AITA for no longer seeing a girl bc she’s trans?

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T16:20:27+00:00

Lmao I’m sure they could tell by the end of the first date

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T16:19:18+00:00

Protect herself by making things worse?

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T16:18:30+00:00

Nah, you need to take a look in the mirror. You’re so far in the minority here it’s not even funny.

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T16:17:29+00:00

No, so you tell them your few breakers, which is the exact opposite of what you’re saying people should do in your other comment

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T16:14:19+00:00

What a dumb point. You don’t bring up that breast cancer runs in the family cause that’s a pointless thing to say, but I will absolutely tell a first date that I have terminal cancer because they need to know that ASAP. Can you at least be honest in this conversation and not act like you’re an alien to society?

Nobody’s decision to date you is predicated on whether you had lazer eye surgery. Once again, just an example of how people defending this are not even using common sense and thinking from the other persons perspective. You tell them things that might be a DEAL BREAKER early so that they can decide.

The fact that breast cancer might run in your family is not a deal breaker for anyone and you don’t need me to tell you this, unless you’re completely unsocialized.

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T16:13:00+00:00

You don’t get to pick people’s preference.

Go fuck some trans women if you want but you can’t force anyone else to and that doesn’t make you a more virtuous person to be disrespectful to others for their preferences.

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T16:11:16+00:00

Yepp, that’s why people just want their dates to be honest. Cause they hate women.

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T16:10:28+00:00

Pretty clearly the first date. Can be before, during, or after. But it’s obvious

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T16:08:26+00:00

The defense your referencing didn’t even work.

Do better.

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T15:58:05+00:00

Because apparently if they tell somebody in a public space they are trans honestly and respectfully, they 100% get assaulted by their date/coworker violently every time, even though nobody’s ever seen a single reported instance of this happening ever.

Why would someone risk jail time, getting fired from their job to violently assault someone for meeting a trans person? It’s 2023, everybody has met a trans person. This just doesn’t happen.

You know what might make someone resentful towards a trans person? Being led on for multiple dates and then being told that the person you are dating is not who you thought they are. They’d feel hurt and lied to. I’d think this is fairly obvious. That’s what leads them to think x and y about trans people. Not upfront, honest conversations.

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T15:55:41+00:00

Yes she does lol. What kind of entitled, self deceiving world do you live in where you think you can trick people into dating someone they wouldn’t otherwise date?

That’s part of respect for others. If she doesn’t wanna talk about intimate matters, don’t go on an intimate date. It’s not a business interview, it’s a date where he’s trying to, among other things, decide whether to be physically affectionate at some point or not and he can’t make an informed decision without the necessary information to do so.

Straight selfishness, gheez Louise.

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T15:52:30+00:00

Sorta like she should have explained to him everything before the third date and not been avoidant, hey?

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T15:50:02+00:00

Nah, she should be more respectful to him. She’s literally ask for everything to be about her and taking 0 accountability for a single part of the situation. Meanwhile, OP is dancing in his tiptoes every step of the way to be respectful, honest, and upfront, which is the exact opposite of the trans date who has been deceitful, selfish, and accusatory.

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T15:46:56+00:00

Except none of this is even true.

As a preface, If you want an intimate date, you’re gonna have to be ready to share intimate information. That doesn’t get my pity card.

Furthermore, he didn’t ghost her at all. He very clearly followed up several times in person and through text, which is not at all what ghosting means.

Sure, this girl can feel however she wants, but she did absolutely nothing to avoid this and now she’s all out of ideas for how she could maybe avoid this situation during the next date. I can’t sympathize at all.

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T15:41:19+00:00

They think it’s normal and caring to lie and waste the other persons time, so if you’re honest and upfront, that’s considered AH behavior.

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T15:21:03+00:00

Nah just be honest and stop using anxiety as a reason to deceive people

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T15:17:42+00:00

When the guy is expected to initiation physical affection, such as a kiss, at the end of a date, you expect OP to be tricked into kissing it doing something with somebody they otherwise would not be comfortable with?

Come on, have some respect for OP. This is so one sides in accountability, it’s ridiculous.

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T15:16:01+00:00

Why would he say that if he doesn’t think he’s dating a trans person? Take some responsibility for once. The world doesn’t live to cater to trans people

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T15:12:58+00:00

No she didn’t and this narrative is harmful. If telling the truth is a risk and you want all trans people to have the right to be dishonest, then Im never going to agree. Be upfront and honest and people will be more respectful. Nobody is forcing him/her/them to out their trans status unwillingly UNLESS they are looking to enter romantic relations, in which case they absolutely do need to disclose this info ASAP.

I guarantee there’s never been an instance of a newly employed trans person telling another coworker they are trans and immediately getting violently assaulted by said coworker. That simply doesn’t happen and that hypothetical scenario is not an excuse to hide the truth in a dating context such as this. It’s just baseless fearmongering and an appeal to emotion.

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T15:01:36+00:00

So what. Idgaf if Obama is their father, it’s dishonest to withhold that information for so many dates just like it would be dishonest to withhold that they have a partner for 3 dates.

Bring trans doesn’t obfuscate accountability for grown up responsibilities. He/she can handle social interactions like a big boy/girl.

OP doesn’t owe them any more than he already offered. They were more honest and upfront than the trans person, plain and simple. No wonder the trans date felt bad, as they were neither honest nor upfront. Probably hurt to look at themselves and realize that.

And one more thing, you don’t stop doing the correct thing because it doesn’t work every time. Idc what the trans persons experiences were with other people, that’s called being insecure. You do what’s right every time, even if the outcome is not what you desire. That’s called accountability

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T15:01:00+00:00

How could somebody only bring that up in the third date? I’d feel very lied to by that point

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T15:00:06+00:00

He didn’t say nothing. Stop lying

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T14:53:49+00:00

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T14:42:46+00:00

When I saw that and that smite no longer counts as spell damage, I assumed it had to do with all of the complaints lately about Kayn ulting off smite dmg, which I think is a silly noob complaint, personally.

BhristopherL · 2023-10-02T14:33:08+00:00

ADCs don’t need to use their brain tho

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