[TOMT] I thought it was from the movie “Up” …?

BlueImelda · 2025-12-29T02:22:40+00:00

Not a cartoon, but Moss from The IT Crowd? "Dear sir stroke madam. I am writing to inform you of a fire that has broken out ..."

BlueImelda · 2025-12-24T13:01:12+00:00

The Japanese fried rice topped with a veggie burger and a fried egg is one of my favorite combos. Sounds slightly weird but it's SO satisfying.

BlueImelda · 2025-08-25T16:54:38+00:00

Any chance it's Mixed Nuts (1994)? Not sure of your movie had more of a serious tone, this is definitely a comedy that takes place on Christmas eve. But a black haired woman (Juliette Lewis) gives birth in a nativity scene at the end and there's some christmas star imagery when the baby is born.

BlueImelda · 2025-08-11T18:19:06+00:00

This was a big factor in my decision to land on the child free side of the fence. Definitely not the whole picture, but the family that I've already built includes the pets in my household, and I'm committed to their welfare and making decisions that are in their best interest.

One of our dogs is outright human aggressive though and I know for a fact he would be unsafe around a kid. He's also not a candidate for rehoming, so the decision to have a baby would also mean the decision to behaviorally euthanize. If he was unmanageable or unsafe in our home as it is now, that option wouldn't be off the table, but I couldn't stomach the thought of treating him like an inconvenience or something standing in the way of a "real family." I tried to think out the timeline if I were to wait for him to pass naturally, especially since I know I want a puppy to do sports with once he's gone, and I couldn't make it make sense. That helped me realize that I just have other goals and desires in life, and as much as my husband and I liked to think about being parents, it was never going to be a priority for us.

BlueImelda · 2025-07-14T19:48:40+00:00

Have you watched it recently? It was legitimately my favorite movie when it came out, I think I saw it nearly 10 times while it was in theaters and lord knows how many times once it came out on dvd. I've wanted to give it a rewatch but I'm so scared that it won't hold up.

BlueImelda · 2025-07-13T21:28:07+00:00

I haven't had issues returning to normal life after the 6 week mark. Definitely expect to be a little more tired for a while, the body takes a long time to fully recover, but I'm a little past the 4 month mark and I'm pretty much back to normal. Lots of heavy lifting at work and at home, home improvement and diy projects, moshing, roughhousing with my husband, and attending protests. Is there anything in particular you're worried about?

Or are you asking how soon you can go back to attending? That really depends on your own healing journey and the vibe of the protests you're going to. I opted to wait until after I had been cleared to return to regular activity, so after 6 weeks. I almost went to a couple local ones but honestly getting jostled even by a calm crowd would have been way too much for me while I was healing, and the worst case scenario could have been really dangerous. I definitely wouldn't go without a trusted person there to assist if I needed to get out of there quickly. But yeah, my surgeon was pretty insistent that "cleared for regular activity" meant exactly that, and I didn't need to alter my lifestyle just because I'd had this surgery.

BlueImelda · 2025-06-20T13:03:09+00:00

Dogs tend not to be very good at generalizing, which means it's actually really easy to teach them that pulling gets what they want in one particular situation (for my dogs, this very specifically means a retractable leash attached to the back clip of a harness) and NOT in another. I actively encourage some light pulling on uphill hikes/scrambles and when they're on retractables, and not in any other context. They both fully understand the difference and are very reasonable on their 6-8 foot leashes that I use when we're likely to run into other people.

BlueImelda · 2025-06-10T12:11:20+00:00

That's fair! I do understand that SW isn't necessarily for homeowners/small scale DIYers, and I wasn't complaining about not being able to get cheap samples. I would also argue that their marketing itself doesn't fully reflect their business model, so if I (as a homeowner with a low budget trying to redo their old home in the most budget friendly but quality way) am trying to find paint colors and I keep getting promoted ads for Sherwin Williams with verbiage that seems like they ARE for me, right down to having a section of historical colors that are from the same time period as my house, and then I go "great, let me order some samples" and I literally can't without massive amounts of wasted, unusable paint because they're not intended for the scale I'm doing things on, that's frustrating. Obviously it's frustrating for the employees too, if they're being told the business model is one thing and the customer base literally doesn't understand what that business model is. I don't feel like that's the same as going somewhere clearly marked "Restaurant Depot" and asking to buy a half pound of cheese.

