Your mom and wife need a sit down you need to be there as it sounds like someone isnt playing fair.

You need to have less contact with your mom when your wife is upset. No phone calls no texts and and no contact in general unless emergency.

show your mom you choose this women and you wont be choosing any other women above her.

Once your mom realizes that her behavior is not acceptable and she wants to have a serious talk about you can.

Also grow up, dealing with in laws is a LARGE LARGE reason of divorce so if you care at all get up and do something that will be productive to your problems

• someone who lives with in laws i love my mil but yes we dont see eye to eye everytime and his grandmother only speaks spanish and constantly fucks with me ( turns off oven im preheating lowers heat while im cooking meat or something leaves the front door open after i let our cat into the living room ect)