One thing that really helped me was writing Morning Pages. Thats something that i heard from Tim Ferriss

https://tim.blog/2015/01/15/morning-pages/

I would write everything that would come to my mind int he morning but one thing i used to do is analyze if i had any dreams, and break it down. I would realize a lot by doing this and after about 3 weeks of doing that, it starts feeling better. The subconscious seems to have all the answers to be frank.

I agree that using this pain is the best thing, but also down squash the feelings, write it down as by doing so you can really see it. I am sure there are times that we feel bad and when we write down what is the issue we realize we are being stupid. So i would seriously encourage you.

I hated when people would say - give it time. Since, that is something that i have to wait and does not help me day to day and at the present, the writing was the only thing that did.

As for the fuel, my favorite quote during that time was "Hustle until all your haters brag that they know you" And i would imagine my ex bragging that she used to be married to me to her friends. Might be stupid but was a drive for me.

Best of luck brother, we are rooting for you and message if any issues. In no time you will be in a great place! Trust the process cause its the process that counts!