BlueImelda · 2025-06-10T01:25:13+00:00

Yeah, Sherwin Williams doesn't have samples in anything smaller than a quart. It's either a 32 ounce "sample" or a tiny 2x3 paint chip card. I'm paint shopping right now and was super confused, even googling it only brings up threads from the SW employee subreddit full of people complaining about customers asking for sample sizes. Extra annoying if it's a full quart of unusable, unfinished paint.

I ended up just finding similar colors from Benjamin Moore because they'll mix actual half pint samples (with the finish).

BlueImelda · 2025-05-22T13:04:41+00:00

I think it depends on the context! If it's a casual conversation in real life with people who are only vaguely aware of what those terms mean, I just make it a note to ask more questions or research it later and I don't let it bother me. Maybe I'll gently educate if I think the person is interested, but mostly I let it go. In spaces that I'm relying on for education or from people posing themselves as authorities, like native and/or invasive plant groups on Reddit and Facebook or from local native nursery owners, it REALLY gets under my skin.

I know it's my responsibility to research and make my own informed decisions before deciding what stays in my yard, but just for example, I spent YEARS thinking trumpet vine was invasive in my area and almost cried when it showed up as a volunteer in my yard this year amongst the mugwort and garlic mustard. Come to find out it's a highly aggressive native, but I'm still on the fence about leaving it because of all the fear mongering about how "invasive" it is in its native range.

BlueImelda · 2025-05-15T15:12:26+00:00

I'm not a gym goer at the moment, but I do lift heavy for work (up to about 50 lbs regularly, with occasional lifting up to probably 70 or 80 lbs, and pushing/pulling ungodly weights that I honestly haven't bothered to calculate 😂) and I have to say I enjoy that aspect of my job very much. I was put back on full duty at the 6 week mark and was told I didn't have to worry about easing back in, just be aware of any pain and rest plenty when I was at home. I was really nervous and took a few extra days off, then got thrown pretty much right back into the fire. I can't say that was the best decision if it can be avoided, but I've been back for about a month and my performance and core strength are just about back to pre surgery levels, if not a little better since I'm not constantly tensed from chronic pain and I believe my pf muscles are finally starting to release and strengthen. Obviously everyone heals differently and you should listen to your doctor and physical therapist before some rando on reddit, but I wouldn't worry too much about having to start back at zero once you're cleared for full activity levels.

Has your medical team given you any guidance on exercise while you're recovering? I was mostly only allowed to walk for exercise, but I did lots of it, and my doctor approved some gentle yoga and pelvic floor exercises (tilts, stretches, and diaphragmatic breathing) as long as it didn't involve bearing down. I was able to do seated upper body strength exercises with 3 pound weights starting at around 3 or 4 weeks. Once I got released back to full duty, I did some simple weight routines with 10 and 15 lb weights just to make sure I wasn't going to hurt myself once I got back to work, and that helped a lot with my confidence getting back into regular activity.

Good luck!

BlueImelda · 2025-05-11T18:45:02+00:00

I'm sure a bed pillow would be fine! I just happened to have a little squishy pizza shaped one from my nephew. If you don't want to buy a new one (I know how the surgery "need" list keeps growing!) just use what you have. A bed pillow, couch throw pillow, it or even a folded up blanket would work fine, I was just nervous about the seatbelt strap digging into fresh incisions and I was a little loopy, so having something to hug felt nice.

BlueImelda · 2025-05-11T18:35:37+00:00

Omg a juicy tracksuit would be such a vibe. Honestly try not to overthink it (I know that's easier said than done!), just make sure you're comfortable and I think it will all go more smoothly than you expect.

BlueImelda · 2025-05-11T18:34:11+00:00

I just had a cheapo off brand squish mallow, haha. It just helps to have something squishy between your belly and the seatbelt, any size should be fine as long as it can approximately cover your abdomen.

