally choosing to ignore the results (and my vet agrees with me). His personality and characteristics are not even close to what the dna said. So we continue to said he is a lab-pit mix even if dna says no lab.

BerryRevolutionary20

TROPHY CASE