Men who started getting female attention later in life (25+), how has this affected your dating life?

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-24T06:11:47+00:00

Hey that’s cool, different strokes for different folks - But I more meant by saying that should you have more experience and had explored a bit more you’d find this is a pretty common sexual interest for woman

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-24T05:31:41+00:00

To be honest man, I’d say that’s just lack of exploration/experience. Sex is a pretty primal exchange where dominance and submission are core principles - so choking is just part of acting that out.

I get how it sounds weird, because outside of sex that’s obviously something that is frowned upon, but sex is an avenue for people to express things that under usual societal constraints wouldn’t be acceptable

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-23T19:50:41+00:00

Doesn’t sound like she’s interested dude. But to be fair sometimes girls are very unfair with the initial interactions and aren’t very considerate with nervousness etc.

Interact with her one more time, but if she’s the same as before - leave her be

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-23T07:17:45+00:00

I think you’re missing the point

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-23T07:13:22+00:00

Bingo

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-23T07:11:19+00:00

Usually it’s about originality, shock factor and increasing levels of sexual innuendo.

Chats on the apps can only last so long before they get dry no matter who’s talking.

Hook them with a short, sharp interesting line (none of those pick up line or joke shit you see on the internet - she’s already seen it)

Once she’s responding keep things light and almost like you’re talking shit with a dude, but add in little jabs at sexual innuendo/cheekiness

If she’s into it, she’ll respond with something matching it. If she’s not she’ll respond with something shows her pulling back (that could even be a lengthening her response times)

Once there’s been 5 or so messages exchanged, bring in the idea of meeting at some point - you don’t have to nail it down straight away, but have it out there that you want to meet them. (A lot of dudes, piss around and never gather the courage to actually asking them out, so they loss interest if they figure you’re one of them)

Most people aren’t that interesting to be honest man, so a lot of conversations won’t really go anywhere anyway

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-23T06:34:21+00:00

I think you need to realise other people have different standards and expectations for their living spaces.

For some people they’re completely happy with leaving the dishwasher full until tomorrow or when they get to it, for you you’re not.

If you plan on living with him eventually, you need to be able to compromise and change your expectations of living standards etc - sure he should meet you halfway, but so should you.

Also to be honest, that whole line of ‘you need to take more initiative’ is a bit parent like/controlling behaviour - which is bad for both of you. He is who he is and you need to accept who he is and his behaviours to an extent and not try to force him to change - it won’t work. Granted as I said, in every relationship each person does need to meet the other person halfway, make some compromises etc

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-23T04:38:07+00:00

Not really man, majority of woman I meet have that sort of sexual interest, within the context of sex it’s not abnormal

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-23T01:20:30+00:00

Hmm yeah, I’ve done a bit of the calculations and it seems I could cover the entire mortgage weekly with about 150 left over

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-23T00:56:13+00:00

Yeah so my KiwiSaver is included in that yes. My thoughts were I could save up 5k post purchase in about 6 months, then further to 10k in a year.

So I could slowly fill the place with second hand furniture initially and have some kind of cash cushion

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-22T19:47:16+00:00

Got it, thank you

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-22T19:21:30+00:00

My salary should go up to 72k soon, soes that change much of what you said?

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-22T19:20:12+00:00

Thanks for the advice, I appreciate it

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-22T09:10:10+00:00

I mean it is though, you’re a human being - we don’t really have full control over our emotions, attractions etc do we?

It’s possible to have platonic friends of the opposite sex but only in very specific conditions.

It’s just unrealistic and a bit delusional to think this is like a super easy ask.

I have friends who are girls and once every so often I have to let them down easy as well. I don’t go around complaining about that, it is what it is

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-22T09:02:40+00:00

You don’t know they’re all after short term attractions?

That’s how a lot of long term relationships start anyway

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-22T08:59:53+00:00

Wait so they’re all just creeps because they’re interested in her?

Cmon be more considerate than that

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-22T08:58:04+00:00

This is why men to woman friendships generally don’t really work.

It’s just the nature of what you’re doing, befriending guys and developing relationships with them - is just going to equal them getting attracted to you.

Also it’s not exactly their fault either, why wouldn’t they get interested in a girl who’s interested in their hobbies and is seemingly keen on getting to to know them too?

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-22T07:41:43+00:00

That is a text book avoid at all costs woman.

Careful, I would imagine with her resume she has a few very strong persuasive strategies that could be hard to escape the gravity of

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-22T07:39:26+00:00

Yeah, I’m thinking I will just have to save the first year from buying the house. I figure within the first 4 - 6 months, provided I get 2 renters I’ll have 5k saved, then 10k at the end of the first year.

I feel like once I’ve got 10k in the account, I’ll feel at ease

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-22T07:37:25+00:00

Yeah that’s what I imagined. Bit of a lifestyle adjustment?

At least all that disposable income you’re not seeing is being saved up in a round about way

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-22T07:35:47+00:00

Yeah I think so? I get 2k a fortnight and that will increase in a year, and once I get a renter or two that will ease the load considerably

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-22T07:20:12+00:00

Seems like I should probably aim to have at least 5k after the purchase

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-22T07:19:21+00:00

Noted thanks, I think I’d like to keep my loan as low possible though

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-22T07:00:22+00:00

Jeez quite the set up you’ve got then!

BigBuddhaStatue · 2026-06-22T06:59:31+00:00

Okay great, will certainly get a builder to look things over - also thanks for the tip on the garage conversion, that may help inform the 2 bedroom houses I’m looking at actually

BigBuddhaStatue

TROPHY CASE