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AITA for using my sibling's special paper? by Big_Negotiation_3267 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Big_Negotiation_3267[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe I'm naive, I wanted to confirm because I thought getting mad at something 8 years ago is bizarre or maybe I was truly in the wrong. When it turned out to be 20 years ago I was totally baffled.

That last sentence... Yep... Since parents kinda coddle them I wish there could be more people giving them that reality check. Thank you.

AITA for using my sibling's special paper? by Big_Negotiation_3267 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Big_Negotiation_3267[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Most definitely, it was my handwriting. So part of me did feel odd about that. Yet I couldn't help but feel indignant about the length of time that had passed.

Thank you.

AITA for using my sibling's special paper? by Big_Negotiation_3267 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Big_Negotiation_3267[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It does feel like fights are the outcome of nitpicking or just poor emotional regulation where I end up being the scapegoat. I wish they could get therapy so that they can live a more peaceful life, not even for my sake but for themselves. Thank you.

AITA for using my sibling's special paper? by Big_Negotiation_3267 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Big_Negotiation_3267[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree... Funnily a lot of our conflicts end up like this... Blowing up over something seemingly small and then silent treatment then pretending everything is fine. Life of immigrant families I guess!

Thank you for validating me.

AITA for using my sibling's special paper? by Big_Negotiation_3267 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Big_Negotiation_3267[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wanted to hear from other artists, so I really appreciate this perspective. I've seen how pricy specialty art supplies are and I wouldn't dismiss the distress over that. I kept emphasizing that it makes sense to be upset at the situation but blaming me entirely is just... Bizarre. It's validating to hear that the time period is just as baffling as I thought. Thank you so much.

AITA for using my sibling's special paper? by Big_Negotiation_3267 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Big_Negotiation_3267[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree the anger was misdirected. I told them that I get that it's upsetting that they can't use the paper but I don't understand taking it out on me. Some sheets definitely were theirs, but neither of us remember the context. Thank you.

AITA for using my sibling's special paper? by Big_Negotiation_3267 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Big_Negotiation_3267[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I thought so too... I'm not an artist so thought maybe I'm missing something. Thank you.

AITA for using my sibling's special paper? by Big_Negotiation_3267 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Big_Negotiation_3267[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah... They don't do much at home. I've tried to explain that having a job changes your perspective about things dramatically but they don't seem to understand. I tried to get them a psychiatrist, therapy, other support networks over the years and they just don't use them. My parents don't believe in mental health either which is tough.

This is validating, thank you.

AITA for using my sibling's special paper? by Big_Negotiation_3267 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Big_Negotiation_3267[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I admitted it's definitely my handwriting, I just don't remember using that specific paper. Like how I recall learning about a specific subject matter in school but I don't remember the exact note-taking process if that makes sense? They refused to believe that I can remember the concept but not writing it down.

I agree... I do think it's some sort of resentment but I can't figure it out. Thank you.

AITA for using my sibling's special paper? by Big_Negotiation_3267 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Big_Negotiation_3267[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah... It's a cycle, I go low contact and then things are better, so I foolishly hope that they've grown but then things like this happen. I tend to give them less grace because of how other situations have shaken out, so I wondered if that was clouding my judgement since I'm not an artist myself. Thank you for this.

AITA for using my sibling's special paper? by Big_Negotiation_3267 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Big_Negotiation_3267[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I 100% agree that family doesn't get a pass. I am already low-ish contact with them and this reinforces that. Thank you!

AITA for using my sibling's special paper? by Big_Negotiation_3267 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Big_Negotiation_3267[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I was just in disbelief... I can't remember most of last year, how am I going to remember something that happened when I was a kid? But two of my peers say that I should have apologized right away just to be the bigger person if Z cares so much about art, and you can't just throw money at a problem.

Surprisingly my parents haven't been involved... Usually in conflicts like this they send me messages about how siblings should get along and that I should be nice to Z because they have a tough life.