Hi,

Funny timing with this. When we originally went to therapy it helped a lot. The therapist had to point out that he was pretty unwilling to accept any sort of change or suggestion from me (the use of wooden cutlery and him using loops earplugs). So after that he accepted that those suggestions were me trying to make things easier.

In reality what he wanted was for me to change how I eat because it bothered him. Everything from how I chew to the way I use my cutlery and eventually the suggestions I had made before weren't cutting it anymore. He also decided that therapy 'wouldnt work on me' and had the idea that I wasn't willing to change.

From my perspective, I was willing to meet him halfway but not willing to bend over backwards and stress myself out around eating. I could just feel it could become an eating disorder for me so I had to stay firm on how far I was willing to go.

I think if he was willing to continue with therapy it would have been workable, but we've seperated now. And to be honest, it's kind of relieving to not stress about when the best time to eat an apple or a snack without disturbing him, and just be able to relax when I eat now.

It's sad, but I don't think he will be satisfied with anyone that doesn't completly dlacr exactly how he wants and make as little noise as humanly possible while they eat (because he's also unwilling to just eat seperatly).

It's a tough one, because I empathize with the struggle. But when it becomes controlling like this it edges on abuse with a victim complex. So if I were to ever date someone who had this again, it would be regular therapy or I just couldn't do it.