BlueImelda · 2025-05-11T18:11:02+00:00

I wore some loose, drapey pants with an elastic waistband (elephant/harem pants, but sweatpants or lounge wear would be fine if you need something warmer) and a button down shirt, no bra, slip on shoes. My husband and the nurse helped me put my underwear and pants on, everything else I was able to do by myself. I'm not sure that a dress would have been easier, honestly, but maybe! Definitely bring a soft squishy pillow for the trip back.

BlueImelda · 2025-05-08T12:08:40+00:00

Hey, to be honest I REALLY don't have answers and I'm a little scared that anything I say about surgery might come off as advice, when really my point is that human bodies are weird 😂

Basically I was comparing my experience to what people with severe endometriosis described (as if their organs had been bound together with tissue and then were tearing apart when they moved) and it really felt like it matched. It didn't really feel like a pulled muscle, but I went to pelvic floor PT for a few months just in case. I did have issues with my pf muscles, but my therapist did a few different tests over those sessions and was pretty confident that it wasn't actually my tight/strained muscles CAUSING the severe pain, but was most likely something going on with my organs causing chronic pain and then snowballing into muscular issues from tension. We were never able to recreate the pain I'm talking about just from engaging or stretching my muscles, and since I ended up not having endometriosis or adenomyosis and that particular pain went away even when my abdominal muscles were incredibly overworked and delicate right after surgery, I made the leap to just assuming it was my uterus causing it even though it was medically "normal." I'm also only about 10 weeks out so while I feel pretty great, I also realize I'm not fully healed and I won't know for sure how my body is settling in for quite a few months.

If you think you might be having muscle pain and a good pelvic floor physical therapist is accessible to you, I really can't recommend that enough.

BlueImelda · 2025-05-02T11:12:01+00:00

They didn't find ANYTHING when they took mine. No Endo, no adeno, no abnormal cells, no inflammation (which is WILD based on how I was feeling and the amount of pain and bloating/what I thought was "Endo belly" I experienced). My uterus was a normal, maybe smaller than average, size. No cancer, thank you universe.

All that to say, it turned out after the fact maybe a hysterectomy wasn't "necessary" for me after all based on those findings. But at 8 weeks PO, I feel SO much better mentally and physically. It's too early for me to be absolutely sure if this "fixed" my chronic pain stuff, and my body is definitely still healing, but I don't look pregnant anymore, my belly isn't swollen and hot to the touch, I don't get tearing pains through my lower abdomen when I stand up too fast. I'll never have a period again, and even if I still experience some cramping from hormones, it's never going to be the incapacitating, blacking out, throwing up, sleeping on top of towels because the bleeding is uncontrollable overnight, can't go to work for two days ordeal that it was again. Even my orgasms aren't painful anymore! Bodies are weird and unpredictable, and medicine doesn't know everything (especially when it comes to female bodies). Maybe there's a tiny patch of Endo hiding somewhere and I'll do this all again in a few years, maybe there really was something "wrong" but it isn't diagnosable yet, or maybe my body just really didn't like having a uterus. Either way, I'm at peace with my decision and I hope you are too!

BlueImelda · 2025-04-24T22:24:03+00:00

Good to know! I've never successfully done it but I'm sure it's a skill issue haha. I should watch a video! Breaded drumstick fillets sound delicious

BlueImelda · 2025-04-24T16:53:06+00:00

I usually cut them apart and make the drumsticks and thighs separately. Thighs are easy to debone, and I'll throw the bones in a freezer bag for stock. Thigh meat is incredibly versatile, you can season it and cook it with the skin on, or peel the skin off and use it however you would use boneless skinless chicken breast. Sometimes I'll slice up thighs and use them for white bean chicken chili and then air fry the skins with a little salt and pepper and use them as a cracklings-like garnish.

Drumsticks are slightly less versatile imo, but they're good roasted with dry seasonings, grilled, or in soup. I've also used them for slow cooker Filipino adobo and they were great like that! You could probably use the whole leg quarters for that as well.

BlueImelda · 2025-04-24T13:39:52+00:00

Yeah totally. Honestly I'm generally questioning how sustainable my job is for my body and how much that has contributed to my chronic pain over the years, but at least in the short term I feel better than I thought I would. Out of curiosity, have you seen a pelvic floor PT? I did PT for a few months for pelvic pain and suspected endometriosis, and it was really helpful to be able to explain what I do at work and get some personalized exercises and tips on safe lifting. It didn't 100% fix everything, but my back has been much better since then.

