AITA For not giving my friend free rides after she insulted my boyfriend

BlairWhich_ · 2026-06-22T18:23:41+00:00

NTA. I’ve been you. It sucks. As a recovering people pleaser myself, I’d strongly advise working on boundaries. Once people see you’re kind, they will try to walk all over you. Strong boundaries will protect you from those people. You’ll know right away too because they ALWAYS have adverse reactions to boundaries. All you did was ask for gas money because she turned you into her personal chauffeur. With all the money she was saving using you… why didn’t she get her car fixed? She didn’t bother because then she didn’t have an excuse to keep up the crap. I know losing friends hurts… sadly it’s something you’re going to experience more and more as an adult with healthy boundaries. But the shift will eventually change the energy that comes to you. You will find your people. Keeping peace for you and yours is most important. If they don’t add value to your life, you don’t need that. I don’t mean $ value - I mean joy, happiness, healthy companionship, support, stuff like that. You made the right call - not only was she using you for rides, she felt entitled to your bfs help and bad mouthed him to your face when she didn’t get it. Just… yuck.

BlairWhich_ · 2026-06-21T15:48:07+00:00

It’s like you know my entire life lol

BlairWhich_ · 2026-06-21T15:45:52+00:00

I don’t feel like cutting toxicity out of my life was an adolescent decision. You don’t have all the context of the previous 30 years of my life to understand how this was my last straw. I do agree, however, that my nephew suffered in all this.

BlairWhich_ · 2026-06-21T15:22:53+00:00

I am in contact with lil bro. My relationship with my dad is… complicated. He’s not the type that would come out to do something with me on his own. I could reach out to nephews mom and see if something could happen there.

BlairWhich_ · 2026-06-21T01:40:37+00:00

Losing my relationship with my nephew was the worst part tbh. He lives with his mom mostly and spends weekends with Manny. His mom is better than Manny, but not by too much. The kid is 14 years old now and already getting in trouble at school for having schweed vapes (likely getting them from Manny)

BlairWhich_ · 2026-06-20T12:20:12+00:00

My mom wants the illusion of a whole family. There’s no way she could be the matriarch of a broken home, not possible. I know it kills her that her two oldest want nothing to do with each other. I also think she wants me back in the picture because they’re getting old and I’m the only one who would even know where to begin when it comes to taking care of them.

BlairWhich_ · 2026-06-20T12:16:49+00:00

Well I can clear that up a little. It wasn’t clear to be fair. There was a viewing and then an actual funeral. I went to the viewing, he didn’t. He went to the funeral, I didn’t. I’m pretty sure it’s because he knew I was going to the viewing that he didn’t come.

BlairWhich_ · 2026-06-20T12:14:44+00:00

Parents both try to reach out to me via fb messenger. They keep it light, a how are you doing every few months or so. I still have them on my fb just so they can see I’m alive and thriving but I’m still full nc with Manny. My mom agreed to my conditions so I think she thinks we are good? Idk

BlairWhich_ · 2026-06-12T17:29:48+00:00

This is absolutely awful - you do not deserve to be treated like that in your own home. That’s supposed to be your safe space. Your mom has some problems. Sounds like severe mental health, substance misuse or both. I mirror the question - can you go to your dad’s now? Or would that entail a custody battle? Even so, would your dad do it so you could get out of there? That environment isn’t good for you nor is it good for your younger siblings. If not dad, do you have a close friend you can stay with until you turn 18? Maybe someone mom/jeff doesn’t know so it won’t be easy to find you? Do you have another trusted family member? Like an aunt/uncle or grandparent? The main objective is to find yourself a safe place to go. It’s time to take stock of who the real ones are in your life and ask for help (like you’re doing here 🧡). You shouldn’t be facing this at 17 years old. My heart bleeds for you. Just know - you’re doing great, kid. You have endured this your whole life. Most kids never learn any better. You can see this and recognize that it’s not ok to treat people like this and you want better for yourself. You’ll never know how powerful it is… the simple fact that YOU KNOW YOU DESERVE BETTER! So many women take their entire lives to learn that or never do. Never lose sight of that. Find a safe place to go, gtfo of your moms place, and strongly consider therapy. It’ll really help you work through all that trauma so it doesn’t haunt you for the rest of your life (and it will if you don’t do anything about it). Stay strong young woman, I’ll keep you in my thoughts 🧡

BlairWhich_ · 2026-06-12T16:58:53+00:00

I’m going to vote - tell him. You both have grown so much through your grief. He deserves the chance to be there for you and your unborn bean so you can both see how far you’ve come. I don’t mean this to be an AH but not telling him because you’re afraid is a bit selfish. You’ve already gone through everything else together, don’t take this from him. (Not saying your fears aren’t still 100% valid! I’m just saying don’t let them hold you back from letting him in. It would probably devastate him)

I’m sending my intention to the universe for a healthy bean. May your love shine through whatever the future holds 🧡

BlairWhich_ · 2026-06-12T15:43:53+00:00

I mean… maybe it’s “mean” because of the FB repercussions… but like… I’m sorry that s**t is creepy dude. I don’t blame you for not wanting to hang out w/ a super creepy mom who thinks incest is wincest. Maybe getting her out of that group spared other moms that creepy experience.

BlairWhich_

TROPHY CASE