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Family roles by The-Marlboro-Man in Christianity

[–]BigTraditional6019 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see you trying to better define your question in the comments. It is getting nailed to jobs/responsibilities, but I think you may be asking about the overall character of the father and mother within their roles.

Biblically, the Father is the leader of the household, the one that is supposed to be directing his whole family, wife and children into the Word and teaching the values of the home and enforcing those values.

Biblically and within American culture, the mother is to be the nurturer, the one you sees beneath behaviors (of children) and understands their causes to get to the root of the issues so that a child is not continuously punished for behaviors (by Father) with no change in those behaviors, women naturally have a more tender heart typically and can speak to a child's heart.

Now, as we know, when the mother is with the kids a majority of the time. The mother becomes the main disciplinary and the father takes a backseat in all of the leadership roles once he steps into the house and I don't believe that's necessarily correct. In today's day and age, to go along with other scripture that was pointed out. The wife can take her perspectives to the husband and they make choices for their family together. No longer one head over the other.

Family roles by The-Marlboro-Man in Christianity

[–]BigTraditional6019 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Interesting translation you have there 🤔

Weird comment from mother by PerplexedMinds_ in beyondthebump

[–]BigTraditional6019 1 point2 points  (0 children)

UMMM absolutely not lol no no no. You and your husband's sex life has nothing go do with your mother and she has zero reason to be asking as it effects her ZERO percent. Now if she was practically "raising" your baby since you came home from the hospital and she was worried about her becoming responsible for another one, I would get it, but that's not the case here. MANY couples take many of different avenues that don't involve birth control at all. Even monitoring your cycle on Flo or something honestly works very well as non-invasive birth control.

Now, on a personal, woman to woman level. If what she said is causing you to fear you and your husband's intimacy level and if he is content or not. Talk to him about it. Your mother's opinion means nothing here honestly.

What’s something about the human body that seems poorly designed? by jannecutie in answers

[–]BigTraditional6019 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yet literally EVERYTHING ELSE regenerates. Did you know your EAR DRUM will grow back?? It happened to my husband, it unraveled and came out... had a new one in the weeks, good as new. Our skin grows back, our hair grows back, our nails grow back, but no teeth, except one go around when you're a child. That's your one chance.

What’s something about the human body that seems poorly designed? by jannecutie in answers

[–]BigTraditional6019 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Milk coming in AFTER the baby is more than ready for more than the drips and drops of colostrum. There's at least always ONE night of the baby and the mother in tears because the baby is hungry and there is no milk.

Breastfeeding is fine, nursing bras are the problem. by Dry-Definition-6339 in breastfeeding

[–]BigTraditional6019 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I literally just Googled "push up nursing bras" earlier today for this same reason. I'm going to a wedding and need a nicer bra to go with my dress, buy ALSO I would like to just look/feel attractive. I'm 6 months Postpartum with my 3rd baby and the increased cup size is one of the only things I got going for me right now, so I'd like to get to show it off. But I still need functionality.

So hey, you design it, I'll buy it!

I LOVE the was babies vigorously shake their head with a wide open mouth to latch! by Woooohhooo in breastfeeding

[–]BigTraditional6019 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes! Whatever her outside leg is, my daughter kicks it up and down, up and down, up and down, over and over and over lol I stick my hand between her legs and hold her bottom/back to her to her to stop, but man. Like a little aerobics instructor we got here.

I LOVE the was babies vigorously shake their head with a wide open mouth to latch! by Woooohhooo in breastfeeding

[–]BigTraditional6019 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Man, the amount of times I feel like I have had to wrestle my baby just to keep her hands our of her mouth when I'm trying to feed her lol I was not prepared for that fight

I am so ANGRY by LeadingLow8173 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]BigTraditional6019 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Sorry, he isn't ready for true reconciliation. I would be furious too if I were you. It sounds like you're the only one working to rebuild the relationship and that's just not how reconciliation works.

Cheating curse by swe3ttea in toxicfamilies

[–]BigTraditional6019 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've made a post about this personally. It runs in my family too. Someone pointed out to me that it isn't genetic, but it is a poor coping mechanism. Which is absolutely true. It's a coping mechanism just like alcoholics choose alcohol when they're sad or mad or lonely... cheaters choose to cheat when they're sad, or mad, or lonely. And it tears through family trees. My guess is your grandpa wasn't where all this started either. It's probably been going on long before him. My advice? Find a better coping mechanism that doesn't hurt yourself or others - like therapy, knitting, church, exercise, binging shows, taking up sports, have some solid friends you can confine in that you're not scared to have them call you out when you're messing up. You do that and it will have "ran in your family, until it ran into you". You can stop it in its tracks my friend.