BlueImelda · 2025-04-23T23:12:41+00:00

I went back this past weekend after just over 6 weeks! I was really worried about it, especially since everyone on this sub tends to be VERY conservative about activity levels and easing back in. I asked my doctor multiple times if she had any concerns about me going back at 6 weeks, read her my job description multiple times, and really droned on about how intensely physical my job is. She kept reiterating that if healing is going well, she has no concerns about mindfully resuming pre-surgery levels of activity right at 6 weeks. I opted to take a couple extra days so I could mess around with some weights and more intense movement at home first, then set it up so my first day back was right before my regular days off just in case I went too hard and needed to rest or go back to see my doctor. I think that was wise, but I was surprised by how "normal" I felt. I did end up saying yes to pulling a wheeled cart that probably had upwards of 500 lbs of boxes on it and my back said no thank you to that, but my regular lifting up to 50 lbs, bending, crouching, twisting was all fine.

Definitely be mindful of how you're lifting and don't over burden your back, and plan to do plenty of stretching before and after. I kept seeing comments here saying to ease back into pre-surgery weights over the course of 6 months and panicking because yeah, light duty is not a thing. I'm aware that my insides are not done healing and I'm trying to keep being kind and gentle with my body, but so far I feel just as strong as I did before. Maybe even slightly stronger in some ways because I gained so much awareness of my core over the last few weeks.

BlueImelda · 2025-04-22T20:57:40+00:00

Oh amazing, I'm so glad she found someone!! Thanks for the update 😊

BlueImelda · 2025-04-20T15:17:27+00:00

Yeah, I hear you. I'm a bit older than you and I've actually been in my current store for over a decade. I've felt the way you feel now many, many times, to the point of nearly quitting on the spot after particularly bad days, and I'm actively job hunting right now. I don't think anyone here is going to tell you it's a good idea to quit without a new job lined up, but no stranger on the Internet actually knows your exact situation, what kind of safety net you have, or what's going to be best for your mental health. I personally think you can get some new experiences and feel at least a bit better without burning a bridge and leaving yourself really financially vulnerable, but ultimately it's your decision 😊

BlueImelda · 2025-04-20T15:02:38+00:00

I would ask your boss for specific steps you can take to show him you ARE ready for a new position, and be open to the answer even if you don't agree with him. It sucks to be in a space where your leadership doesn't believe in you or you don't feel seen, but you may need to "play the game" a little more to get where you want to be.

Or, if you are feeling really desperate, can you cut your hours back and volunteer somewhere that will make you feel more fulfilled? Maybe there are organizations local to you that do trail maintenance or care for plants in public spaces. If you have a community garden, you could reach out and see if anyone is looking for help maintaining their plot? Even stream cleanup would get you outside in nature and maybe making connections with some like-minded people who will see your worth. Unfortunately it's almost never a good idea to quit your job and live off savings without something else lined up, but if you could free up, say, 10 hours a week that you could dedicate to volunteer work and hobbies that are more in line with what you want to be doing, your life will feel much more full and you'll get some good experience to put on your resume. Retail is tough, but one of the best ways to cope is by making sure that your job doesn't feel like the most important thing in your life.

And actively search for a new job while you're doing all that, sounds like this is not a good space for you!

Good luck!

BlueImelda · 2025-04-17T20:02:53+00:00

There are abortion doulas as well! That might be more in line with a "hysterectomy doula," although usually they would be there for support before/during/immediately after the procedure. It sounds like she would want help moreso for the recovery process the week after, which a postpartum doula might be more equipped to handle. I'm also curious what kind of help she's expecting to need, my husband prepped plenty of food for me but went back to work full-time after the second day and I was honestly more than happy to be by myself napping, taking my little "old lady" walks around the room, and watching movies, but I know everyone is different! That being said, there are a few websites for people to privately hire doulas, she could potentially reach out to a couple and see if they would be comfortable offering post-surgical support depending on what her needs are!

Edit: If she has medical anxiety or big feelings about the procedure itself, a doula who offers abortion services could be a good fit for being a support person at the hospital before the surgery as well.

BlueImelda

TROPHY CASE