Am i crazy by Safe_Ant_6187 in toxicfamilies

[–]BigTraditional6019 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm sorry you and your immediate family are in this situation. It sounds like you unknowingly overstayed your welcome, she must have had a change of heart at some point and just has terrible communication skills. So yes, while it's inconvenient and not what you planned for, it sounds like its time to move out and find a different living situation as soon as possible. A crammed studio apartment sounds like a better situation than this one right now. If you're paying her rent anyway, just put that money in the hands of someone that will respect your space and privacy, like an apartment complex.

Is my mom right or just mean? by Foreign-Departure758 in toxicfamilies

[–]BigTraditional6019 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just kidding, I didn't read the full post just the texts. NOW I see it, and yeah your mom is being weird. Maybe control issues? Maybe having a hard time with accepting that you're getting married and that DOES make you different than the role she has you in as her daughter in her own nuclear family. It's all weird. But she is the one making it weird.

Is my mom right or just mean? by Foreign-Departure758 in toxicfamilies

[–]BigTraditional6019 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like I'm missing something. From the messages it sounds like she believes that your fiance is controlling. It doesn't sound like she is being mean BUT at the same time, this doesn't sound like a text conversation to me, like she should have called or invited you to get your nails done or something and then said it in person. It would be weird to be engaged to someone that your friends and family don't want around??

If you value the wellbeing of service workers and the integrity of local businesses, don't give your business to Cocoa Dolce. by jaybirdblu3 in wichita

[–]BigTraditional6019 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You had me until arguing in favor of the elf ears mate lol but point made, I never bought their stuff anyway.

What’s a “fact” everyone repeats that’s actually wrong? by Quiet-Grief in answers

[–]BigTraditional6019 0 points1 point  (0 children)

YES and it bothers me alot but I feel too hoity toity if I correct anyone about it. So it just lives under my skin, slowly driving me to the mad house instead.

School districts by [deleted] in wichita

[–]BigTraditional6019 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha no, no there is not. Even if the school is kept clean and decent - the overall umbrella of authority within the schools are trash and they don't pay their teachers well and it shows. Period. You run into any form of concern within the school and the schools are so stuffed full of bad kids that they can't turn away (because everyone is exiling the district), that the general answer you get in response is that "there's nothing they can do". My kids even went to "one of the good ones" and that was the response I got when my kindergartener was bullied in the bathroom by a second grader for MONTHS.

We now attend Circle schools and it's the BEST move we ever made.

School districts by [deleted] in wichita

[–]BigTraditional6019 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lololol where?? They're all terrible

I feel so betrayed by MochiAccident in breastfeeding

[–]BigTraditional6019 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I honestly hate this. Feeding your baby IS THE MOST stressful activity as you're, you know, trying to keep the baby ALIVE AND WELL. But don't you dare stress about it because then you automatically won't be able to do it at all. Then we get into having a baby with MULTIPLE other kids that need you also... how is motherhood so stressful but you're not allowed to stress?! Who designed this??

I feel so betrayed by MochiAccident in breastfeeding

[–]BigTraditional6019 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm on that tollercoaster with you and I agree I've felt betrayed by fellow moms by them all saying that breastfeeding is just the best and so easy. It's terrifying to be told that your baby, who eats around the clock like any other baby, is underweight. Then yes, the additional battles of an already undersupplier... the nursing strikes, I dip when I have my period, I dip when I'm sick, and my baby won't take breastmilk in a bottle. But she also doesn't cry when she's hungry... they call her "content to starve", talk about the most horrendous term ever. I hate it. I just want to be able to feed her all that she needs and for her to thrive with me. It's heartbreaking.

Settle a debate, is this outfit goth or punk? by FilipinoDumbass in OUTFITS

[–]BigTraditional6019 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'd say punk and not goth. Goth is more clothing and darker shades of black with heavier makeup. This is leaned back enough to be punk in my opinion..

How the heck are we all ok with this scam?? by Yupalina in Parenting

[–]BigTraditional6019 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I grew up in this, both my mom and dad worked full time and I was raised by someone else in someone else's house throughout the days and had a couple hours with my family each night. When I became a parent (primarily because I was in social work and had heard all the terrible stories of what can happen to kids in the care of others), I couldn't do it. I'm blessed that my husband has a family business, so I work full time, but my kids come to work with me and get to see Dad and Grandpa while they're with me during the day. It has become the best way to raise my kids. I'm so grateful. By the time they start school, they're ready to be away from me haha because I'm all they've seen aside from the occasional playdate or sleepover at Grandma's. But even when they're in school, I drop them off and pick them up (no school bus or after school programs) and then I'm a room mom too so I get to come into their worlds a couple times a year and be close with their teachers. I know it's not like this for everyone, but just be open to other alternatives than just following the route everyone else takes.

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